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Clips from The Good Place - Somewhere Else (S02E02)

"And I still believe"
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"A push..."
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"Nope, nope. Absolutely not."
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"It's Looney Tunes."
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"It sets a very dangerous precedent."
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"can become good without knowing anything about"
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"what's waiting for them in the afterlife."
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"It's never gonna work, man."
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"right back to the Bad Place."
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"No one gets hurt."
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"Except them, forever."
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"Mmm, mmm, mmm..."
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"Ha!"
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"I don't know why. I'm just feeling kinda funky."
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"Otherwise, the results will be tainted,"
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"- at any point. - About what?!"
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"Holy crap."
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"I just almost died."
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"She needs to know what was said."
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"God, Eleanor, take longer next time."
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"Oh, you look like crap."
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"I was outside the supermarket arguing with"
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"That skinny little hippy body kinda turns me on."
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"I dropped the margarita mix, and when I went to pick it up,"
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"and I was just frozen."
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"And then someone pushed me out of the way,"
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"and the carts got, like, demolished"
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"by a truck."
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"I mean, I could've died."
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"- Oh, my God. - Wow."
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"So is the margarita mix, like, gone?"
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"That building is, like, right by my old dentist."
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"If I still went to that dentist"
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"I would've been like..."
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"right near there."
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"I was in Syracuse, New York,"
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"- No way! - Yeah, 14 days."
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"I can't believe we all almost died."
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"My name is Eleanor Shellstrop,"
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"and I think I might be a monster."
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"but something happened to me today,"
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"to become a better, kinder,"
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"more generous person."
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"Hey, can I use your credit card?"
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"You know what? Yes, you can."
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"Cool. It's for porn. I already used it."
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"You get laid last night? I didn't. Tried. Hard."
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"Stung like hell."
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"Oh, yeah. Hey."
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"Listen, dude. What you're doing here..."
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"selling fake medicine to people, tricking them..."
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"Give me your company ID."
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"Thank you. And your parking pass."
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"- And your panties, please. - Dude."
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"because she doesn't work here anymore."
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"Yeah. Company's being investigated for fraud,"
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"so I'm helping the feds bring everyone down."
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"Dude, get help."
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"Hey, Eleanor, do you want to come to Lauren's baby shower?"
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"sortment of brownies that I will be bringing"
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"to Lauren's baby shower?"
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"Hi there, do you have a second to talk about"
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"the environment?"
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"Hey. Remember me?"
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"No, I'm not gonna hurt you, man."
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"I came to apologize."
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"There. I did it. I apologized."
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"- No, you didn't. - Yes, I did, assface."
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"like a thousand times."
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"Apology accepted."
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"Hey, I'm on kinda like a self-improvement kick."
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"Do you think you could help me out,"
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"teach me to get all horny for the environment"
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"Nice to meet you. Hi."
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"Mm, babes, get in on these nachos."
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"- They're delish. - Mmm, mm-hmm."
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"I'm actually trying to eat vegetarian."
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"Ew! Why?"
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"with their cute widdle faces"
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"because people stuff them into tiny cages"
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"Okay, guys, um,"
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"can I say something for a second?"
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"I do. I mean, I went through a really rough time"
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"and people selling T-shirts with my face on them,"
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"- I love you, you dumb sluts! - Awww."
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"Come on."
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"Okay, there's probably something we should tell you."
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"Or not. We could also not."
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"I tore your dress, and then I lied about it."
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"who made and sold the T-shirts."
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"But, we did not keep the money."
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"Okay."
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"That took a lot of courage"
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"You stupid skank! How could you do that to me?!"
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"I hate you! You're both disgusting hogs,"
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"I'm still really glad we told the truth."
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"Okay."
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"And can you throw these plants in the trash?"
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"This is on you."
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"and walked away, like everyone else does."
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"like six times and never said anything."
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"But I'm trying to be good!"
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"How is that working out for you?"
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"It's open, dummy."
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"Oh, hey, man."
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"You know, moving was a hassle,"
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"and I got diarrhea for, like, a week."
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"Uh, I know we don't pay a lot,"
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"and we need to know we can count on you."
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"Dude, dude, dude, dude, dude, dude."
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"Oh, sorry to interrupt whatever"
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"boring crap this is,"
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"but dude, you need to get dressed."
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"The Taylor Swift reggae cover band."
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"They're terrible. It's gonna be amazing."
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"Yeah, that sounds like more fun."
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"I've been nothing but good for, like, six months,"
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"and all I have to show for it is this crummy apartment,"
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"a lawsuit, a loose caboose, and an overdrawn bank account."
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"Being good is for suckers."
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