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Clips from South Park - Tweek x Craig (S19E19)

"# Ample parking day or night #"
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"# People spouting, "Howdy, neighbor!" #"
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"# Come on down to South Park and meet some friends of mine #"
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"from our Asian-American students, and..."
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"The art tries to show that all love is magical,"
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"like in Lisa Akimoto's piece,"
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""Tweek and Craig: Forbidden Love.""
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"Kelly Zhou goes a bit more whimsical"
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"Dude, what the fuck?"
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"is usually dominating the uke, or "bottom,""
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"No. We would know."
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"Uh, excuse me. Why are you doing this?"
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"[ Speaking Korean ]"
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"I don't know. That was Korean. I'm Japanese."
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"What is going on, huh?!"
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"Me and him aren't together! Why is this happening?!"
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"What if my parents find out?! Aah!"
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"a lot of rumors flying around."
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"What's wrong with being gay? Nothing wrong with that."
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"If there is a romantic relationship here,"
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"you have to make sure your partner is comfortable"
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"but you still have to follow some guidelines, all right?"
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"But I'm not gay!"
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"Okay? Let's try it out."
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"You want two weeks detention instead?!"
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"Okay. Good."
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""You may touch my penis. I'm comfortable with that.""
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""No, you may not touch my penis at this time.""
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"if you wanted to take a gander at Tweek's asshole?"
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"What?"
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"Go talk to him, Randy, and be delicate."
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"I'm confused, Dad. There was this thing at school."
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"of genetic, hormonal, and environmental influences."
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"The Asians?"
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"I-I know all this stuff, Stan."
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"Oh, hey, Thomas!"
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"Hey, we heard about Craig."
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"What about Craig?"
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"We're so proud of you, Tweek."
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"Can I give you some money?"
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"# The Book of Love is long and boring #"
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"# In fact, that's where music comes from #"
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"# Some of it's just really dumb #"
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"# And you-u-u-u-u-u #"
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"If they've been gay this whole time,"
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"I'm pretty sure Craig has seen my wiener."
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"- [ Twinkle! ] - Oh, come on!"
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"then it takes form in all shapes and sizes. Tee hee!"
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"I guess just because I don't understand it"
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"Really? Can I?"
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"Oh, thank you! I will!"
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"Tee hee hee! Tee hee hee hee!"
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"[ Twinkle! ]"
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"You just need a little spark of magic."
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"Ooh, love is in the air!"
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"And do you think I'm cute, too?"
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"[ Bell ringing ]"
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"Yeah?"
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"- You guys! You guys! Hurry! - What?"
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"You got a fucking problem, man?"
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"Hello. Mr. Tucker?"
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"I need to inform you that your son"
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"was in an altercation at school today."
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"God damn it."
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"to play with another boy's penis."
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"Money?"
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"I was just wondering if you could shed some light"
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"on how your people decide who will be gay"
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"[ Chinese accent ] What?!"
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"Y-Yaoi. Yaoi, yes?"
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"And Japan, of course,"
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"[ Doorbell rings ]"
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"CARTMAN: "Can't we just try? TeeHee.""
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"But it doesn't change the fact"
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"that there's nothing here for you to keep pursuing."
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"I need you to stop bothering me."
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"Honey, it's Craig."
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"Is Tweek home?"
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"Tweek's just up in his room playing."
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"Aargh! Aah! Unh!"
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"Like acting?! No, man. That is way too much pressure."
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"You're capable of more than you think."
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"Ugh! I'm a terrible actor."
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"You just follow my lead and try and make it believable, okay?"
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"What did I do wrong, huh?"
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"but... but why did this have to happen to my son?"
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"Oh, what? You know about this?"
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"isn't a decision."
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"Why do the Japanese make some people gay and others not?"
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"Well, you sure know a lot about this."
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"Hey, Tweek. Hold up."
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"We don't belong together? What suddenly changed, Craig?"
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"Uh-huh. And who the hell is Michael?"
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"I went through your phone when we went out last night, Craig."
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"I saw your text to Michael about hooking up with him!"
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"Wait, uh... T-That's not what happened."
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"You don't want to feel bad,"
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"so you try and tell me what I want?!"
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"Tweek, don't make me out to be the bad guy here."
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"No, you're not the bad guy."
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"But you've got spikes, man."
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"Dude, seriously? Seriously?!"
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"- [ Thunder rumbles ] - # Say something #"
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"# I'm giving up on you #"
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"I'm just here to pick up on guys."
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"Well, I guess I could try and help."
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"[ Sighs ] All right. One date."
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"But only if you help get Tweek and Craig back together."
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"Hi. ls Craig here, sir?"
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"Why can't you quit him?"
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"Thomas."
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"Five minutes. He's in the back."
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"I thought when we broke up everything would get better."
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"I was thinking maybe we should say we're back together."
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"Not that real!"
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"in a way I never have before."
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"You changed something in me, and Ijust..."
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"Maybe it's not so wrong."
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"You just need a little prick of magic."
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"Tee hee hee! Tee hee hee hee!"
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