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Clips from The Simpsons (1989) - I, Carumbus (S32E32)

"with much land, but no ox to plow it."
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"So he improvised."
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"We finally got enough money to buy us an ox."
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"Woo‐hoo! How'd you do that, father?"
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"I sold you into slavery."
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"CURATOR: A frightened Obeseus"
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"and his new work friends"
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"were taken to Rome."
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"The boys had never seen anything like it‐‐ the crowds,"
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"the noise, the grand scale"
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"of the pornographic graffiti."
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"of being hacked to death on the field of battle."
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"Us? But we're not gladiators."
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"Not with that attitude."
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"Remember, there are no small wounds,"
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"only small victims."
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"(whimpering)"
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"(crowd cheering)"
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"Hailing from Germania,"
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"And in the shaking tunic,"
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"hailing from who knows, nobody cares‐‐"
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"that guy."
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"(booing)"
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"Someone's in here."
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"Aah!"
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"CURATOR: Obeseus didn't know much,"
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"but he knew how to be an ox."
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"Juno, Mother of Apollo."
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"All right, pal, should we call it a tie?"
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"A‐Aah!"
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"(cheering)"
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"All hail our new champion,"
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"Mr. Plow himself,"
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"- Yeah! - (cheering)"
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"Oh..."
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"Feed him to the hippos."
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"No, Father, look how the crowd loves him."
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"Majora, you have quite the mind"
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"for the family business."
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"The man‐ox will live to fight another day."
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"(lowing)"
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"CURATOR: Obeseus' fame grew"
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"as he rose through the gladiatorial ranks."
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"Women wanted him"
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"and men wanted to be killed by him."
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"(cheering)"
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"But still he yearned for that"
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"which he longed for."
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"MAJORA: Eye... heart... U!"
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"Oh..."
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"(sighs) You guys think we'll ever be free again?"
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"(scoffs) The only way we're leaving this place"
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"Uh, don't mind me, fellas."
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"Another clog in the chunk chute. (chuckles)"
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"They got to start cutting you guys into smaller pieces."
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"If one of us ever gets free,"
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"To freedom."
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"ALL: To freedom!"
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"Eh, you chunks are no fun."
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"What are you doing here?"
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"I have to keep an eye on my father's investments."
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"Plus, I like the way your pecs dance"
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"after you kill a guy."
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"(giggles) These old things?"
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"Blip, blip, bla‐bla, blip, Blip, bla‐bla, blip."
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"(growls, laughs)"
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"(sing‐songy): Swish and slash and spin and kick"
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"and slice that belly and hello, guts."
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"has impregnated my daughter."
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"Tell me who laid with her,"
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"and the rest of you will be spared the lash."
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"Mm..."
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"- I had sexicus. - I had sexicus."
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"I had sexicus."
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"We were covering for you, jackass."
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"Oh, right."
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"Sir, I'm in love with your daughter."
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"Place his head on the beheading block."
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"Which is also the unlocking block."
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"Rise, for you are now free..."
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"Woo‐hoo!"
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"- ...to marry my daughter. - D'oh!"
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"(chuckling): I‐I mean, great."
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"What could be more liberating than marriage?"
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"CURATOR: The young lovers were wed for all the gods to see."
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"And plans were made for their future."
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"So that you may build a life together,"
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"Oh, thank you, Daddy."
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"I have so many great ideas."
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"leave the business talk to the men."
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"(sighs)"
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"Now, Obeseus, to get things started,"
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"please, take some slaves on the house."
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"Aw, slaves? You shouldn't ha..."
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"(gasps) I can't own my friends."
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"CURATOR: Majora then understood:"
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"for a woman to have any voice in this world,"
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"to take on the backbreaking work of four men,"
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"day in, day out,"
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"no matter how poor and hungry"
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"- it shall leave you. - (weak chuckle)"
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"Look, fellas, no one honors oaths more than me."
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"No one."
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"Just give me a little time till we get on our feet,"
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"then I'll totally free you."
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"Management thanks you for your patience."
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"CURATOR: And, so, in choosing greed over loyalty,"
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"and their fall from grace."
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"(whines)"
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"CURATOR: Obeseus entered the second act of his life"
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"given to him by his father‐in‐law‐‐"
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"a laundromat."
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"(yawns)"
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"CURATOR: Fun fact: in Ancient Rome, clothes were washed"
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"with ammonia, which is derived from human urine."
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"What's up, Dad?"
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"- Mellow and yellow. - (laughs)"
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"Why is the store closed?"
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"It's only noon."
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"Me and the fellas are all peed out."
The Simpsons (1989)
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