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Clips from Family Guy - Road to the North Pole (S09E09)

"All right, let's go to the North Pole."
Family Guy
"And so Brian and Stewie set off on the road to the North Pole."
Family Guy
"instead of one of those fake cartoony ones?"
Family Guy
"We're gonna need another pair of pants..."
Family Guy
"Hey, Stewie, wake up."
Family Guy
"We're here. We're at the North Pole."
Family Guy
"Oh, uh. What? What? What? Uh, North Pole?"
Family Guy
"North Pole! North Pole!"
Family Guy
"There it is!"
Family Guy
"Ah, look at this."
Family Guy
"The tip of the Earth, Brian."
Family Guy
"Okay, let's go see Santa Claus."
Family Guy
"All right, let's go."
Family Guy
"Well, this is rather festive, isn't it?"
Family Guy
"Small."
Family Guy
"Well, it has to be small because of all the tiny elves."
Family Guy
"Ah, that's right."
Family Guy
"Good. Good point. Elves."
Family Guy
"Yo, yo, what's up, y'alls?"
Family Guy
"Y'alls ready to kick it in some fine North Pole gear?"
Family Guy
"Brian, why does the North Pole have black teenagers?"
Family Guy
"Ah, of course. All right."
Family Guy
"Well, uh, I just have one more question, then."
Family Guy
"Do you think I'm an idiot?! Huh? Do you?"
Family Guy
"Look, Stewie, the North Pole is a long and dangerous..."
Family Guy
"There is a Ferris wheel here, and a guy hosing vomit!"
Family Guy
"Except for Santa's wife"
Family Guy
"- because she has an eating disorder! - What?"
Family Guy
"Stewie, just pull yourself together."
Family Guy
"I won't, Brian!"
Family Guy
"Now you get your ass back into that hippie car of yours"
Family Guy
"and take me to the North Pole now!"
Family Guy
"Look, I know you're upset,"
Family Guy
"but why... Why don't you just sit down,"
Family Guy
"write out your Christmas list,"
Family Guy
"and I promise I will mail it to Santa Claus?"
Family Guy
"Screw that."
Family Guy
"This was never about Christmas presents, Brian."
Family Guy
"Well, then why do you want to go all the way to the North Pole?"
Family Guy
"Because... I'm going to kill Santa Claus!"
Family Guy
"So it turned out Stewie was determined to kill Santa Claus."
Family Guy
"Would he succeed?"
Family Guy
"Well, let's find out."
Family Guy
"Wait a minute, why the hell do you want to kill Santa?"
Family Guy
"Because that fat bastard blew me off at the mall,"
Family Guy
"and he shall not go unpunished."
Family Guy
"Now, let's go. I've got it all planned out."
Family Guy
"I'm gonna see the workshop, pet a few reindeer,"
Family Guy
"and then I'm gonna blow his brains out,"
Family Guy
"hopefully with his bitch wife watching."
Family Guy
"This is ridiculous... We are not going to the North Pole."
Family Guy
"- Why not? - Because there's no such..."
Family Guy
"Because when you get there, you may find out"
Family Guy
"it isn't what you thought it was,"
Family Guy
"and I wouldn't want you to be disappointed."
Family Guy
"That's it? That's your reason?"
Family Guy
"Because you've got a negative attitude."
Family Guy
"Like Eeyore."
Family Guy
"Why are you always in such a bad mood?"
Family Guy
"a negative attitude. I just..."
Family Guy
"Say yes to life, Brian!"
Family Guy
"I'll be home for Christmas."
Family Guy
"Son of a bitch!"
Family Guy
"So, what are we hauling, good buddy?"
Family Guy
"Oh, I got a flock of birds"
Family Guy
"that were too tired to fly back north."
Family Guy
"Boy, this is the way to do it, huh, Jerry?"
Family Guy
"Sure is. Think this makes us lazy?"
Family Guy
"What is this? This is a weird gun."
Family Guy
"Yeah. Don't touch that."
Family Guy
"Maybe you should put that back."
Family Guy
"Oh, my God, Stewie, you all right?"
Family Guy
"What the hell happened?"
Family Guy
"I could have been killed!"
Family Guy
"Look at my car!"
Family Guy
"to the real North Pole to see Santa,"
Family Guy
"none of this would have happened!"
Family Guy
"Wh... Wh... What is this? What are you doing?"
Family Guy
"Hitching a ride."
Family Guy
"I'm gonna keep heading north until I find Santa."
Family Guy
"You do what you want, Brian,"
Family Guy
"but I am going to the North Pole"
Family Guy
"and I'm gonna kill that bastard!"
Family Guy
"Stewie, you're putting me in a hell of a position here,"
Family Guy
"but I have no choice."
Family Guy
"because he doesn't exist."
Family Guy
"R... R... Really, Brian?"
Family Guy
"He doesn't exist?"
Family Guy
"That's right, he's not real."
Family Guy
"Oh, interesting. Interesting theory, Brian."
Family Guy
"Um, who else isn't real, hmm?"
Family Guy
"You gonna tell me that Elmo isn't real?"
Family Guy
"Is... Is SpongeBob not there at the bottom of the ocean"
Family Guy
"giving Squidward the business? Hmm?"
Family Guy
"And what about Curious George?"
Family Guy
"Huh? Does he not really exist? Hmm?"
Family Guy
"Is Curious George not really out there"
Family Guy
"making little boats out of newspapers"
Family Guy
"that he should be delivering? Huh?"
Family Guy
"Educate yourself, you fool."
Family Guy
"Look, Stewie, if you'd just listen for a sec..."
Family Guy
"No, you listen, Brian!"
Family Guy
"I'll tell you what, you take me to the North Pole,"
Family Guy
"and if Santa isn't there, I'll do something for you."
Family Guy
"- What? - When Lois does that"
Family Guy
"middle-of-the-night feeding"
Family Guy
"where she doesn't even open her eyes or really wake up,"
Family Guy
"I'll let you take that one for me, Brian."
Family Guy
"- Are you serious? - Quite."
Family Guy
"Okay, you got a deal."
Family Guy
"Damn it, it won't turn over."
Family Guy
"Great! Not even halfway through Canada, and we're stuck."
Family Guy
"Oh, hey there."
Family Guy
"You having some car troubles, eh?"
Family Guy
"Yeah, we're trying to get to the North Pole."
Family Guy
"- I don't suppose you're from Triple A, are you? - Who?"
Family Guy
"Triple A, you know? AAA."
Family Guy
"Yeah, that's what I said... AA, eh?"
Family Guy
"Oh, so you are with Triple A?"
Family Guy
"Oh, no, that's AAA. I just came from AA, eh?"
Family Guy
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