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Clips from Hung (2009) - Comedy (S03E03)

"- ...And you can't? - You're gonna get me fired."
Hung (2009)
"Look, okay, forget it. Just the point is,"
Hung (2009)
"women like me, they like my..."
Hung (2009)
"It's not all about your dick, Ray."
Hung (2009)
"All right, what is what's this place about, Ray?"
Hung (2009)
"I mean, nobody needs coffee so bad that they're willing to pay $5 a cup"
Hung (2009)
"for some caramel macchiato."
Hung (2009)
"It's not about lifestyle. That's bullshit."
Hung (2009)
"and it's normal. And they walk up to the counter"
Hung (2009)
"- and-and they gotta-- - I'm sorry. Thank you."
Hung (2009)
"--Order."
Hung (2009)
"That's it."
Hung (2009)
"That's it. Right. I quit."
Hung (2009)
"I quit, Cammy. I'm out."
Hung (2009)
"Tanya: Happiness consultants."
Hung (2009)
"It's a wellness center for women,"
Hung (2009)
"coming to a storefront near you."
Hung (2009)
"...Thanks to Judy Pearson"
Hung (2009)
"and the Certified National Bank."
Hung (2009)
"- Uh-huh. - We encompass all needs."
Hung (2009)
"All wellness-type needs."
Hung (2009)
"Well, we do lifestyle and, uh..."
Hung (2009)
"Feminine-type suggestions."
Hung (2009)
"So it's-- it's both of you? You're partners?"
Hung (2009)
"- Business partners. - Obviously."
Hung (2009)
"We're not married. We're..."
Hung (2009)
"( Groans )"
Hung (2009)
"- and we'd like to focus on that... - It's very special."
Hung (2009)
"- ...Full-time. - But what is your product?"
Hung (2009)
"of what it is that you are selling?"
Hung (2009)
"( Screaming )"
Hung (2009)
"Good boy."
Hung (2009)
"Hand creams."
Hung (2009)
"Organic hand creams."
Hung (2009)
"Ray: Organic hand cream?"
Hung (2009)
"She was our first woman, how could she say no?"
Hung (2009)
"Women who hate women-- I hate them."
Hung (2009)
"The only female loan officer we get, and she's got a stick up her ass."
Hung (2009)
"You know, I probably should have mentioned the Orgasmic Living part."
Hung (2009)
"I don't think it would have made much of a difference, Tanya."
Hung (2009)
"No, it might have. Because women like orgasms."
Hung (2009)
"Men like orgasms too, okay? It's not the point."
Hung (2009)
"The banks aren't giving anybody shit."
Hung (2009)
"Don't! Don't give me that crap, okay?"
Hung (2009)
"The whole country's fucked up right now."
Hung (2009)
"The banks get the big bailouts."
Hung (2009)
"The cops, the auto workers,"
Hung (2009)
"the teachers and the perma-temps get the shaft, okay?"
Hung (2009)
"It's the way it works. Just forget about the storefront, okay?"
Hung (2009)
"What are you doing?"
Hung (2009)
"Tanya! What--"
Hung (2009)
"It's not her fault. Wait, hey!"
Hung (2009)
"Hey!"
Hung (2009)
"Come on, Tanya! Come here!"
Hung (2009)
"Just, uh-- just one--"
Hung (2009)
"just one-- one minute. I can wait a minute. Are you coming back?"
Hung (2009)
"Before you go back there, just while you're-- hello?"
Hung (2009)
"Judy? We were already--we had an appointment."
Hung (2009)
"Just-- just a sec. Judy!"
Hung (2009)
"- Tanya. - Jud--"
Hung (2009)
"Oh, hi, sorry. Is it on? Okay."
Hung (2009)
"- Yeah-- yes. - About the hand cream,"
Hung (2009)
"I know nothing about hand cream. I don't know why I said it."
Hung (2009)
"What I should have said is that women don't orgasm enough."
Hung (2009)
"- All right, Tanya, Tanya, come on. - Just-- shh shush!"
Hung (2009)
"For one second. The thing is"
Hung (2009)
"we can orgasm more, both in the bedroom and in life in general."
Hung (2009)
"Sex can be better, Judy. Our lives can be better--"
Hung (2009)
"you, me, the fucking country."
Hung (2009)
"In fear is where our orgasm lies..."
Hung (2009)
"- Okay. - ...Where our happiness lies."
Hung (2009)
"And that is why we need the certified national small business loan!"
Hung (2009)
"Judy Pearson, the chance to take our class for free."
Hung (2009)
"I want you to attend. You can see what it is we do."
Hung (2009)
"and I guarantee you no regrets."
Hung (2009)
"( Ray narrating ) The whole thing was nuts, from beginning to end."
Hung (2009)
"But banks and women, well, they work in mysterious ways."
Hung (2009)
"The vulva."
Hung (2009)
"Have you considered your vulva?"
Hung (2009)
"( Ray narrating ) Judy the loan officer and her bank teller friend Joanie--"
Hung (2009)
"Tanya: For years I apologized,"
Hung (2009)
"I disregarded myself and my vulva."
Hung (2009)
"But not anymore."
Hung (2009)
"Hold on."
Hung (2009)
"- ( Music playing ) - Oh shit."
Hung (2009)
"Sorry, I thought I had this cued up. Just a sec."
Hung (2009)
"Ladies, some wine?"
Hung (2009)
"Fuck yeah, fuck yeah."
Hung (2009)
"Fuck! Fuck yes!"
Hung (2009)
"Fuck, oh!"
Hung (2009)
"God yes, fuck me!"
Hung (2009)
"Yeah, oh fuck."
Hung (2009)
"Tanya: Okay, so, um, yeah."
Hung (2009)
"That's me. And really in just four short weeks,"
Hung (2009)
"uh, you can feel that great too--"
Hung (2009)
"both in and out of the bedroom."
Hung (2009)
"after this we move into the feedback"
Hung (2009)
"So any questions? Any thoughts?"
Hung (2009)
"Yes?"
Hung (2009)
"So you guys want a loan for this?"
Hung (2009)
"Oh yeah yeah. For the set-up,"
Hung (2009)
"But we have a lot of confidence in our program."
Hung (2009)
"Well, there's the private consultations."
Hung (2009)
"- What? - Ray: As my partner said,"
Hung (2009)
"Um, it's where the real money is."
Hung (2009)
"We can do an in-house session"
Hung (2009)
"or we could meet at a public place--"
Hung (2009)
"a restaurant, you know."
Hung (2009)
"I could wear this suit or I could wear sweatpants."
Hung (2009)
"I mean, we're really-- we're really very discreet."
Hung (2009)
"- We can put it all in writing if you like. - ( Coughs )"
Hung (2009)
"Uh, hold on a sec, you guys."
Hung (2009)
"We're just gonna check out the porch for a second."
Hung (2009)
"- Ray: Yeah. - Yeah no, it's a lot."
Hung (2009)
"- Yeah. - Take your time."
Hung (2009)
"The vulva?!"
Hung (2009)
"- why the vulva? - It's a vulva!"
Hung (2009)
"Do not stigmatize the vulva. That's the whole problem."
Hung (2009)
"Why do you have to freak out every time something fun is about to happen?"
Hung (2009)
"Because my idea of fun and your idea of fun are not the same thing."
Hung (2009)
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