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Clips from Gravity Falls - Stanchurian Candidate (S02E02)

"to listing Stan's crimes."
Gravity Falls
"Maybe it's for the best."
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"I got close to the dream, though, kids."
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"Hey, I knit you something."
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"Grunkle Stan, are you crying?"
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"I got campaign confetti in my eye."
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"All right, Stan."
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"Another day, another random body pain."
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"Here we go."
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"Uhh!"
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"so I used your slippers. Love, Mabel."
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"Sorry! Dipper."
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"Whoa, let's not take this line."
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"- There's an old person in it. - Pshht!"
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"Hey! For your information,"
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"I was gonna shoplift most of this!"
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"Aw, seriously?"
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"Ahh. Rough start to a day,"
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"but it's all gonna be worth it"
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"Does everyone see this?"
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"This is what a hero looks like right here."
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"I thought we were out of light bulbs."
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"Oh, we were. So I invented my own."
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"It will last a thousand years,"
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"- Oh! - Never have I known such softness."
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"Anyway, where were you?"
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"in actual adult prison."
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"in the deceased mayor's honor."
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"I'm sorry. It's just been so long since we've had real news."
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"There will be a Town Hall meeting this afternoon"
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"to discuss replacing him."
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"According to the town charter,"
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"- Wait. Bud Gleeful? - He looks good,"
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"considering we threw his son in jail."
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"its fair share of whoopsie-daisies in the past,"
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"my candidacy for the mayor of Gravity Falls!"
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"Yes. Are you still in contact with Little Gideon?"
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"I'm giving you fifty percent off a used car."
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"you get half off a used car... - Better than cash!"
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"Guys, I've got a really bad feeling"
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"about Bud Gleeful as mayor."
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"I don't know, dude, it's not like we have"
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"Everyone in this town is a tad strange,"
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"except, ironically, Tad Strange."
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"Hi, guys. Tad's the name, and being normal's my game."
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"It's a shame Ford isn't here."
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"and be a great mayor."
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"I'll just take the oath of office now,"
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"Oh, yeah? Well, your face is more fat than... not fat!"
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"Oh, snap."
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"What do you say folks?"
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"Well, looks like we got some competition here, folks."
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"I was gonna let bygones be bygones, Stan,"
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"you might not like the Gravity Falls you wake up in."
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"Hee hee hee hee!"
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"Let the madness begin!"
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"Did I-- Did I not make that clear?"
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"it's just... - No, no, it's okay, Mabel."
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"We don't think you can do it."
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"Look, kids, the mayor kicking the bucket got me thinking."
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"I'm an old man and I'm not getting any younger."
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"My dumb brother's research is probably gonna make him famous,"
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"Do I really want "crooked grifter" on my tombstone?"
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"How about "crooked mayor"?"
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"I know Stan isn't the best candidate--"
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"Spread the word, pig."
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"All right, everybody, eyes up here."
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"Okay, Gravity Falls elections are based on two events:"
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"the Wednesday Stump Speech, held on an actual stump,"
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"At the end, they release a Freedom Eagle,"
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"and bestow a birdly kiss upon him,"
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"I couldn't make this up if I wanted to."
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"You're listening to Falls Radio,"
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"Candidate Stan, first question:"
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"How do you feel about the American flag?"
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"Too many stripes. Next question?"
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"What would you do to help educate our kids?"
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"Heh! Simple. Put 'em on an island"
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"and make 'em fight for dominance."
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"Also teach kids swears."
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"Wait. Do you mean crime in general,"
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"Okay, interview's over."
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"Your approval rating started at zero."
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"and you're black licorice."
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"It's not that you're unsniffable,"
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"you just need to learn when to keep the cap on."
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"From now on, maybe you should just read our prepared remarks."
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"Heh heh! Sorry, kids."
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"If my head says, "That lady's got an ugly baby,""
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"Hmm. It's a shame there isn't some device"
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"Oh, wait. Of course."
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"for Ronald Reagan's masters."
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"Just get Stan to wear this and you can make him a literal talking head."
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"As long as you wear the matching one,"
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"Thank you, Great Uncle Ford!"
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"Whoa, thanks for the slammin' tie, dudes."
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"These stripes are so slimming."
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"Flip the switch and test it out."
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"♪ I got some fancy moves and a bad attitude ♪"
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"Ohh!"
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"Ha! That's amazing!"
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"Guys! Something weird just happened. I'm really freaked out!"
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"Oh, my gosh!"
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"Education? Git it!"
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"Grunkle Stan, just trust your lucky tie."
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"You're on, Grunkle Stan!"
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"Okay, we'll only jump in if he starts doing badly."
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"you ladies all look great."
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"That is exactly what I needed to hear right now!"
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"- Whew! - I'm Stan Pines."
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"in that elementary school a few years back."
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"But I believe in things."
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"Good. He's saying all the right things."
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"but if you want a candidate that will listen to you,"
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"♪ Oh, yeah"
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"Uhh!"
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"Uh, I don't know."
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"I just opened my mouth and spoke from the heart."
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"What is that sound?"
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"Why are people jamming their hands together?"
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