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Clips from Brooklyn Nine-Nine - The Jimmy Jab Games (S02E02)

You've told me, like, a hundred times

"You've told me, like, a hundred times"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

about the time your nana collapsed

"about the time your nana collapsed"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and accidentally pulled Mia's pants down.

"and accidentally pulled Mia's pants down."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and spread my w...

"and spread my w..."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Get out there and spread my legs?

"Get out there and spread my legs?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

No, not either way. Only wings.

"No, not either way. Only wings."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The serbian President is delayed in Washington,

"The serbian President is delayed in Washington,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and we can't start locking down intersections

"and we can't start locking down intersections"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

until he takes off.

"until he takes off."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Apparently he's on an important call

"Apparently he's on an important call"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Is that bujar nishani or is it still bamir topi?

"Is that bujar nishani or is it still bamir topi?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Oh, ames, let me check.

"Oh, ames, let me check."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Hmm, it just says no one likes you.

"Hmm, it just says no one likes you."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Captain Holt and I will have to leave for a meeting

"Captain Holt and I will have to leave for a meeting"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

at one police plaza.

"at one police plaza."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You should all stay prepped and ready.

"You should all stay prepped and ready."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Dismissed.

"Dismissed."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Guys. Guys, guys, guys.

"Guys. Guys, guys, guys."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Makeovers. No, Charles.

"Makeovers. No, Charles."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The Jimmy jab games!

"The Jimmy jab games!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The first Jimmy jabs were held in 2008,

"The first Jimmy jabs were held in 2008,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

President, Iran. Armen Jimmy jab.

"President, Iran. Armen Jimmy jab."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Ahmadinejad. Came to New York,

"Ahmadinejad. Came to New York,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

in case there were protests.

"in case there were protests."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

used the last piece of his bagel

"used the last piece of his bagel"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

to create the first Jimmy jab event.

"to create the first Jimmy jab event."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

And the rest was history.

"And the rest was history."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

As soon as Holt and Terry leave,

"As soon as Holt and Terry leave,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

we will commence with Jimmy jab seven,

"we will commence with Jimmy jab seven,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Jimmy jabs!

"Jimmy jabs!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

with deputy chief Wuntch.

"with deputy chief Wuntch."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Is that how you plan on sitting?

"Is that how you plan on sitting?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Madeline will eat you alive.

"Madeline will eat you alive."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

That's no better.

"That's no better."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Hands folded on your lap like a pervert.

"Hands folded on your lap like a pervert."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Sir, what are you so nervous about?

"Sir, what are you so nervous about?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and we need updated narcotics field kits.

"and we need updated narcotics field kits."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

All we're asking for is $1,200.

"All we're asking for is $1,200."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Sergeant, as long as I'm asking for it,

"Sergeant, as long as I'm asking for it,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Ugh, may I?

"Ugh, may I?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Sir, she's a deputy chief.

"Sir, she's a deputy chief."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I'm sure she wants what's best for the community.

"I'm sure she wants what's best for the community."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

She doesn't care about the community.

"She doesn't care about the community."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

This is war, sergeant.

"This is war, sergeant."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The war on Wuntch.

"The war on Wuntch."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Oh, good. You've named it.

"Oh, good. You've named it."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

So Jimmy jabs, huh?

"So Jimmy jabs, huh?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Aha! We could play for Katie's number.

"Aha! We could play for Katie's number."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

No.

"No."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Is this why you wanted to do Jimmy jabs?

"Is this why you wanted to do Jimmy jabs?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

No. Yes. Why? What gave it away?

"No. Yes. Why? What gave it away?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Ah.

"Ah."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Oh, you wanna go out with Rosa's friend Katie?

"Oh, you wanna go out with Rosa's friend Katie?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

That's great. She's cool.

"That's great. She's cool."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

about not mixing work with personal stuff.

"about not mixing work with personal stuff."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

That's actually not a bad policy.

"That's actually not a bad policy."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I once gave my aunt a jaywalking ticket,

"I once gave my aunt a jaywalking ticket,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and things really deteriorated between us.

"and things really deteriorated between us."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

She's pretty. I'm pretty.

"She's pretty. I'm pretty."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

So it's settled.

"So it's settled."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

If I win the Jimmy jabs, you give me her number.

"If I win the Jimmy jabs, you give me her number."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I already don't have to give it to you.

"I already don't have to give it to you."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

It's daylight, Boyle. Why are we talking?

"It's daylight, Boyle. Why are we talking?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

with the precinct camera to help improve my form.

"with the precinct camera to help improve my form."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

But I realized that I left the tape

"But I realized that I left the tape"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Who cares?

"Who cares?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Who cares? Who cares?

"Who cares? Who cares?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You probably will.

"You probably will."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

to step up your sex game.

"to step up your sex game."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

But strength is not your issue.

"But strength is not your issue."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Stop humming.

"Stop humming."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

And it does not turn me on

"And it does not turn me on"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

when you bend over and back up into me.

"when you bend over and back up into me."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Yes, Hitchcock.

"Yes, Hitchcock."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

And if he sees it, he will tell everyone.

"And if he sees it, he will tell everyone."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You'll get word when the serbian President

"You'll get word when the serbian President"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

is wheels-up. You got it, sarge.

"is wheels-up. You got it, sarge."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

We'll just be here till you get back.

"We'll just be here till you get back."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Calmly and respectfully prepping.

"Calmly and respectfully prepping."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

All right, they're gone!

"All right, they're gone!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Flask.

"Flask."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Flame.

"Flame."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

♪ Jimmy jaaaaaabs ♪

"♪ Jimmy jaaaaaabs ♪"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Welcome to the Jimmy jabs.

"Welcome to the Jimmy jabs."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

We play for pride.

"We play for pride."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

We play for the phone numbers of Rosa's friends.

"We play for the phone numbers of Rosa's friends."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

But most importantly,

"But most importantly,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

we play to watch Amy lose.

"we play to watch Amy lose."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Nope. This is my year. It's my year too.

"Nope. This is my year. It's my year too."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Please don't align yourself with me.

"Please don't align yourself with me."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Why not?

"Why not?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Neither of you have ever come close to winning.

"Neither of you have ever come close to winning."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You're exactly the same,

"You're exactly the same,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

But the real prize is the Winchester 3000,

"But the real prize is the Winchester 3000,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

the only chair in the precinct

"the only chair in the precinct"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

with minimal staining,

"with minimal staining,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

good lumbar support,

"good lumbar support,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and no broken rolly-wheels.

"and no broken rolly-wheels."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Over to you, Gina.

"Over to you, Gina."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Okay, guys, as usual,

"Okay, guys, as usual,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

the loser of each event is eliminated from the games.

"the loser of each event is eliminated from the games."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The winner gets a bonus in the final round.

"The winner gets a bonus in the final round."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Our first event is...

"Our first event is..."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

"The mouthathon."

""The mouthathon.""

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

In front of you is month-old Chinese food

"In front of you is month-old Chinese food"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

from the fridge.

"from the fridge."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Go ahead and eat

"Go ahead and eat"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

get set, wahlberg!

"get set, wahlberg!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I can't do this to my mouth.

"I can't do this to my mouth."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

She's the love of my life.

"She's the love of my life."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Oh, great. Here, quick. Let me take a picture.

"Oh, great. Here, quick. Let me take a picture."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Oh, that's so cute.

"Oh, that's so cute."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I tried. I tried, but he's unbeatable.

"I tried. I tried, but he's unbeatable."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You guys know this is free, right?

"You guys know this is free, right?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Hello, deputy chief Wuntch.

"Hello, deputy chief Wuntch."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You've aged.

"You've aged."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Sergeant Jeffords, why don't you just lie down?

"Sergeant Jeffords, why don't you just lie down?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I can't sit any straighter than this.

"I can't sit any straighter than this."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

We're here about a new and very potent form of ecstasy,

"We're here about a new and very potent form of ecstasy,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

which has surfaced in our precinct.

"which has surfaced in our precinct."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

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