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Clips from Scrubs - Our Histories (S09E09)

"And will you ever forget the excessive production of saliva"
Scrubs
"is a condition known as sialorrhea?"
Scrubs
"Who did this?"
Scrubs
"I was spending it with the love of my life."
Scrubs
"Long gone and took the kids."
Scrubs
"my very first thesaurus as a birthday present,"
Scrubs
"That means we don't even know when it ends."
Scrubs
"So many things to tear apart here."
Scrubs
"I'll focus on your delusion that you are still young."
Scrubs
"Let's face it, you're just like me."
Scrubs
"J. D: Is he psychic?"
Scrubs
"- But they're not my students. - Actually, they are."
Scrubs
"Because you're their faculty student advisor."
Scrubs
"(SINGING) Alabama"
Scrubs
"So bring your camera"
Scrubs
"GOOCH: Arkansas"
Scrubs
"(CRASHING)"
Scrubs
"I see with your wives out of town,"
Scrubs
"Boom, looks like the bassist and drummer from Nickelback"
Scrubs
"DENISE: That's not happening."
Scrubs
"with their life story before they kick it."
Scrubs
"It actually really matters."
Scrubs
"Now hold my pepper jack, please."
Scrubs
"BOTH: In the great state of Wyoming"
Scrubs
"Ted Buckland."
Scrubs
"(PHONE CLICKS)"
Scrubs
"maybe Dr. Dizzle, perhaps D to the lzzle."
Scrubs
"Let it be so!"
Scrubs
"(ALL HUMMING)"
Scrubs
"Super-done. My dude is dead."
Scrubs
"Peace, I gotta go drown my sorrows with a Jagerbomb."
Scrubs
"I'm not interested in answering"
Scrubs
"(SIGHS)"
Scrubs
"(DANCE MUSIC PLAYING)"
Scrubs
"CO X: Feel free to start with me."
Scrubs
"Great, I'll go talk to his liver and tell it to stop failing."
Scrubs
"We just dropped a knowledge bomb on your asses."
Scrubs
"Oh, no. It was actually Marilyn Montrose."
Scrubs
"That's not my drink. It's good, though."
Scrubs
"KELSO: Good night, Gooch."
Scrubs
"That's not relevant right now, it's just always on my mind."
Scrubs
"Yeah, that's the same."
Scrubs
"What're you guys still doing here?"
Scrubs
"Leave him! Every man for themselves!"
Scrubs
"Well, thank you, Lord."
Scrubs
"and I damn sure wouldn't have gotten this terrific screen saver."
Scrubs
"stop wearing ironic T-shirts and just let it happen."
Scrubs
"whether it's what we really wanna do on a big night out"
Scrubs
"(SOFT MUSIC PLAYING)"
Scrubs
"LUCY: Being in med school is kind of like being in basic training."
Scrubs
"And the professors are like drill sergeants."
Scrubs
"Some rule with an iron fist."
Scrubs
"Do you feel the spit raining down on your face, maggot?"
Scrubs
"Sialorrhea!"
Scrubs
"Sir, no, sir!"
Scrubs
"LUCY: Others carry a big stick."
Scrubs
"J. D: You want to become a doctor?"
Scrubs
"Well, you're gonna have to work."
Scrubs
"Work your little scrubs off."
Scrubs
"Is this the speech from Fame?"
Scrubs
"You want fame? Well, fame costs."
Scrubs
"LUCY: Our only hope for getting through it? Teamwork."
Scrubs
"Unfortunately, we all just looked out for ourselves."
Scrubs
"Cole, I need the retractor."
Scrubs
"Yeah, I don't like touching bread. Creeps me out."
Scrubs
"- Give him the stupid retractor. - What?"
Scrubs
"Give me my sandwich."
Scrubs
"If you wanna keep sleeping with me, I expect you to have my back."
Scrubs
"God, you've got so many rules."
Scrubs
"Get your back, listen to you when you talk,"
Scrubs
"stay out of your purse."
Scrubs
"Damn, girl, quit playing games."
Scrubs
"LUCY: At least the weekend was coming."
Scrubs
"We needed some fun, and Cole was throwing a party."
Scrubs
"BOTH: Fame."
Scrubs
"J. D: This weekend was gonna be amazing."
Scrubs
"- Elliot gone? - Gone. Carla?"
Scrubs
"Nice! Bro-A-Palooza has officially begun."
Scrubs
"We're not calling it Bro-A-Palooza."
Scrubs
"Why not? I already made T-shirts."
Scrubs
"That's awesome. Where's mine?"
Scrubs
"I've decided to no longer refer to you two as pathetic."
Scrubs
"Thanks, Perry."
Scrubs
"Instead, since my nephew gave me"
Scrubs
"I'm going to allow you to choose from the following, if you will."
Scrubs
""Miserable, pitiful, sorry, wretched, deplorable, regrettable or sad.""
Scrubs
""Wretched" sounds like Dickens. We'll go with "wretched.""
Scrubs
"No, it's just Old Man doesn't understand two young guns"
Scrubs
"(MIMICS GUNSHOTS)"
Scrubs
"Out on the town."
Scrubs
"He doesn't get Bro-A-Palooza."
Scrubs
"8:00 p.m. To question mark."
Scrubs
"You're both much closer to 40 than you are 20."
Scrubs
"Old, tired and you gotta get up a lot at night to take a pee."
Scrubs
"Hey, Field Hockey, your med students are acting like animals."
Scrubs
"(ALL GROWLING)"
Scrubs
"You think licking will stop me? I've eaten out of dumpsters."
Scrubs
"- They're not my med students. - They are,"
Scrubs
"because you are their faculty advisor."
Scrubs
"You will advise them to start working together like a team."
Scrubs
"And even more importantly, you will teach them to never,"
Scrubs
"ever again lay their grubby paws on my glazed donut."
Scrubs
"It is the one sprinkled, sugary beacon of light left in my life."
Scrubs
"So you will advise them that if they wanna get through med school,"
Scrubs
"they have to work together."
Scrubs
"And don't touch donuts, they're beacons of light. Or whatever."
Scrubs
"When did I become the student advisor?"
Scrubs
"When you slept with the faculty advisor."
Scrubs
"Your mom's the faculty advisor?"
Scrubs
"Really?"
Scrubs
"- Yeah, you guys coming to my party? - LUCY: Yes."
Scrubs
"I cannot wait to wear a dress"
Scrubs
"and have a reason to actually shave again."
Scrubs
"It is like the friggin' Amazon down there."
Scrubs
"LUCY: Too far, too far. Too far."
Scrubs
"Gonna be nuts to butts up in that piece. Big ol' wrangle-dangle."
Scrubs
"Yeah, you're making it sound horrible, but I'm still gonna go."
Scrubs
"I need to have some fun."
Scrubs
"I've spent the last three weekends finishing up community service."
Scrubs
"Hey, I'm sorry. I was under the impression"
Scrubs
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