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Clips from The Office - Michael's Birthday (S02E02)

"How old are you? I hate you."
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"Honestly, is there any way you can get on your fiancee's plan?"
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"Our health plan is terrible."
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"Here you are. Good news. Did some research."
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"It turns out that 98% of people with skin cancer fully recover."
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"It's still scary."
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"and it shouldn't stop us from having fun."
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"You know what they say the best medicine is?"
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"Well the doctor said a combination of interferon and Dacarbazine."
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"I don't really think people are in the laughing mood."
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"I didn't even invite you to my birthday party."
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"I work here. I work here."
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"All right. Well, you know what? Since Toby doesn't speak for everybody,"
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"and I am your boss, I think you should just go home."
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"Well, you're pretty much driving everybody else here crazy."
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"Crazy with worry."
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"And don't say the bathroom, because I kicked in all the stalls."
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"Well, that's an invasion of privacy, so I'm gonna tell Michael."
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"You owe me."
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"and a place that is far, far away from the evil sun."
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"How dare you, sir. You are gross."
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"That should not be there."
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"Was that Michael?"
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"I thought about playing in the NHL, but you're on the road so much."
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"And I really want a wife and kids."
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"I got it."
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"you should check yourself out. You know, give yourself an exam."
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"All right? Think about it."
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"Carol? Yeah."
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"She sold me my condo."
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"No, I don't just sell real estate."
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"Oh, these all your kids?"
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"Oh. Hey, guys. What's up?"
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"Sure. Cool. All right, grab on."
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"Here we go. You ready? Hang on tight."
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"All right. We are moving."
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"All right."
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"It's negative."
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"Oh, God!"
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"We're gonna beat this, okay? We're gonna..."
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"Come here."
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"which makes absolutely no sense."
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"In the real world community"
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"Okay, who is this from?"
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"Show it."
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"From Dwight. Number One. Thank you, Dwight. That's great. Thanks."
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"Michael. Yeah."
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"Night Swept."
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"I love it."
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"It was a good day."
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"I don't know."
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"These things sell themselves. Who uses calling cards anymore?"
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"Didn't you lose a lot of money on that other investment,"
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"So, I have a perfect icebreaker if I ever meet Teri Hatcher."
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"And then he runs around the office."
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"Did you hear anything yet? No."
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"Don't spoil the surprise."
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"Oh, great, put her through. Okay."
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"Am I on camera? Nope."
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"They said this afternoon. They're waiting on a second opinion."
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"You don't know it's going to be okay. Don't give him false hope."
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"Thank you, my friends. She is perfect."
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"My birthday blows."
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"Come here, come here, come here, come here."
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"$39."
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"Baloney, tomato and ketchup. The best."
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"No."
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"And she got him a cake at the restaurant,"
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"Okay. I'm gonna... Here we go. Make a wish."
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"That's..."
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"Is this trip in any way related to your birthday?"
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"I wanna go..."
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"Yeah, I've been pretty much skating my whole life."
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"Michael? Yeah."
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"Excuse me."
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"Okay, I will. Thanks."
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"Well, apparently, in the medicine community,"
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"that would be chaos."
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"Thanks, you guys."
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"Okay. Calling cards are the wave of the future."
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"How is this not a pyramid scheme?"
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"I have to go make a call."
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"Cool. It's gonna be fun. You're late. Thank you, it's noon."
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"Haven't had a hug all day."
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"Such a dork."
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"Those things are like ticking time-bags."
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"Michael would like trick candles for his birthday cake,"
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"I bet Luke Perry's friends don't treat him like this."
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"So, huh?"
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"I just can't relax about it, you know? Kevin!"
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"Great."
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"Oh, okay. Second opinion on what?"
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"Here they come. Get in here."
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"so make that a priority."
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"All right. No."
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"What? What? Listen up, everyone."
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"I can sign for it. Oh, thanks."
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"It sounds like a get-rich-quick scheme."
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"That suit is amazing. Thank you very much."
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"and he had skin cancer, too."
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"These are all the same. Yes."
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"But I heard about it the next day in school."
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"Oh, I got it. Wait."
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"No cookie."
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"No one cares about your birthday."
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"Kevin, we're gonna take you to a very special place,"
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"And I'm thinking that next time you're in the shower,"
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"Okay. Well, live strong."
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"His father ran the freaking country, okay?"
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"And then he has a sugar crash in the afternoon. And then he falls asleep."
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"Excellent. On my part, I did manage to reserve the..."
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"That and my sister's."
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"That was the saddest funeral ever."
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"Well, I guess I forgot to give you a donut."
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"All right."
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"my mother hired a pony and a cart"
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"and I never came outside."
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"Right, have a seat please. Oh, God."
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"Sixty."
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"Come and get it. Everybody, birthday party subs."
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