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Clips from South Park (1997) (S21E21)

"and here's you dressed as Columbus"
South Park (1997)
"You have to understand, it was 2013."
South Park (1997)
"Yeah, but, Dad, you seem to be really stoked on Columbus."
South Park (1997)
"it's only a matter of time before everyone else does."
South Park (1997)
"What's the point, Sharon?"
South Park (1997)
"Ugh."
South Park (1997)
"What makes you, you?"
South Park (1997)
"DNAandMe is a genetic service"
South Park (1997)
"that can help you find out"
South Park (1997)
"exactly who your ancestors were."
South Park (1997)
"Turns out I'm not totally white."
South Park (1997)
"I'm a victim of oppression!"
South Park (1997)
"But with DNAandMe, I found out that I'm 2.1% black!"
South Park (1997)
"'Sup, nigga."
South Park (1997)
"Nobody's making fun of me now,"
South Park (1997)
"DNAandMe. Are you in?"
South Park (1997)
"[ Indistinct chatter ]"
South Park (1997)
"All right. Everyone's here. Let's do this."
South Park (1997)
"$100 cash. No questions asked."
South Park (1997)
"Are we good?"
South Park (1997)
"Okay. Let's get this over with."
South Park (1997)
"Do not talk of this to anyone."
South Park (1997)
"I think we're ready to get started."
South Park (1997)
"and send it in the mail."
South Park (1997)
"Yeah, I know, but I just -- I was really excited about it,"
South Park (1997)
"wanted everyone to witness my test."
South Park (1997)
"All right. Open wide."
South Park (1997)
"Okay. I'll get this back to the lab"
South Park (1997)
"and get the results to you as soon as possible."
South Park (1997)
"[ Telephone rings ]"
South Park (1997)
"[Distorted] Listen to me carefully."
South Park (1997)
"is a fraud."
South Park (1997)
"Who is this?"
South Park (1997)
"You will go online and search Instagram"
South Park (1997)
"for images of Randy Marsh."
South Park (1997)
"I most certainly will not."
South Park (1997)
"Randy Marsh is a hypocrite and a fake."
South Park (1997)
"You will be taken down with him when he is exposed."
South Park (1997)
"We know where you live,"
South Park (1997)
"and we know how to make you suffer."
South Park (1997)
"Now you listen here, Mr. Man."
South Park (1997)
"It's all fake news. Fake news."
South Park (1997)
"Then speak with Marsh yourself."
South Park (1997)
"The truth is out there."
South Park (1997)
"Hmmm. Sounds like maybe the Galtmans"
South Park (1997)
"Shelley, we've got an emergency!"
South Park (1997)
"We're getting rid of all the Columbus stuff in this house!"
South Park (1997)
"I don't give a shit about Columbus."
South Park (1997)
"He sounds suspicious. We got to get rid"
South Park (1997)
"Where are they?"
South Park (1997)
"standing there with a big smile on your face."
South Park (1997)
"You didn't say anything about it"
South Park (1997)
"being insensitive then, did you?"
South Park (1997)
"that you dressed up as Columbus for our wedding,"
South Park (1997)
"but I decided -- Oh, now!"
South Park (1997)
"But you were right there, going along with it!"
South Park (1997)
"They're gonna be coming after you, too, Sharon!"
South Park (1997)
"So you can just wipe that indigenous look off your face."
South Park (1997)
"Oh! That could be my DNA results!"
South Park (1997)
"Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no."
South Park (1997)
"Galtman residence."
South Park (1997)
"[Distorted] Listen carefully if you want to live."
South Park (1997)
"You will make this Monday a school holiday."
South Park (1997)
"Of course he did!"
South Park (1997)
"That's what liars do!"
South Park (1997)
"CARTMAN: [Distorted] I don't know, like -- like maybe say -- Like talk about cutting off his dick or something."
South Park (1997)
"We're gonna cut off your dick!"
South Park (1997)
"Kyle: [Distorted] No, dude. That's too far. Okay, okay, just say we're gonna cut off part of his dick."
South Park (1997)
"Just give me the phone."
South Park (1997)
"Hello? What? Randy Marsh is about to pay for what he's done."
South Park (1997)
"Protect him and you will pay, too."
South Park (1997)
"[ Normal voice ] Jesus!"
South Park (1997)
"Sharon, have you seen my Columbus staff and orb?"
South Park (1997)
"I have not."
South Park (1997)
"Sharon, Galtman called again."
South Park (1997)
"Somebody is out there trying to get me in trouble."
South Park (1997)
"Everyone was excited about Columbus!"
South Park (1997)
"For some reason, people are just pointing fingers at me."
South Park (1997)
"doesn't mean I'm gonna be the F'ing scapegoat!"
South Park (1997)
"Oh, God damn it."
South Park (1997)
"Will you get out of here?!"
South Park (1997)
"♪ And then he kissed me ♪"
South Park (1997)
"Okay, okay."
South Park (1997)
"That's it. Get off my property!"
South Park (1997)
"Shit!"
South Park (1997)
"Guys, what are you doing?"
South Park (1997)
"Just face it."
South Park (1997)
"There has to be a way we can --"
South Park (1997)
"Dude, there's nothing we can do, all right?"
South Park (1997)
"Is that what Columbus did? Just give up?"
South Park (1997)
"On his dream? No."
South Park (1997)
"Columbus believed that kids should have a day off school."
South Park (1997)
"And even when his own country wouldn't support his cause,"
South Park (1997)
"where kids can have that day off.""
South Park (1997)
"And when Columbus sailed to distant places"
South Park (1997)
"only to find people already there"
South Park (1997)
"who said, "No! Stay off our land!"
South Park (1997)
"We want our kids to have to go to school!""
South Park (1997)
"He said, "No! It's just one day in October."
South Park (1997)
"With just three ships, he sailed over"
South Park (1997)
"so we could have some 'me time' in October."
South Park (1997)
"And, yes, millions were slaughtered and throats were cut."
South Park (1997)
"then for what?"
South Park (1997)
"Sharon, good news! What?!"
South Park (1997)
"The people from the DNA test called!"
South Park (1997)
"They're on their way over. You want to come down?"
South Park (1997)
"I'm doing something."
South Park (1997)
"You sure?"
South Park (1997)
"I want you to stop running from yourself."
South Park (1997)
"We could be so happy."
South Park (1997)
"[ Doorbell rings ]"
South Park (1997)
"Just a second! Be right there! Thanks!"
South Park (1997)
"I don't have any feelings for you. Do you understand?"
South Park (1997)
"But, Randy, what about the --"
South Park (1997)
"No! No buts! There's nothing here."
South Park (1997)
"I'm not in love with you, got it?!"
South Park (1997)
"Hi. Sorry. You guys have my results?"
South Park (1997)
"there was an irregularity with your test."
South Park (1997)
"What, you found something there you didn't expect to find?"
South Park (1997)
"What is it?"
South Park (1997)
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