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Clips from How I Met Your Mother (2005) - Romance (S02E02)

"Just please don't tell anyone about this."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Okay."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Dude, your hand is monstrous."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Yeah, well, what'd you expect? You've seen my penis."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I can't believe you told us Robin's secret."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"What? How could I keep something like that to myself?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And you begged me to tell you."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"No, I didn't."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Please tell us. Just tell us. I'm begging you."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Yeah, well, you still shouldn't have told us."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"See that's just it, I'm not the boyfriend."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'm the mistress."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"No, not the mistress."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"The master. What do you call it?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Uh, pretty sure we're going to call it mistress."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Do I ask her to get a divorce?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Ted, even if she is married, it's a Canadian marriage."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Nobody takes it seriously."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"for longer than five years, technically, you're no longer married."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I can check it out at the law library at school."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I can see my hand print on your face."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Don't get too cocky, Slappy."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I just got a shipment of porn from Canada I have to go through."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I won the bet. Why are you still searching?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Just because you were right doesn't mean I'm wrong."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Canadian porn."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"doesn't cover breast implants."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"If I have to sit through one more flat-chested Nova Scotian"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"riding a Mountie on the back of a Zamboni"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'll go out of my mind."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Hey. - Hey."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Listen, dude, I got to talk to you,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"but you got to promise me that you won't tell Barney."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Fine, I won't tell Barney. What is it?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Robin's not married. - What?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Why would she tell me she was?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I don't know, but I cross- checked every record in Canada."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"There's no record of her ever being married."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"There must be some mistake."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I promise you. She's not married."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"She's not great at parking legally either."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"So she lied to me? W--What am I going to do?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I-I can't confront her, 'cause then she'll know I told you."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"maybe make her feel guilty, whatever it takes"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"to get a confession out of her."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Thanks for telling me your secret."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"God, what's the word I'm looking for?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Honest."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Yeah. You know what's probably the best part about your honesty?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"How truthful it is."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I say we just move on."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
""my girlfriend has a husband" thing,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"like what month did you get married?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"June. We had a June wedding."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Ah, Canada in June."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"That's the dream."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Well, it's... weird that you don't remember."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"because we did butlered hors d'oeuvres in the atrium,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"but the actual dinner was a buffet in the Food Court"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"featuring a filet mignon or a roasted potato-crusted salmon"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"with a lobster scallion beurre blanc."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Band or DJ?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"A string quartet played at the ceremony,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"but for the actual reception, we had a seven-piece band."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"We paid extra for the sax"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"'cause I just love that smooth alto sound."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Flowers? - Azaleas."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Color scheme? - Dusty rose and sienna."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Husband's name."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- No, you weren't. - How do you know?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I looked it up at the library."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- What library? - The one on Fifth."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- When did you go? - Today at lunch,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'm not questioning the lunch part, Ted."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"What database did you use?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I used the Canadian Mall Marriage 6000."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Fine, Marshall looked it up at school."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- You told Marshall?! - You lied to me!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"See, this is why I don't tell people secrets."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"You were supposed to be the one person I trusted the most"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Yeah, I was testing you and you failed."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And now you're never gonna know why I don't go to the mall."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"You were testing me? That's insane."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Oh, yeah? How long did it take for you to tell Marshall"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"my biggest secret in the world? Five minutes?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- That wasn't a real secret! - Yeah, but it could have been."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"No wonder your fake husband moved to Hong Kong."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"He moved there for business."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"You."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"You got something to say to me?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"What are you talking about?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I know Robin was never really married."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"How could you possibly know that?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Oh, let's see, uh, first I took the subway to school."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Then I got a bagel."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Then I went to the library and found out Robin was never married."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"but by the time I got down there, I wasn't even hungry anymore."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- You told him? - I had to."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'm Slap Bet Commissioner."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Believe me, this hurts me more than it's gonna hurt you."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Don't count on it. I've been practicing on a tree trunk."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"One because you lied and two for being prematurely slapped."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Three slaps."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"But--"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"You're gonna cry."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I just don't think it's healthy to keep big secrets in a relationship."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"My parents didn't really talk to each other for 30 years"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"and now they're divorced."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I have shared more of myself with you"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"than I've ever shared with anyone."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'm asking for this one secret,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"which has nothing to do with us, to just be mine."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"What are you talking about?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- What? - That's right."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I know your secret, Robin."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Because I know the truth,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"and I am about to show it to you right now."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Gather 'round, Ted, you're gonna want to see this."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Robin wants to keep this a secret, so..."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"it's gonna stay a secret."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
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