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Clips from South Park - Tonsil Trouble (S12E12)

"Well, I don't know if I should be helping you make Kyle look silly."
South Park
"Butters, helping people who have AIDS"
South Park
"is one of the most important things you can do."
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"I'm not just sure, Butters."
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"I'm HIV positive."
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"Wow! You really know what you're doing."
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"You think HIV is something to be laughed at, Kyle?"
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"Well, let's just see how funny it is now, asshole."
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"Ugh... what?"
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"There, there, boobie. You'll be okay."
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"Oh, doctor, did you find anything? Is it Strep?"
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"No, it isn't Strep."
South Park
"Oh, well, that's a relief."
South Park
"Mrs. Broflovski, has your son ever had a blood transfusion?"
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"No, why?"
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"Little boy, have you been having unprotected anal sex?"
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"What? No!"
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"Doctor, what are you saying?"
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"We've run every test imaginable."
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"Little Kyle here is infected with HIV."
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"- What? - HIV?"
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"It took us a long time to narrow it down,"
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"but there is no doubt."
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"No! That's impossible!"
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"Little boy, are you sure you haven't taken it"
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"up the hoo-hoo just once or twice?"
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"No! No, goddammit, No!"
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"I'm telling you you're wrong!"
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"That son of a bitch!"
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"Kyle? Kyle!"
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"Pass me the ball, Craig, you stupid asshole!"
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"Kyle, what the F?"
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"Kyle, what?"
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"What'd he do?"
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"Why do I have HIV?"
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"Oh."
South Park
"Oh, you have HIV, huh, Kyle?"
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"Guess it isn't so funny now, is it?"
South Park
"Then why did Butters say he helped you sneak into my room last Friday night?"
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"Do you know how serious this is?"
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"Well, Kyle, maybe I was just trying"
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"to prove a point that you shouldn't be so--"
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"Kyle!"
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"Break it up, m'kay?"
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"Break it up!"
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"All right, boys."
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"Now what is this fighting all about?"
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"He gave me AIDS!"
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"What?"
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"Is that true, Eric? Did you give Kyle AIDS?"
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"and then he's a big tattle tail and going around talking crap about me..."
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"Did you infect Kyle with the HIV virus?"
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"Yes or no?"
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"You cannot purposely infect other kids with your disease."
South Park
"That's right."
South Park
"I think you owe Kyle an apology."
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"I'm sorry."
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"An apology?"
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"You're sorry for what, Eric?"
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"I'm sorry for giving you AIDS, Kyle."
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"That's better."
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"And now, Kyle, maybe you should also admit"
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"you were wrong for tattling."
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"What?"
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"M'kay, because nobody likes a tattle tail, m'kay."
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"A tattle tail? He infected me with AIDS!"
South Park
"See? He's tattling again."
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"Well, Kyle, I guess we're even now."
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"Kyle, should we call it even-stevens now?"
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"I'm going to break everything that you own."
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"I apologized, Kyle!"
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"Kyle!"
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"Kyle, hold on, you asshole."
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"What the fuck are you doing?"
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"No! Ah, Clyde Frog!"
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"No, no, not the X-Box, Kyle."
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"Not the X-- Wait, just wait a second!"
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"I'm sorry I gave you HIV, alright?"
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"Just give me a chance and I can cure you."
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"There is no cure, you asshole!"
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"No! No, listen, Kyle."
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"I'm onto something."
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"There really is hope."
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"You're lying."
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"No! All right, Kyle. Magic Johnson, Kyle!"
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"The key is Magic Johnson!"
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"Magic Johnson?"
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"He was a basketball player."
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"So he got HIV like 50 years ago."
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"And he's still totally fine."
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"Magic Johnson has some kind of resistance to the virus, Kyle."
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"I've been researching it since I got infected."
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"we have a chance of beating this thing, buddy."
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"You and me, Kyle."
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"We can overcome our illness. I swear it to you!"
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"You better."
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"Because if you don't the cure for HIV, I will break your X-Box."
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"My God."
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"That would be $400 each."
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"Uh, sir, you don't understand."
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"We have to see Magic Johnson right away."
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"You see... We have AIDS."
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"AIDS?"
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"But I'm sorry."
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"I can't just give away free seats."
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"Don't you get it?"
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"We are two pals, afflicted with an illness"
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"and who only have each other in a race against time!"
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"Innocent, playful children who were stricken"
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"Oh, you boys are like that, huh?"
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"Are you sure you boys just don't have any cash?"
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"We're not just sure, we're HIV positive."
South Park
"Uh, we sometimes offer free seats to cancer patients,"
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"but AIDS, I just... Hey, Mitch?"
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"Do we have any AIDS patient policies?"
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"Forget it, all right!"
South Park
"We're so happy to help accommodate you brave boys."
South Park
"What kind of cancer did you say you have again?"
South Park
"Oh, uh, you know, all-over cancer."
South Park
"I'm so sorry."
South Park
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