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Clips from Archer (2009) - Animation (S03E03)

"Now, Sterling, listen to me."
Archer (2009)
"Sterling. This car cost me a lot of money."
Archer (2009)
"So you have to take proper care of it. I will."
Archer (2009)
"And if you crash it... I won't."
Archer (2009)
"Or, God forbid, if you get it stolen... I won't."
Archer (2009)
"...you won't ever get another one."
Archer (2009)
"Mother, I promise, I'll take the best care of it of anything ever."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, no, I don't think that's really..."
Archer (2009)
"Possible."
Archer (2009)
"Shotgun. Me too."
Archer (2009)
"Sorry, it's this Corinthian leather."
Archer (2009)
"In my new Dodge Challenger!"
Archer (2009)
"Ahem. I forgot to close the bar."
Archer (2009)
"In my new Dodge Challenger!"
Archer (2009)
"Wow, so how much did Dodge kick in?"
Archer (2009)
"Not as much as you'd think."
Archer (2009)
"So I hope this doesn't sound weird..."
Archer (2009)
"...but I kind of wanna have sex with you. Is that all right?"
Archer (2009)
"Oh! Seriously, Dodge? Apple juice?"
Archer (2009)
"...but the blond genie woman who lives inside you that talks."
Archer (2009)
"So, what do I call you?"
Archer (2009)
"Hello? Jeannie? It's me, master."
Archer (2009)
"Wait a minute, was that just a lame pre-recorded video?"
Archer (2009)
"Or are you pouting for some reason?"
Archer (2009)
"Fine, then pout."
Archer (2009)
"But that totally wasn't my fault."
Archer (2009)
"You shouldn't even be able to put the car in gear with the bar open."
Archer (2009)
"Besides the danger of drunk driving, it's obviously a huge design flaw."
Archer (2009)
"Which is why now you're all sticky."
Archer (2009)
"Which, I'm sorry for that."
Archer (2009)
"Once we get you parked, I'll clean you up and wipe you down with a fine chamois."
Archer (2009)
"And also quit talking to you, because now I'm pretty sure that was just a recording."
Archer (2009)
"I mean, it was, right?"
Archer (2009)
"Whatever. Either way, I'm done talking."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, come on, it's full?"
Archer (2009)
"Damn it. Guess I'll have to park on the street."
Archer (2009)
"If you get it stolen, you won't ever get another one."
Archer (2009)
"I heard you, Mother. Somehow."
Archer (2009)
"Ooh."
Archer (2009)
"Hi, neighbor."
Archer (2009)
"The grappling hook detaches from my end?"
Archer (2009)
"So clean all the broken glass and the sticky apple juice..."
Archer (2009)
"...then I need all new glassware, some real liquor."
Archer (2009)
"Um, oh. There's a grappling hook in the street, get that, and then find out where to buy caltrops."
Archer (2009)
"Caltrops?"
Archer (2009)
"Yeah, caltrops. Try, maybe, area-denial-weapons.Com."
Archer (2009)
"Very good, sir."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, did you decide to start talking to me?"
Archer (2009)
"Like if Ron O'Neal was a car."
Archer (2009)
"No."
Archer (2009)
"No, no, no."
Archer (2009)
"No, no, no."
Archer (2009)
"Sir? What are you...?"
Archer (2009)
"I thought maybe she had some sort of cloaking device."
Archer (2009)
"No, then I'd be standing in it."
Archer (2009)
"You. What'd you do with Jeannie?"
Archer (2009)
"Steady on, sir."
Archer (2009)
"I swear to God, I'll scoop out whatever organs you have left and..."
Archer (2009)
"Sorry, sir, you were going all Bilbo-y."
Archer (2009)
"I'm sorry."
Archer (2009)
"Woodhouse, can I see that can for a sec? No, sir."
Archer (2009)
"I just wanted to read the warning label about "in case of eye contact.""
Archer (2009)
"You did not. You were going to spray me in the eyes."
Archer (2009)
"Heh, heh. I totally was."
Archer (2009)
"Oh, my God. Okay, I gotta think."
Archer (2009)
"Would you stop? They look pretty bad, sir."
Archer (2009)
"Really? Because they feel great."
Archer (2009)
"Gyppos."
Archer (2009)
"Car thieves. And this was obviously a ring of very high-end car thieves."
Archer (2009)
"So now I have to go undercover in the high-end car-thief whatever, underworld..."
Archer (2009)
"...and steal Jeannie back. Sounds dangerous, sir."
Archer (2009)
"Not nearly as dangerous as Mother finding out I lost my birthday present."
Archer (2009)
"Where is your new bicycle?"
Archer (2009)
"That's what I thought."
Archer (2009)
"And you let her do it. I..."
Archer (2009)
"I'm kidding. You couldn't have stopped her. She would've snapped your spine."
Archer (2009)
"I mean, you're just tiny."
Archer (2009)
"Lana. What do you know, what do you say?"
Archer (2009)
"I know you're about to ask me for a favor, and I say, wait for it..."
Archer (2009)
"- I... - Wait."
Archer (2009)
"Was that even a twist-off? No."
Archer (2009)
"I don't care what it is. The answer's no."
Archer (2009)
"Somebody stole my birthday car."
Archer (2009)
"Okay, I'm gonna drink some of this and then I'm gonna do a huge spit take on you."
Archer (2009)
"What the shit, Lana? I told you I was gonna do it."
Archer (2009)
"Obviously. Malory told you not to let that stupid car get stolen."
Archer (2009)
"Thank you, world's loudest voice. Now shut up."
Archer (2009)
"For reasons that don't bear going into, I have to get it back before Mother finds out."
Archer (2009)
"Ugh. Okay, I'll help you. To do... Wait, what am I helping you to do?"
Archer (2009)
"Infiltrate whatever criminal outfit steals the hottest cars in the city."
Archer (2009)
"What?"
Archer (2009)
"And, man, against those pinkieless bastards, you had better come correct."
Archer (2009)
"And you know this how, exactly?"
Archer (2009)
"Homies."
Archer (2009)
"Hang on, hang on..."
Archer (2009)
"You race drift cars?"
Archer (2009)
"Crappily. Oh, for..."
Archer (2009)
"Shut up. When's the next race? And we're gonna pose as your pit crew."
Archer (2009)
"If the yakuza finds out you're snooping around about a hot set of wheels..."
Archer (2009)
"Don't worry about me, I'm..."
Archer (2009)
"Not going on another stupid rampage."
Archer (2009)
"Well, maybe a limited rampage. No."
Archer (2009)
"Modified limited rampage? Archer."
Archer (2009)
"Don't worry about my methods. The important thing is that nobody tells..."
Archer (2009)
"Mother."
Archer (2009)
"Tell me what?"
Archer (2009)
"What are we doing? I shouldn't even be in here. And neither should you, Pam."
Archer (2009)
"Why aren't you out in your new car? Because Woodhouse is detailing it."
Archer (2009)
"Because that's the high level of care that I am taking of it."
Archer (2009)
"You better be."
Archer (2009)
"Wow, dodged a bullet there, huh?"
Archer (2009)
"Figuratively. And you had better hope we don't have to dodge any literally."
Archer (2009)
"Well, obviously I hope that."
Archer (2009)
"I am not super-confident about this."
Archer (2009)
"Join the club. I don't even know why I'm here."
Archer (2009)
"Join that club. Then shut up and act like you know what you're doing."
Archer (2009)
"I don't know anything about cars."
Archer (2009)
"I meant as an agent. Zing."
Archer (2009)
"Okay, Pam, who's the big cheesy-san around here?"
Archer (2009)
"That would be Mr. Moto, he's..."
Archer (2009)
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