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Clips from Curb Your Enthusiasm - The Table Read (S07E07)

"Yeah, it was her idea. I mean, yeah."
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"Then you guys met at the table read and I gave her your number..."
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"- You gave her the number? - Mm-hmm. ( Chuckles )"
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"You know, when you're a kid and you like can relate to a grown-up,"
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"- it's a really exciting... - Stacy: It's such a big deal."
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"- It is cute. - Jerry: Someone to communicate with."
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"- Yeah. - Okay."
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"- Hmm. - Cool. All right."
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"- Jerry: All right. - How's her..."
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"How's her pussy, by the way?"
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"- So thank you for asking. - Oh, cool."
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"Yeah, all right, I'm going to get on the camera thing."
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"Let's look at..."
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"- Okay, so I'll go to the fridge on this. - Yeah yeah."
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"- I'm not ready, Elaine. - Come on, Jerry, you have to."
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"When you came to me, you said, "I need a donation.""
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"And I gave, and that was hard work."
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"I just think it would be nice if she knew who her father was."
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"Clark Kent didn't know who his father was till he was 16"
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"and he turned out pretty good."
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"Jerry, his planet was destroyed."
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"I think I continue."
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"He was fortunate to discover the crystals"
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"in the fortress of solitude."
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"Isabel's not going to have any of those crystals."
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"You know about the crystals?"
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"- Of course I know about the crystals. - ( Knocking )"
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"Door."
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"( Larry laughs )"
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"- Hello, Newman. - Hello, Jerry."
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"I wonder if you would tell your friend George"
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"Well, I'm afraid in that particular scenario my sympathies..."
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"( Larry laughing )"
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"Now I'm going to close the door on you."
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"- How am I going to do that? - I'll get out."
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"( Laughter )"
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"- Do it. I want to hear that line. - Okay."
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"All right, you watch the show. We'll do it for you, okay?"
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"- Action. - Wayne: I found it anything but acceptable."
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"Well, I'm afraid in that particular scenario,"
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"my sympathies lie only with the toilet."
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"Good day."
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"- Are you Kramer? - No."
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"- Are you monena? - Mm-hmm."
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"I'm going to the ballgame."
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"- ( Clicks tongue ) - I see."
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"Well, I think you... You're a hooker."
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"You should just go in and make yourself at home."
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"- Right, you follow her in. - Are you good?"
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"Okay, guys, take five. That's a tight five."
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"Hey, Larry, did you call duberstein?"
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"- Well, I left a message... - Yeah?"
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"And, you know,"
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"How long ago did you leave the message?"
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"- Yesterday. - Yesterday?"
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"- Yeah. - I don't want to push you on this,"
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"but I can hardly think out here."
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"You know what the doctor said to me?"
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"Oh, good. I, um..."
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"I'm having a bit of a problem"
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"just trying to find a tone."
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"You don't need a Cadence. Just be yourself. You're doing great."
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"I want you to sound like you. I wrote it for you."
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"I feel like you're my only..."
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"- You know... - Yeah."
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"- Good morning. Good morning. - Hi."
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"- Don't mean to interrupt. - No, go ahead. We'll talk later."
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"- Okay. Good morning. - Hey."
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"- Mission accomplished. - What is this?"
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"- A pen. - Yes, it is a pen."
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"- You're right about that. - Yes, I am, sir."
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"This is not replacing the pen."
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"You didn't say, "get the same pen.""
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"It's not an eye for a lesser eye, okay?"
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"Using your metaphor, no no."
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"They both see exactly the same."
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"- writes in blue ink. - Uh-huh."
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"This pen is almost blind compared to my pen."
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"No, believe me. It sees the truth."
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"It's not the pen I gave you."
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"- No replacement. - That's your pen."
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"I'm going to get a coffee."
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"Anyway, I screwed the whole thing up."
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"Michael thinks that duberstein beat groat's"
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"and he's expecting to meet him,"
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"- What the fuck you thinking about? - Well, I had an insane idea"
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"that you could present yourself as duberstein somehow"
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"and get... just meet him for two minutes."
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"And I'd be there too, so you wouldn't even have to talk."
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"What, you think I can't do this shit, huh?"
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"I'll white that shit up. I'll white that whole shit up."
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"You've seen a fucking black dude who acts fucking white."
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"- He around too many fucking white people and shit. - You can be that guy?"
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""I heard you have groat's disease." See that shit?"
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"Well, what about the name? Duberstein?"
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"- Tell him I'm a Ethiopian Jew. - You know what?"
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"You could tell him you were adopted"
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"by the Jewish family... The dubersteins."
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"- I was fucking adopted... - You got bar mitzvahed."
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""Bar mitzfit" and all that shit, yeah."
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"- It's not "bar mitzfit." - "Bar mitzfit.""
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"- Bar mitzvahed. - "Bar mitzfit.""
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""Vahed"! Bar mitzvahed."
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"If we're gonna do this, you'd better learn how to pronounce this."
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"- ( Cell phone chimes ) - "bar mitzfit.""
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"- Yeah. - Oh, Christ."
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"Another text from her. Can you believe it?"
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"I got this nine-year-old, and she keeps texting me."
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""Is Jerry as funny in real life as on TV?" Unbelievable."
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""Yes, Jerry is very funny.""
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"I'm telling you, it never ends with her."
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"Monsieur David. How are you?"
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"- Great. - Wonderful to see you."
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"- Ã bientã't. - Okay."
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"Oh my god!"
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"- Yeah. - Hey! What?!"
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"- What happened? - He took..."
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"He took my $20. Are you kidding?"
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"He took your fucking money out your hand?"
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"What did he think? I was tipping him?"
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