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Clips from The Simpsons - $pringfield (or How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love Legalized Gambling) (S05E05)

"You people are the worst audience I've ever seen."
The Simpsons
"Well, you're the worst comedian we've ever seen!"
The Simpsons
"Oh, great! Well, we'll just sit here silently for the next 90 minutes."
The Simpsons
"They're all covered with filthy germs! Aren't they, Smithers?"
The Simpsons
"Why, what do you mean, sir?"
The Simpsons
"[ Marge Grunting ]"
The Simpsons
"Marge, you waited for me!"
The Simpsons
"- Okay, Marge. Let's go. - I'll catch up to you."
The Simpsons
"- Marge, I'm taking the car. - I'll walk."
The Simpsons
"- Marge-- - Go home! You're bad luck!"
The Simpsons
"Wait! I see what's happening here."
The Simpsons
"[ Grunting ]"
The Simpsons
"- Um-- - What?"
The Simpsons
"- Excuse me, ma'am. Don't you think you've gambled enough? - No!"
The Simpsons
"And she hasn't even started my costume for the geography pageant."
The Simpsons
"Turns out that Liza Minnelli impersonator was really Liza Minnelli."
The Simpsons
"- There's nothing to eat for breakfast! - You gotta improvise, Lisa."
The Simpsons
"- Mmm! - Maybe Mom just doesn't realize we miss her."
The Simpsons
"We could go down to the casino and let her know."
The Simpsons
"Aw, come on, Lisa. There's no reason to--"
The Simpsons
"Marge, we need to talk."
The Simpsons
"You're spending too much time at the casino, and I think you may have a problem."
The Simpsons
"Whoo-hoo! Problem solved!"
The Simpsons
"from New York's Idlewild Airport to the Belgian Congo in 1 7 minutes!"
The Simpsons
"- I just had a bad dream. - Oh, sure."
The Simpsons
"You just lie down and tell me all about it."
The Simpsons
"You nail the windows shut. I'll get the gun."
The Simpsons
"[ Tires Screeching ]"
The Simpsons
"-Just a little incident involving the bogeyman! - [ Gunshot ]"
The Simpsons
"None of this would have happened if you had been here to keep me from acting stupid!"
The Simpsons
"I'll be around more from now on."
The Simpsons
"Does this mean you'll help me with my costume?"
The Simpsons
"Oh, sure, honey. I promise."
The Simpsons
"Aw,just like on TV."
The Simpsons
"Hi. You from the casino?"
The Simpsons
"- I'm from a casino. - Good enough. Let's go."
The Simpsons
"I'm afraid Robert Goulet hasn't arrived yet, sir."
The Simpsons
"Hmm. Very well. Begin the thawing ofJim Nabors."
The Simpsons
"Are you sure this is the casino?"
The Simpsons
"I think I should call my manager."
The Simpsons
"Your manager says for you to shut up!"
The Simpsons
"Vera said that? Huh."
The Simpsons
"Dad! Mom said she'd be home to help me with my costume."
The Simpsons
"It's just that she has a career now."
The Simpsons
"She's a slot jockey."
The Simpsons
"But if I don't show up in a rubber suit shaped like the state of Florida..."
The Simpsons
"I'll be the laughingstock of the whole school."
The Simpsons
"First I have to drive your pregnant mother to the hospital..."
The Simpsons
"so she can give birth to you, and now this!"
The Simpsons
"- Dad! - [ Chuckling ] Oh, yeah. The costume."
The Simpsons
"Hello, ''Floreda''!"
The Simpsons
"I'm a monster! [ Sobbing ]"
The Simpsons
"No, Lisa. The only monster here is the gambling monster..."
The Simpsons
"that has enslaved your mother!"
The Simpsons
"- [ Yells ] - Double stars! Everybody wins!"
The Simpsons
"Yea!"
The Simpsons
"- [ Grunting ] - Hey!"
The Simpsons
"- Seven. Lucky seven! - Yea!"
The Simpsons
"- Yeah-- Ooh! - He can't talk now."
The Simpsons
"[ Grunting ]"
The Simpsons
"Marge?"
The Simpsons
"- Hey! - Smithers..."
The Simpsons
"I don't want that unpredictable lunatic working in my casino."
The Simpsons
"Fine. We'll transfer him to the nuclear plant, sir."
The Simpsons
"Oh, my beloved plant. How I miss her."
The Simpsons
"- And, uh, the jars of urine? - Oh, we'll hang on to those."
The Simpsons
"Now, to the plant! We'll take the Spruce Moose!"
The Simpsons
"[ Shouting Incoherently ]"
The Simpsons
"Yer getta ferda redda oura."
The Simpsons
"Think before you say each word."
The Simpsons
"- You broke a promise to your child. - What?"
The Simpsons
"You promised Lisa to help her with her costume."
The Simpsons
"You made her cry. Then I cried."
The Simpsons
"Maybe I should get some professional help."
The Simpsons
"No, no! That's too expensive. Just don't do it anymore."
The Simpsons
""[Jazz Intro ]"
The Simpsons
""Jingle bells Batman smells ""
The Simpsons
"Thank you! Thank you very much."
The Simpsons
"- Ow! - Oh, I'm sorry, kid."
The Simpsons
"And special awards go to the two students..."
The Simpsons
"- I'm Idaho! - Yes, of course you are."
The Simpsons
"I can finally look down my nose at you."
The Simpsons
"You have a gambling problem!"
The Simpsons
"Oh, sure!"
The Simpsons
"Remember when I got caught stealing all those watches from Sears?"
The Simpsons
"- [ Groans ] - Well, that's nothing, because you have a gambling problem!"
The Simpsons
"And remember when I let that escaped lunatic in the house..."
The Simpsons
"- [ Groans ] - Well, you have a gambling problem!"
The Simpsons
"Homer, when you forgive someone you can't throw it back at them like that."
The Simpsons
"- Mmm. - Remember when I--"
The Simpsons
"- [ Whistle Blowing ] - [ Screaming ]"
The Simpsons
"one of America's 400 fastest growing cities.!"
The Simpsons
"[ Tires Screeching, Car Crashing ]"
The Simpsons
"[ Siren Wailing, Gunshots ]"
The Simpsons
"Got any spare change, man?"
The Simpsons
"is equal to the square root of the remaining side."
The Simpsons
"- I'll survive this. - Even so, sir. We could stand to lay off a few employees."
The Simpsons
"- People! People! Let's be a little more realistic. - [ Snoring Continues ]"
The Simpsons
"with, uh, legalized gambling."
The Simpsons
"[ Murmuring Excitedly ]"
The Simpsons
"[ Panting ]"
The Simpsons
"Fresh from the streets of Sussex they are! [ Clicks Tongue ]"
The Simpsons
"the likes of which ye have never seen."
The Simpsons
"Mom, we're having a geography pageant at school..."
The Simpsons
"We got more gongs than the break-dancing robot that caught on fire."
The Simpsons
"Welcome to Mr. Burns Casino."
The Simpsons
"- Hey! I said bug off!. - [ Whimpers ]"
The Simpsons
"Ow! Ooh! Ow! Ooh!"
The Simpsons
"A round of applause please for Anastasia!"
The Simpsons
"Whoo-hoo!Jackpot."
The Simpsons
"Whoa, Marge! You gotta watch out."
The Simpsons
"Man, that's classic compulsive behavior."
The Simpsons
"- This late? Through the bad neighborhood? - Yeah."
The Simpsons
"Let's go see Mom."
The Simpsons
"- That's quite a nice model, sir. - Model?"
The Simpsons
"- Thanks, Mom. - Mmm."
The Simpsons
"[ Grunting ]"
The Simpsons
"Oh, it's always something, isn't it?"
The Simpsons
"Ow, ow, ow, ow."
The Simpsons
"Damn this casino!"
The Simpsons
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