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Clips from Frasier - Call Me Irresponsible (S01E01)

"Poor Grammy. For weeks, she kept insisting: "'E's napping, 'e's napping.""
Frasier
"OK, I'm going to turn it on."
Frasier
"Oh, it's lovely!"
Frasier
"♪ Don we now our gay apparel"
Frasier
"♪ Fa-la-la-la-la, la-la-la-la... ♪"
Frasier
"- What picture? - The picture for the Christmas card."
Frasier
"The theme is Santa's workshop. Put on your little elf hats."
Frasier
"- Put the hat on! - You can't tell me what to do."
Frasier
"You can no longer sit me on top of some stupid old Packard!"
Frasier
"Boys, please, don't fight! Are you forgetting what day it is?"
Frasier
"It's October 21!"
Frasier
"Oh wait, where's Eddie?"
Frasier
"In the bathroom, getting a drink. Eddie!"
Frasier
"Well, I can always pray there's a postal strike."
Frasier
""Go out there and make it a great evening, Seattle.""
Frasier
"Oh! But not from the adorable ones."
Frasier
"That's certainly different from the usual "Best Regards"."
Frasier
"For once you'll face the consequences of hanging up on callers!"
Frasier
"What consequences?"
Frasier
"You damned radio shrinks. You couldn't just tell him to stick with it!"
Frasier
"That doesn't get big ratings. No! "Get on with your life and ruin hers.""
Frasier
"Did he mention he only stayed with you to keep his options open?"
Frasier
"He said he only stayed with you until somebody better came along."
Frasier
"- He said that? - To most of Seattle."
Frasier
"So, it wasn't that he didn't want to commit."
Frasier
"He just didn't want to commit to me."
Frasier
"Look, you're..."
Frasier
"You're in a place of business here."
Frasier
"Boy, I can really pick 'em, can't l?"
Frasier
"You're a terrifically attractive young woman, maybe a bit overemotional..."
Frasier
"Oh, yes, there, there, shh."
Frasier
"- Listen, can I get you something? - Mm-mm."
Frasier
"- A drink of water? - No."
Frasier
"when I brought a toothbrush over to keep at his apartment."
Frasier
"Listen, if he was that resistant, why did you stay with him?"
Frasier
"Why settle for someone who isn't madly in love with you?"
Frasier
"There are."
Frasier
"We both need to be loved and to love someone,"
Frasier
"we both want to feel that we matter to someone."
Frasier
"Wow. Your wife is really lucky."
Frasier
"Especially now that our marriage is over."
Frasier
"Relationships don't have to be hard."
Frasier
"I don't mind the happily-ever-after-part. It's the dating part."
Frasier
"If I have to tell one more stranger the story of my life"
Frasier
"over Northern Italian cuisine, I'll choke on a breadstick!"
Frasier
"I know. Maybe we could just exchange résumés over appetisers."
Frasier
"- I usually say goodbye over appetisers. - At least you're not stuck with the bill."
Frasier
"I can't do that."
Frasier
"so it feels like there's someone else there."
Frasier
"- You really see all that in my hand? - Mm-hm."
Frasier
"I'll send Dad and Daphne to the movies. I'll cook for you. Be at my place at 8:00."
Frasier
"I won't make it till 8:30. I must change."
Frasier
"No! Don't ever change. I like you just the way you are."
Frasier
"(Groans)"
Frasier
"Bye."
Frasier
"Who was that babe-o-rama?"
Frasier
"- Three days. - Have you two...?"
Frasier
"- No. As if it's any of your business. - But you're...?"
Frasier
"So... How did you two meet?"
Frasier
"She came down to the radio station to chew me out."
Frasier
"I advised him to break up with her."
Frasier
"Frasier, where are your ethics?"
Frasier
"I talked to him days before I met her."
Frasier
"Rationalisation, the last refuge of a..."
Frasier
"(Both talk at the same time)"
Frasier
"As long as your conscience is clear. Mine wouldn't be."
Frasier
"My car's in the shop. I need a ride home tonight."
Frasier
"Marco?"
Frasier
"The guy you got out of the way so you could keep his girlfriend."
Frasier
"- Ten seconds. - I'm not talking to him."
Frasier
"There's no way I'm talking to him!"
Frasier
"Three, two..."
Frasier
"Oops, we lost Todd."
Frasier
"'l spoke to you and I took your advice - I broke up with my girlfriend.'"
Frasier
"'and I saw her outside talking to some guy in a black BMW.'"
Frasier
"'Should I ask her to take me back?'"
Frasier
"No. Marco, you don't want your ex-girlfriend back -"
Frasier
"You must stop spying on her and get on with your life."
Frasier
"Borrow a page from my book: move to a new city. A new state."
Frasier
"Find out why everyone's talking about Pittsburgh!"
Frasier
"Just a few miles out of my way. At rush hour."
Frasier
"I just have one question for you."
Frasier
"That's an interesting question, Niles, and I don't care."
Frasier
"- You're insane! - Perhaps, but you just ran a stop sign."
Frasier
"I tell you, Niles, I haven't felt this way in ages."
Frasier
"You know what I'm talking about."
Frasier
"Whenever you approached a breach of ethics, you'd get queasy."
Frasier
"At least I didn't get spontaneous nosebleeds."
Frasier
"Remember when we lifted that dollar from Mom's purse,"
Frasier
"(Car horn)"
Frasier
"Mm, that was the best Salmon Marseille I've ever had."
Frasier
"You should try my Salmon "Enchanted Evening"."
Frasier
"- Tell me you didn't say that. - Oh, it was just the Lafite talking."
Frasier
"Lafite, don't fail me now!"
Frasier
"So...have you ever made love in the kitchen?"
Frasier
"(Plates shatter)"
Frasier
"Oh! Mm!"
Frasier
"(Both pant)"
Frasier
"(Catherine) 'What?'"
Frasier
"I'm sorry, I'm suddenly feeling a little queasy. I..."
Frasier
"Maybe I'm just not a kitchen person."
Frasier
"Well, uh..."
Frasier
"Maybe you're just... a little too warm, huh?"
Frasier
"Yeah, that's it."
Frasier
"Ooh!"
Frasier
"This is better."
Frasier
"Oh, yes. Mm..."
Frasier
"Ewww!"
Frasier
"Ah..."
Frasier
"I need some fresh air. Are you OK?"
Frasier
"There's a bug going round."
Frasier
"- It's not a bug. - What is it, then?"
Frasier
"Every time we touch and kiss, I get queasy."
Frasier
"The thought of making love to me makes you sick to your stomach?"
Frasier
"Yes, but don't take it personally."
Frasier
"Every time I come close to breaching my ethics, I get sick."
Frasier
"Marco called and said he wanted to get back with you."
Frasier
"Oh, Frasier!"
Frasier
"I have to. If I don't, I'll throw up all over your shoes."
Frasier
"I want to carry you to that Eames classic"
Frasier
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