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Clips from BoJack Horseman - A Safe Space (S03E03)

"First thing is we gotta get her out of town before she starts to show."
BoJack Horseman
"Film a bunch of music videos now, and then--"
BoJack Horseman
"Then when she comes back, we'll say she adopted a baby."
BoJack Horseman
"Boxer vs. Raptor, ♪ Na-na na-na na-na na-na! ♪"
BoJack Horseman
"...fucker!"
BoJack Horseman
"We always agreed we didn't want kids, unless--"
BoJack Horseman
"A streetwise but soulful teen needed somewhere to live"
BoJack Horseman
"as he waited for his Juilliard audition."
BoJack Horseman
"We'd support his dancing and let him stay in the guest room, right."
BoJack Horseman
"-But a baby? Are you--? -It's not about me."
BoJack Horseman
"but that's the "U" that's in "us," so I already said that "U.""
BoJack Horseman
"The point is, I'm going to be here for you, 24/7."
BoJack Horseman
"Two hundred and forty-seven percent, that's how "there for you" I'll be."
BoJack Horseman
"Definitely. This is a conversation."
BoJack Horseman
"Let's both say what we want at the same time on three."
BoJack Horseman
"On three or after three?"
BoJack Horseman
"-Okay. Okay. -One, two, three..."
BoJack Horseman
"-Abortion. -Get an abortion."
BoJack Horseman
"♪♪"
BoJack Horseman
"[host] The Oscar race is heating up,"
BoJack Horseman
"and all the hot stars came out to sizzle"
BoJack Horseman
"Mitt Dermon for Midnight Hole..."
BoJack Horseman
"Bread Poot for City Of AIDS..."
BoJack Horseman
"Jurj Clooners for The Nazi Who Played Yahtzee..."
BoJack Horseman
"and BoJack Horseman for Secretariat."
BoJack Horseman
"-Oh, my goodness. -[cheering]"
BoJack Horseman
"You have to be kidding me."
BoJack Horseman
"Don't worry, they'll call your name next time."
BoJack Horseman
"My clients have won Oscars nine out of the last ten years."
BoJack Horseman
"you wouldn't exactly brag about that in your commercial."
BoJack Horseman
"-Diane, Diane, Diane. -I'm doing my job, BoJack."
BoJack Horseman
"Young people and their phones."
BoJack Horseman
"There could be a beautiful rainbow in this room right now"
BoJack Horseman
"Can you look at rainbows on your phone?"
BoJack Horseman
"Shut up, BoJack."
BoJack Horseman
"-[phone pinging] -Shit."
BoJack Horseman
"I just tweeted "Shut up, BoJack," as Cynthia Nixon."
BoJack Horseman
"I'd buy it. She is not a fan, and for good reason."
BoJack Horseman
"-What's up your butt tonight? -You really wanna know?"
BoJack Horseman
"I would seriously like to know what crawled up your butt,"
BoJack Horseman
"made a home for itself in your butt,"
BoJack Horseman
"I'm getting an abortion."
BoJack Horseman
"Whoa, that takes me back."
BoJack Horseman
"I had more than my share of abortions in the '90s."
BoJack Horseman
"I really hope all those women actually got the abortions,"
BoJack Horseman
"and didn't just keep my money."
BoJack Horseman
"Diane, are you tweeting for pop starlet Sextina Aquafina right now?"
BoJack Horseman
"I'm trying to. Why?"
BoJack Horseman
"What? No--"
BoJack Horseman
"The tweet heard round the world."
BoJack Horseman
"Sextina Aquafina says, "I'm getting an abortion.""
BoJack Horseman
"If it's happening, we're gonna talk about it."
BoJack Horseman
"Is Twitter an appropriate forum"
BoJack Horseman
"to be discussing a sensitive issue like abortion?"
BoJack Horseman
"Randy, don't look at Jessica. This is on you."
BoJack Horseman
"Diane, VIM is hanging on by a thread and only barely scraping by"
BoJack Horseman
"because of clients like Sextina."
BoJack Horseman
"Great investment. We are not on the edge of complete ruin."
BoJack Horseman
"We are on the edge of complete ruin."
BoJack Horseman
"I think if I explain it to her and apologize, she'll understand."
BoJack Horseman
"Because she's so understanding? This is a teenage pop star."
BoJack Horseman
"Literally the two least compassionate entities"
BoJack Horseman
"combined into the supernova of not understanding"
BoJack Horseman
"-that is Sextina Aquafina. -[elevator dings]"
BoJack Horseman
"when I'm in the middle of a performance for Gaddafi's cousin on his yacht"
BoJack Horseman
"and I'm in a giant champagne flute singing "Left Titty""
BoJack Horseman
"because I am apparently aborting a baby I do not have."
BoJack Horseman
"So I had them turn their boat into a car and drive me here to fire someone."
BoJack Horseman
"-I think that's me. -Great. You're fired, Glasses."
BoJack Horseman
"I'll put out a statement explaining the whole mess. I am so sorry."
BoJack Horseman
"Taylor Swift just tweeted that you were "brave.""
BoJack Horseman
"Nicki Minaj tweeted at you a face with heart eyes."
BoJack Horseman
"who should have had abortions like Sextina."
BoJack Horseman
"-You're trending like crazy. -I'm trending?"
BoJack Horseman
"It would be, if you were actually getting an abortion."
BoJack Horseman
"Well, no, because you're not."
BoJack Horseman
"Yeah, but if you did, this would make you a cultural icon."
BoJack Horseman
"Glasses, you're un-fired. I'm getting an abortion."
BoJack Horseman
"-Well... -I gotta go on talk shows."
BoJack Horseman
"If I can make one woman feel a little less alone,"
BoJack Horseman
"Um..."
BoJack Horseman
"-Diane, take the yes. -Okay."
BoJack Horseman
"Sextina Aquafina, you are now the face of the pro-choice movement."
BoJack Horseman
"-Now let's get you informed. -Hey! Uh, what?"
BoJack Horseman
"you'll need to look at an ultrasound and listen to the heartbeat."
BoJack Horseman
"Or heartbeats, if you're having a litter."
BoJack Horseman
"It's the law. Also, by law, I have to tell you that at one month,"
BoJack Horseman
"your puppies have a favorite color and that color may be blue."
BoJack Horseman
"-That can't be true. -By law, I have to tell you that."
BoJack Horseman
"you'll need to watch 20 hours of cute puppy videos"
BoJack Horseman
"as Sarah McLachlan's "I Will Remember You" plays softly."
BoJack Horseman
"Don't worry, Diane, I will watch the cute puppy videos for you."
BoJack Horseman
"-It's a sacrifice I'm willing to make. -No, she has to watch the videos."
BoJack Horseman
"Don't worry, Diane, we will watch the cute puppy videos together."
BoJack Horseman
"Tomorrow, our exclusive interview with the irrepressible provocateuse"
BoJack Horseman
"Sextina Aquafina."
BoJack Horseman
"But first, one thing that isn't being aborted: the road to Oscar."
BoJack Horseman
"Tonight, the Leonard Maltin Awards."
BoJack Horseman
"Handing out trophies to all the performances this year"
BoJack Horseman
"And the Malty for Pretty Good Actor goes to Bread Poot."
BoJack Horseman
"-[applause] -Whoo!"
BoJack Horseman
"No, I just meant because of thirst."
BoJack Horseman
"I could use a scotch."
BoJack Horseman
"Oh, look. Jurj Clooners."
BoJack Horseman
"Hey, how are you? Thank you."
BoJack Horseman
"Jurj sucks. What does everyone love about him?"
BoJack Horseman
"Sure sounds like God."
BoJack Horseman
"-Jurj, hey, man. -BoJack, right?"
BoJack Horseman
"Yeah, good to see you."
BoJack Horseman
"Hey, Jurj, my name's Todd, and my friend Keith sleeps on your couch."
BoJack Horseman
"That is so Keith."
BoJack Horseman
"Todd, why don't you do the grown-ups a favor and go find your own shadow?"
BoJack Horseman
"You know, I don't think of him as a war criminal."
BoJack Horseman
"I just think of him as a person who had a funny accent."
BoJack Horseman
"Totally. I think I'm getting the hang of all this now."
BoJack Horseman
"Yikes. Look, man, you're not gonna be next."
BoJack Horseman
"This will sound dumb coming out of my mouth, but it's true."
BoJack Horseman
"So Jurj, Bread, Mitt, those are names. Like real names."
BoJack Horseman
"Lernernerner DiCarpricorn, that's a name."
BoJack Horseman
"You're the Fifth Man. You get it, right?"
BoJack Horseman
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