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Clips from Kevin Can Wait - Who's Better Than Us? (S01E01)

"The other day, he took a swing at me."
Kevin Can Wait
"I haven't seen you since you retired, man."
Kevin Can Wait
"Uh, you know, this and that."
Kevin Can Wait
"You're very funny, but you know what?"
Kevin Can Wait
"now I'm sitting home in front of the TV"
Kevin Can Wait
"That was me."
Kevin Can Wait
"At Galaxy Bagels?"
Kevin Can Wait
"But he didn't tell you anything about me?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Yeah, that's me. That's the guy he's talking about."
Kevin Can Wait
"Oh, wait a sec. I know who you are."
Kevin Can Wait
"You remember Teddy O'Boyle?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Exactly."
Kevin Can Wait
"um, what is it?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Okay."
Kevin Can Wait
"as your second-most-important?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Okay, see, that right there... That's why he's number 1."
Kevin Can Wait
"It's that attitude."
Kevin Can Wait
"and, uh... here we go."
Kevin Can Wait
"Hey, Duff, it's Kev."
Kevin Can Wait
"So, uh, I might have to jump in a second."
Kevin Can Wait
"Uh, what do you got in mind?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Uh, you know, something fun like, you know,"
Kevin Can Wait
"What are you talking about?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Okay, man, I'll... I'll, uh... I'll just see you tomorrow."
Kevin Can Wait
"Who taught you to hold a bat?"
Kevin Can Wait
"What is this? Hands together!"
Kevin Can Wait
"All right, I just saw the problem."
Kevin Can Wait
"How long it take him to come up with that one?"
Kevin Can Wait
"By the way, nice gloves. Where'd you get those?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Talk about buying a friend."
Kevin Can Wait
"No, I just got a weird vibe about this guy."
Kevin Can Wait
"I need you to be there."
Kevin Can Wait
"Hey! You guys are still here."
Kevin Can Wait
"Yeah, it's pretty self-evident that"
Kevin Can Wait
"Um, well, you look nice, but I think you..."
Kevin Can Wait
"- I'm like, "What's up?" - Okay."
Kevin Can Wait
"Look, I'm just thinking, I don't know, more like, uh,"
Kevin Can Wait
"I mean, and then... Oh, and maybe you, uh,"
Kevin Can Wait
"You just like to dig, don't you?"
Kevin Can Wait
"I'm sorry. You look nice."
Kevin Can Wait
"when you came to midnight mass with your Jets jersey."
Kevin Can Wait
"Built it himself out of Spanish driftwood."
Kevin Can Wait
"Hey, Father Philip, when I go up there,"
Kevin Can Wait
"Actually, I... I think I'm going up, so..."
Kevin Can Wait
"Oh. Oh, that's cool."
Kevin Can Wait
"Maybe he's gonna ask both of us to go up."
Kevin Can Wait
"a man who knows the true meaning of loyalty."
Kevin Can Wait
"Wow."
Kevin Can Wait
"An amazing, amazing partner."
Kevin Can Wait
"Just he's bringing him first."
Kevin Can Wait
"And that's a good thing 'cause humility..."
Kevin Can Wait
"It's your life you're thinking about!"
Kevin Can Wait
"How do I get you back to your family?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Sorry. It just, uh, felt a little written to me."
Kevin Can Wait
"Yeah, of, uh, 10 years, we road together, right?"
Kevin Can Wait
"what, three months now?"
Kevin Can Wait
"I'm just retired. That's all."
Kevin Can Wait
"Then why'd you tuck in?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Can you arrest people?"
Kevin Can Wait
"But, uh, and not top-shelf, either, right?"
Kevin Can Wait
"She was not, I mean..."
Kevin Can Wait
"Oh, boy."
Kevin Can Wait
"I think total humiliation sums it up."
Kevin Can Wait
"that doesn't mean that you're not, too."
Kevin Can Wait
"You're the most important relationship in my life."
Kevin Can Wait
"It just doesn't make sense."
Kevin Can Wait
"But how about I go upstairs and draw us"
Kevin Can Wait
"Yeah."
Kevin Can Wait
"You gonna let me in?"
Kevin Can Wait
"But, uh, I guess it was a little bit of payback."
Kevin Can Wait
"I'm like, "You got this one?" He's like, "Yep.""
Kevin Can Wait
"So, all the stories about him are true?"
Kevin Can Wait
"He took them home, and he trained them."
Kevin Can Wait
"What's that?"
Kevin Can Wait
"And I turn it up."
Kevin Can Wait
"I don't even have to look at you"
Kevin Can Wait
"♪ You don't sing me love songs ♪"
Kevin Can Wait
"♪ You hardly talk to me anymore ♪"
Kevin Can Wait
"♪ I remember when ♪"
Kevin Can Wait
"♪ When it's good for you, baby ♪"
Kevin Can Wait
"♪ And you're feeling all right ♪"
Kevin Can Wait
"When you went low, I took it up high."
Kevin Can Wait
"Next time we do this."
Kevin Can Wait
"- Yes, yes. - You know what I'm saying?"
Kevin Can Wait
"- I think we should do this. - ♪ Nessun dorma ♪"
Kevin Can Wait
"♪ Vincero' ♪"
Kevin Can Wait
"Right. Like, in each bite,"
Kevin Can Wait
"you get a little bit of sweet, you get a little bit of hot."
Kevin Can Wait
"- Mm-hmm. - These things are amazing."
Kevin Can Wait
"So, how's your gig going down at the retirement home?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Oh, it's crazy."
Kevin Can Wait
"This one old guy thinks I'm his son-in-law."
Kevin Can Wait
"Missed me by like six feet, fell into another guy."
Kevin Can Wait
"They shattered like a bag of light bulbs."
Kevin Can Wait
"Yeah, my mom's getting fragile, too."
Kevin Can Wait
"I think this is gonna be the last winter"
Kevin Can Wait
"I let her shovel the driveway."
Kevin Can Wait
"Well, I should get going."
Kevin Can Wait
"Didi's got me volunteering at a soup kitchen."
Kevin Can Wait
"They make me wear a hairnet."
Kevin Can Wait
"A hairnet."
Kevin Can Wait
"Oh, by... by the way, guys, I got this."
Kevin Can Wait
"- Don't worry about it. - Can't help you."
Kevin Can Wait
"I'm into a couple of Girl Scouts for a lot of cookies."
Kevin Can Wait
"All right."
Kevin Can Wait
"Jimmy?"
Kevin Can Wait
"- Hey! - Hey!"
Kevin Can Wait
"What?"
Kevin Can Wait
"You look amazing. Look at you."
Kevin Can Wait
"Get out of here. What have you been up to?"
Kevin Can Wait
"Don't be modest."
Kevin Can Wait
"You're the guys who took down bin Laden, right?"
Kevin Can Wait
"All right."
Kevin Can Wait
"I know. No, no, I get it. You can't talk about it."
Kevin Can Wait
"I only got to work one day a week."
Kevin Can Wait
"So while you're out patrolling the streets,"
Kevin Can Wait
"interrogating a bag of Fritos."
Kevin Can Wait
"Oh. Ooh, that sounds good."
Kevin Can Wait
"Without pants."
Kevin Can Wait
"Sounds good with a side of weird."
Kevin Can Wait
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