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Clips from The Simpsons - Todd, Todd, Why Hast Thou Forsaken Me? (S31E31)

"Neddy? Neddy."
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"Oh, Maude, you've come back."
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"Completely clothed and untouchable."
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"This is the sexiest dream I've ever had."
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"Just one little kiss."
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"(howls)"
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"Just like Maude."
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"Daddy, why are you crying?"
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"Oh, just watering the old lip lawn."
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"I had a dream about your mom."
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"Don't you ever dream about her?"
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"Aah!"
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"(whimpers)"
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"It's okay, son. Just a bad dream."
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"Want some lukewarm water?"
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"Daddy, I can't remember what Mommy looks like."
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"I think I might have a video or two of your mother."
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"ROD: What's wrong?"
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"Now, that's the healthy way to grieve."
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"(Todd groans)"
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"(humming "Deck the Halls")"
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"(giggles) I'm scared."
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"Well, I have faith in you."
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"and what have you done with my family?"
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"-Answer me! -(chuckles)"
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"Oh, Dad, every time we make you shovel the driveway,"
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"you wind up someplace crazy."
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"Won't you join us for dinner?"
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"(chuckles): He sure will."
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"I'll pick him up tomorrow."
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"(crying): Mommy was so nice."
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"And she still is, Roddily Doddily."
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"Oh, uh, n-no, sir."
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"But, uh, faith is believing in something without proof."
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"No."
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"My math teacher said"
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"believing in something without proof is crazy."
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"You think the coat of many colors was crazy?"
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"Don't tell me you're doubting Balaam's talking ass."
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"Mommy, if you still remember me, give me a sign."
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"This is Homer Simpson auditioning"
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"for the air guitar championship of the world."
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"I'm taking you down, Bjorn Turoque."
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"(imitating guitar playing)"
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"¶ All blessings flow ¶"
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"¶ It's almost time to go ¶"
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"¶ On at noon. ¶"
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"HOMER: Ooh!"
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"Whoo-hoo!"
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"And for that simple reason, we are right"
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"and Episcopalians are wrong, wrong, wrong."
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"Gertie, a little traveling music, please?"
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"Soon as we can, we're replacing her with Spotify."
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"So, tell me, young Christians,"
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"if you could speak to Baby Jesus,"
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"what would you say?"
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"I'd say thank you for being born,"
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"'cause that gave us Christmas."
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"ALL: Aw!"
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"Mmm, I'm killing it."
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"Ralph, what would you say?"
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"I'd say, "Baby Jesus,"
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"thank you for dying for our shins.""
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"(congregation chuckles)"
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"And you, Todd? What would you say?"
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"(hoarsely): I lost my voice from crying."
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"Oh, come on, young man."
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"("Charge" playing)"
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"thanks for nothing!"
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"My mommy's dead and she's never coming back,"
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"and I don't believe in God anymore."
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"(congregation gasps)"
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"No. No! (whimpers)"
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"¶ His faith in God ¶"
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"¶ Is failing ¶"
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"We're all going to hell!"
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"You opened a doorway to disbelief in God's own house!"
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"Why does God need so many houses?"
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"Couldn't some go to poor people?"
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"You do not question"
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"God's real estate holdings and tax-free status."
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"(exhales) I have to let off a little steam."
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"Shucks! Shucks! Shucks!"
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"(grunts)"
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"That's it. Young man, I am FaceTiming the reverend."
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"(theme from Swan Lake playing)"
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"It's okay. It's okay."
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"I'm at my daughter's ballet recital."
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"Oh, is she good?"
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"Seriously, are any of them good?"
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"Reverend, like the pharaoh's army in the Red Sea,"
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"Oh, sorry, got to go."
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"I have to read the last rites..."
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"Lord, please punish my boy thoroughly"
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"so he may once again believe in thine divine mercy."
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"-Daddy, I have a problem. -Oh, you, too?"
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"I accidentally watched a 30 Rock by mistake."
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"Oh! Oh, my good, good boy."
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"-Mmm. -So it's okay to watch?"
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"Just Kenneth. Just Kenneth. Mmm."
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"(groans)"
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"Good morning, Rod. Todd. God."
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"-Good morning. -Morning."
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"Dear Lord, we thank you for this breakfast,"
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"Todd?"
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"Son? Can I just get an amen?"
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"A prayer without an amen"
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"is like a Tootsie Pop without a center."
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"But there must be a way"
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"to scare religion back into my son."
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"Isn't there some hell on earth I could briefly place him in?"
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"HOMER: Let me in, boy!"
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"The school bus will be here any minute!"
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"(laughs) To find your clothes, just solve this series of clues:"
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"what has bark but no bite?"
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"-(imitates buzzer) Wrong. A tree. -(groans)"
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"on the border of North and South Dakota,"
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"where do you bury the survivors?"
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"Uh, Minnesota."
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"You don't bury the survivors. They're survivors!"
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