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Clips from Friends - The One Where Heckles Dies (S02E02)

"What can we do for you?"
Friends
"According my client's will..."
Friends
"...to "the noisy girls in the apartment above mine.""
Friends
"What about his family?"
Friends
"Okay, so let's talk money."
Friends
"All right, there was none."
Friends
"Now, let's talk signing."
Friends
"You be noisy girl number one. You be noisy girl number two."
Friends
"I can't believe that this whole time we thought he hated us."
Friends
"...without even knowing it?"
Friends
"Would you look at this dump?"
Friends
"He hated us! This was his final revenge!"
Friends
"I've never seen so much crap!"
Friends
"Actually, I think this apartment sullies the good name of crap."
Friends
"How can you not believe in evolution?"
Friends
"I don't know, just don't. Look at this funky shirt!"
Friends
"Pheebs, I've studied evolution my entire adult life."
Friends
"And we've collected fossils from all over the world..."
Friends
"I mean, you can literally see them..."
Friends
"...evolving through time."
Friends
"Really? You can actually see it?"
Friends
"You bet! In the U.S., China, Africa, all over!"
Friends
"See, I didn't know that."
Friends
"Well, there you go."
Friends
"So now the real question is, who put those fossils there and why?"
Friends
"Hey, there's me!"
Friends
""April 17th, excessive noise..."
Friends
"...Italian guy comes home with a date.""
Friends
"You're in here too."
Friends
""April 18th, excessive noise..."
Friends
"...Italian guy's gay roommate brings home dry cleaning.""
Friends
"Is this tacky or what? We have to have this."
Friends
"I think we have enough regular lamps."
Friends
"What? Come on, it's not like..."
Friends
"...I'm asking for this girlie clock or anything."
Friends
"Which, by the way, I also think is really cool."
Friends
"Look, it doesn't go with any of my stuff."
Friends
"Well, what about my stuff?"
Friends
"You don't have any stuff."
Friends
"You still think of it as your apartment, don't you?"
Friends
"Yes, you do."
Friends
"You think of it as your apartment and I just rent a room."
Friends
"While you "mmm" on that, I'll go find a place for my new lamp."
Friends
"Okay, Pheebs. See how I'm making these little toys move?"
Friends
"Opposable thumbs!"
Friends
"Without evolution, how do you explain opposable thumbs?"
Friends
"Maybe the Overlords needed them to steer their spacecrafts."
Friends
"Tell me you're joking."
Friends
"Look, can't we say that you believe in something and I don't?"
Friends
"No, what's that all about?"
Friends
"What is this obsessive need to make everybody agree with you?"
Friends
"I think maybe it's time you put Ross under the microscope."
Friends
"Is there blood coming out of my ears?"
Friends
"Check it out. Heckles' high-school yearbook."
Friends
"He looks so normal!"
Friends
"He's even kind of cute."
Friends
""Heckles, you crack me up in science class."
Friends
"You're the funniest kid in school.""
Friends
"- Funniest? Heckles? - That's what it says."
Friends
"Heckles was voted class clown, and so was I."
Friends
"He was right! Would you listen to that?"
Friends
"I'd call that excessive."
Friends
"What?"
Friends
"Heckles played clarinet in band, and I played clarinet."
Friends
"He was in the scale modeler's club and I was"
Friends
"There was no club, but I sure thought they were cool."
Friends
"So? You were both dorks."
Friends
"I just think it's weird, you know? Heckles and me"
Friends
"Heckles and me. Me"
Friends
"Me and Heckles."
Friends
"Hey, would you knock it off!"
Friends
"Have you been here all night?"
Friends
"Pictures of all the women Heckles went out with."
Friends
"Look what he wrote on them. "Vivian, too tall.""
Friends
""Madge, big gums.""
Friends
""Too loud.""
Friends
""Too smart." "Makes noise when she eats.""
Friends
"This is what I do."
Friends
"I'm gonna end up alone, just like he did."
Friends
"Our trains are on the same track."
Friends
"I'm coming up 30 years behind him, but the stops are all the same."
Friends
"...Alone-ville, Hermit Junction!"
Friends
"You know what we gotta do? Get you out of here."
Friends
"I'll buy you breakfast."
Friends
"What if I never find somebody? Or worse, what if I found her..."
Friends
"...but I dumped her because she pronounces it, "supposably"?"
Friends
"Chandler, come on, you're gonna find somebody."
Friends
"How do you know that? How?"
Friends
"I don't know. I'm just trying to help you out."
Friends
"You guys will all get married..."
Friends
"Will you promise me something?"
Friends
"When you're married, will you invite me over for holidays?"
Friends
"I don't know what we'll be doing."
Friends
"I mean, what if we're over at her folks' place?"
Friends
"Yeah, I understand."
Friends
"You know what? I'm not gonna end up like this."
Friends
""Supposably.""
Friends
"Supposably!"
Friends
"Did they go to the zoo?"
Friends
"Supposably."
Friends
"Hi. It's me."
Friends
"Janice? You called Janice?"
Friends
"Yes. Janice."
Friends
"You remember Janice, right?"
Friends
"Yes. She was smart, she was pretty and she honestly cared about me."
Friends
"Janice is my last chance to have somebody."
Friends
"Jeez, look how fat she got."
Friends
"- Hey, it's everybody! - Hi, Janice."
Friends
"Janice, you're..."
Friends
"You wish, Chandler Bing!"
Friends
"You are looking at a married lady now."
Friends
"Congratulations."
Friends
"Sweetie, I'm sorry."
Friends
"You couldn't tell me on the phone?"
Friends
"And what? Miss the expression on your face? Oh, no!"
Friends
"Janice likes to have her fun!"
Friends
"You know what we haven't played in a while?"
Friends
"Hide the lamp."
Friends
"Monica, let it go."
Friends
"Then you'll just have to eat the other lamps."
Friends
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