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Clips from South Park - Cartman's Mom Is a Dirty Slut (S01E01)

"...entertaining senior citizens. Say "hi" to the South Park fans."
South Park
"- Whoa, dude. - I always wondered if that would work."
South Park
"Would you like more tea, Polly Prissypants?"
South Park
"- Would you like some tea, Clyde Frog? - Yes, please."
South Park
"- Why are you so cool? - I don't know, Clyde Frog. I just am."
South Park
"Yeah, you're strong and smart. Everybody likes you."
South Park
"Eric, you are the coolest guy in the world. This is tremendous tea."
South Park
"- No. - Well, something is bothering him."
South Park
"- Everybody likes you. - That's nice, Peter Panda."
South Park
"- This will be the funniest tape ever. - How much do we need?"
South Park
"Just keep rolling."
South Park
"No, Kitty! That's a bad Kitty!"
South Park
"Yes?"
South Park
"It was a beautiful autumn night, when the aspen trees were turning..."
South Park
"I've never seen a woman drink so much. You're amazing, Miss Cartman."
South Park
"I baked cookies. Would anybody like one?"
South Park
"Well, go right ahead, Officer Barbrady."
South Park
"His name was Chief Running Water."
South Park
"...but the next morning, I was pregnant with you, my little blueberry muffin."
South Park
"That isn't a very romantic story, Mom."
South Park
"Wow, to think all this time I'm actually a naive American."
South Park
"Terrance. Phillip. In the harrowing made-for-TV drama..."
South Park
"I have to go to Iraq and find my kidnapped daughter."
South Park
"Dude, we have to tape Not Without My Anus."
South Park
"I just flew into the studio. Boy, are my arms tired."
South Park
"Bob."
South Park
"- This guy sucks. - He's almost as bad..."
South Park
"Cartman? What are you doing dressed up like an Indian with a bear necklace?"
South Park
"The white man has mocked my people long enough. Keep your mouths shut!"
South Park
"- What kid? - He says he's your kid."
South Park
"Cartman? Oh, boy, I was worried there for a second."
South Park
"..."bear with wide canyon." - What do you mean?"
South Park
"Let me tell you."
South Park
"We got tired of dancing, so we found a private spot."
South Park
"- Chief, I want your hot man-chowder. - Whoa, hello!"
South Park
"What sucks is now we have to watch Bob Saget."
South Park
"What's up, homeys?"
South Park
"Dude, we should be videotaping this. We could make another $ 1 0,000."
South Park
"Hold on, Kenny!"
South Park
"- Oh, my God, they killed Kenny! - You bastards!"
South Park
"- Hello? - Yo, Pops."
South Park
"You kissed her with your tongue."
South Park
"Here, you children sit down and let me explain about where babies come from."
South Park
"- Are we late for the party? - What town is this?"
South Park
"Oh, man, I'm out of here."
South Park
"Yeah, when two women are involved."
South Park
"Here's a video that shows a very disturbed boy."
South Park
"Thank you, Polly Prissypants. You are my best friend."
South Park
"You are one of the coolest people in the world, and you are not fat."
South Park
"Is there anything we can do for you?"
South Park
"...when one of our lucky videos qualifies for the $ 1 0,000 grand prize."
South Park
"- "Little Boy's Tea Party. " - We're in the finals."
South Park
"- He's gay. - Okay, okay, I admit it."
South Park
"I might have made love to your mother at the dance, but who here didn't?"
South Park
"- You don't have any legs. - Oh, yeah."
South Park
"Well, hell, you know what I mean!"
South Park
"- I'm gonna buy the coolest go-cart. - I'm gonna buy a Walkman."
South Park
"- Dude, what the hell is wrong? - Nothing. It's just, nothing."
South Park
"Well, see you guys. I'm gonna go play in my back yard."
South Park
"- Thanks, you guys. - Yeah."
South Park
"First, it's "Dog Who Puts Hat on Master's Head.""
South Park
"Polly Prissypants, you are my best friend."
South Park
"Boy, looks like this kid needs some therapy."
South Park
"- I won, I won. - Grandpa!"
South Park
"Kill you guys. Kill you guys!"
South Park
"From everyone's accounts, I've narrowed down Eric's possible father..."
South Park
"...to the people in this room: Officer Barbrady, Chef, Jimbo..."
South Park
"...Mr. Garrison, Ned, Chief Running Water..."
South Park
"...or the 1 989 Denver Broncos."
South Park
"- The father is... - Who is Eric Cartman's father?"
South Park
"- You go to hell and you die! - Is it Jimbo?"
South Park
"- Or could it be Ned? - Could be."
South Park
"- Hi, I'm Trey Parker. - I'm Matt. Matt Stone, that is."
South Park
"You nut. You just caught us doing what we love to do most..."
South Park
"- Say "hi" to the South Park fans! - Hi."
South Park
"This episode is called "Cartman's Mom is a Dirty Slut." It's our favorite."
South Park
"- It's what we call a cliffhanger. - Excuse me. Excuse me."
South Park
"- My chest hurts. I need my medication. - You mean this?"
South Park
"- Yes, of course. - Do the dog dance."
South Park
"I don't wanna do the dog dance."
South Park
"- Dog dance. - Dog dance."
South Park
"- Bark, bark... - Good."
South Park
"This episode is about a boy's search for his father."
South Park
"And a videotape that might embarrass him."
South Park
"- Can I have my medication now? - Beep like a Jeep."
South Park
"Yeah, beep like a Jeep."
South Park
"- Beep, beep... - That's it."
South Park
"So now sit back and enjoy "Matt's Mom is a Dirty Slut.""
South Park
"- Cartman's mom! - Right, right."
South Park
"Cartman's Mom is a Dirty Slut"
South Park
"Cartman's not showing up for school."
South Park
"Yeah, this is the third day in a row. I wonder what's wrong."
South Park
"- Yeah. - Hey, maybe we should go check on him."
South Park
"- Come on, we're running late. - We're not getting on, you ugly bitch."
South Park
"What did you say?!"
South Park
"I said, we're not getting on, you ugly bitch."
South Park
"Oh, all right then."
South Park
"Maybe you boys can cheer him up."
South Park
"- He's in the back yard. - In the back yard?"
South Park
"- I would love some tea, thank you. - You're welcome, Polly Prissypants."
South Park
"Thank you, Polly Prissypants. How nice of you."
South Park
"- Let's go make fun of him. - No, this looks really serious."
South Park
"- I think we better get help. - Really?"
South Park
"- There's a news flash. - We saw him having a tea party..."
South Park
"...with his stuffed animals. - He was doing their voices."
South Park
"Eric is obviously suffering from some kind of emotional distress, m'kay?"
South Park
"- What do you mean? - Has anything troubled him recently?"
South Park
"Oh, of course, my video camera."
South Park
"- Is that legal? - Oh, hell yes."
South Park
"That's a lovely dress you are wearing, Polly Prissypants."
South Park
"- You are smart and cool. - Yes, you are strong, smart and cool."
South Park
"Thank you. What do you think about me, Clyde Frog?"
South Park
"I think you're a big, fat piece of crap."
South Park
"I wanna know where I came from."
South Park
"...sometimes when a man and a woman are attracted to each other..."
South Park
"...they want to be close to each other."
South Park
"And sometimes the man puts his hoo-hoo-dilly..."
South Park
"...in the woman's cha-cha."
South Park
"...at the 1 2th Annual Drunken Barn Dance."
South Park
"I wouldn't mind getting ahold of your cookies."
South Park
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