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Clips from The Good Place - Somewhere Else (S02E02)

"because of our bonds with other people"
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"and our innate desire to treat them with dignity."
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"Let's go. Time is booze."
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"I'm..."
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"going somewhere else."
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"No worries."
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"From the Cassat Foundation lecture series"
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"Can we talk?"
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"Okay."
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"Here we go."
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"that voice went away."
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"Your friend sounds like she's"
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"one pick short of a... pickle party."
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"She's a little rough around the edges,"
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"but she was also a really good person,"
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"See, I think that little voice"
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"I gotta go home. What do I owe ya?"
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"The real question, Eleanor,"
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"Am I a bartender?"
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"Good luck."
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"Ow."
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"Anybody notice I was gone?"
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"What do we owe to each other?"
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"That is the question Tim Scanlon asked"
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"decades ago,"
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"and it is a question I will try to answer"
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"over the next three hours."
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"Ugh. No thanks."
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"but it does warn us when we do things that don't feel good"
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"The difference between... the term "reasonable,""
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"what does it mean"
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"to be a reasonable person?"
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"...so why do it then?"
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"Why choose to be good every day"
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"I argue that we choose to be good"
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"Simply put, we are not in this alone."
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"Hey, dong bait, didn't you get my message?"
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"- Hi. - Oh, I'm sorry."
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"Office hours are on Tuesday."
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"Oh, I... I'm not a student."
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"Are you Chidi Ana... kendrick?"
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"Anagonye, and yes."
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"- Yes. - Great."
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"Hi. My name is Eleanor Shellstrop."
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"So, Michael, you're saying there's"
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"Love that. Major drama."
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"is that a person's score during her time on Earth"
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"That's not supposed to be possible."
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"Uh, Jason, growing up in Jacksonville,"
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"Me and my friends whipped empty spray paint cans"
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"And now he's so much better."
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"Okay, let the immortal beings talk, darling."
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"So they got better in your little pretend world."
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"the very method we use to deem them good or bad..."
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"is so fundamentally flawed and unreasonable"
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"that hundreds of millions of people"
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"to an eternity of torture."
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"Look, I got goosebumps."
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"Huh, yeah."
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"Doesn't happen very often."
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"Wow, so you saw your parents in the test?"
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"And I immediately fell right back into my old pattern,"
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"desperately trying to impress them"
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"The little voice in your head sounds like the old lady"
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"Oh, yeah, sorry. Maggie Smith is my godmother."
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"and walked away."
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"Man."
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"I'm proud of you, hot stuff."
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"Whatever progress I have made,"
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"it's because you and I have become mates."
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"Think about everything that's happened to us."
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"then Michael showed up."
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"This has been one of the craziest years of my life."
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"One of?"
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"Yeah, I'm not sure what I would do"
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"if one more insane thing happened."
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"Hi, Jason. I love you."
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"Oh, word?"
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"Word."
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"And I hereby stop avoiding this topic"
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"Or that my brain is grinding"
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"like a fork in a garbage disposal."
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"All right. Whatever."
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"Hey, guess what. I think I love you too, girl."
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"I'm not a girl."
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"I don't know what I am."
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"Hey, man. What's up?"
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"Hot diggity dog."
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"Oh, no!"
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"will always be "hot diggity dog.""
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"Whatever."
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"A'ight. Second thing:"
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"we figured out a plan to save your souls."
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"For the time being, The Judge is gonna put you"
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"in your own medium places,"
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"like Mindi St. Clair."
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"every angle I can think of"
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"to get you guys into the Good Place, for real."
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"This is great. So we'd all be together?"
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"So if you're all together, it ain't medium."
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"How much time will we be alone?"
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"Hard to say. Uh, could be a month."
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"Could be a million years."
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"So, between a month and a million years."
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"- Yeah, give or take. - Yeah? Somewhere in there."
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"but I need more time to build my case,"
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"and it's either this or back to the Bad Place."
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"Yeah."
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"Okay, I'm sorry if that's blunt, Your Honor,"
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"Also, Chidi just laid one on me, so I'm kinda dizzy."
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"You two kissed? Hot diggity dog!"
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"That's what I said!"
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"Why should we have to go live alone in a boring void"
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"- How is that justice? - Okay."
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"y'all didn't get good enough to pass the tests"
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"that you improved in Michael's fake neighborhood"
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"is because you thought there was a reward"
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"at the end of the rainbow."
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"You're supposed to good things"
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"because you're good!"
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