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Clips from Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015) - Kimmy's Roommate Lemonades! (S03E03)

"Do you really think that's what the voters want?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Let's ask 'em."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Hey, Meth-Head Charlie."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Gonna vote for me tomorrow?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Of course. Wait."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"- Vote. - Oh, then, no, I can't."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Sex offender. Big-time."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Pervert Rick?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Canadian."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"And Titus won't register to vote"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"because he refuses to do jury duty."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"He says he has no peers."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"So who can vote tomorrow?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Only one person?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Kimmy!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I got to get that dumb ginger to vote for..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"- Anyone but you. - Me."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"- I thought you were my boyfriend. - I am."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"It's, like, all I talk about. "My boyfriend's on a cruise.""
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
""My boyfriend's a great singer.""
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
""Hey, that pug dog looks just like my boyfriend.""
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"like two white ladies looking at a salad!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You were spying on me?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You know what?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I can't with you right now."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You better call "Bucky With The Good Hair.""
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Jeff is just a friend."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Stop saying it like it's a normal name."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"So we could see the TV."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"And if Jorpf, or whatever he calls himself,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
""Oh, I don't know. It was all I had clean.""
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Boom, boy, bye, foop."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ Boom, boy, bye, foop ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"What?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"No, no, no, over here, dear."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"- Come on, come to Lillian. - Here, girl. Here, girl!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Come on! Come on, girl!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Mmm, num, num, num, num."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"she's gonna stop me from bringing clean water to this neighborhood."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"- Really? - Mm-hmm."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"No!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"clean up the sludgefront, more yuppies will move in."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"And you know what yuppies eat?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"...and ice cream that tastes like lavender."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"No, that's a smell!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"But you'll have the most beautiful new waterfront..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"with ducks in it,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"ducks that have babies."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"- Aww. How many? - It doesn't matter!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"where they bury all the unclaimed bodies."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Now, I forget."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Do you like sleeping in a giant pit full of skeletons?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Good morning, everyone."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Just FYI, this tour is only for prospective students."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"So, if you're here for the Al-Anon meeting,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"that's downstairs."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Uh, and if you're here"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"for what you should know is an unauthorized and very incorrect"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Oh, okay, great."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"about your crossing guard program."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Do the professors here have real-world crossing guard experience?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Or are they these ivory-tower types"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I-I don't think we have a crossing guard program."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Yeah, I'm on a pretty serious career track here."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Well, that's awesome."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"But you never know. You might surprise yourself."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Philosophy? Like what is the sound of one hand clapping?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"So stupid. It's this."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Kshew! Kshew!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Sure, but philosophy's so much more than that."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Right. Right. Penguin with teeth."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Like, okay, so..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Okay, but what if you're really just a brain"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Whoa."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"This is making my head all tingly, like that time I put Pop Rocks on a Q-tip."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Uh-oh, my vat brain is telling my imaginary arm to high-five!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Oh!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I'm sorry. I get a little carried away."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Should we continue with the tour?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I don't know. Is there a tour?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Is this building even here?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"both living and dead."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ I don't kairr ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ I don't kairr ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"♪ Guido, nah ♪"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"You're not answering your phone."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"If you must know,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Like my heart, it's over there in a plastic bag full of rice, drying out."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Titus, I know you don't believe me,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Who?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Okay, I know I'm not a great singer like you..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I swear, babe, on my Pupazza's Ping-Pong ball eyes,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"- We met at the gym. - The gayest place to meet someone!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Titus, you were away for months on that cruise."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Was I not supposed to have any friends?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I didn't. I had nothing but enemies, because I love you."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I love you, too."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"- So why won't you believe me? - Because!"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Two gay men can't just be friends,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"just like a straight woman and a straight man can't be friends."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Well, let me prove you wrong."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Just come with us."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Please."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Refrigerator? Seriously?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"But that's why I go by my middle name, Perry."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Um, so..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"this is my mom and dad,"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"and those are my sisters, Payton and Ditka."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"My dad was a security guard at the Tootsie Roll factory..."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"...ful. That's awful."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"...fell over a railing and got sucked into a chocolate-mixing machine."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Oh, no."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Still a little bit awesome."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"After that, it was up to me to take care of the family."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"I'm sorry. That stinks on ice."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"But you can't control the world."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"It's part of why I got into philosophy."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"What does it mean to be a good person, and how do you make those choices?"
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"Huh. Maybe philosophy can help me."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
"They both seem equally good or bad, and I'm just stuck in the middle."
Unbreakable Kimmy Schmidt(2015)
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