Loading...
You're not connected to the Internet. Please check your connection.

Clips from The Simpsons - Missionary: Impossible (S11E11)

"''the hairy crown of those who walk in their guilty ways..."
The Simpsons
"that you may bathe your feet in blood.''"
The Simpsons
"As true today as it was when it was written."
The Simpsons
"Now let's open it up to some Q&A."
The Simpsons
"Yes, Lisa Jr.?"
The Simpsons
"Amy said there are lots of religions. Which is the right one?"
The Simpsons
"Um, if the Lord is all-powerful..."
The Simpsons
"[ Chuckles ] Ak just saying."
The Simpsons
"Well, Ak, it's because God is powerful, but also insecure-"
The Simpsons
"like Barbra Streisand beforeJames Brolin."
The Simpsons
"Oh, who am I kidding? The truth is I'm no missionary."
The Simpsons
"I work in a nuclear power plant."
The Simpsons
"Look, the point is, I want to help."
The Simpsons
"But you don't need a well or a chapel or an immunization center."
The Simpsons
"What you need's a little razzle-dazzle."
The Simpsons
"[ Gasps ] Q'Toktok, are you thinking what I'm thinking?"
The Simpsons
"- I am Ak. - Hey, that's great. Now let's get to work."
The Simpsons
"it's that pelicans can be used to mix cement."
The Simpsons
"Come on, little friend. Make a wisecrack."
The Simpsons
"You know- ''It's a living.'' That sort of thing."
The Simpsons
"- Oopsy. - [ Bird Caws ]"
The Simpsons
"- Hiya, Homer. - That's not Homer."
The Simpsons
"- Simpson! - Aah!"
The Simpsons
"- But I'm not Homer Simpson. - I think I know who Homer Simpson is."
The Simpsons
"In 1 0 short years you've caused 1 7 meltdowns."
The Simpsons
"- One is too many. - Yeah, but-"
The Simpsons
"You sold weapons-grade plutonium to the Iraqis-with no markup."
The Simpsons
"- But- - And worst of all..."
The Simpsons
"you took the Hamburglar's birthday off last Monday and Wednesday."
The Simpsons
"Now, my voice is giving out, so I'm just going to poke you for the next hour or so."
The Simpsons
"Friends, when I came here one month ago..."
The Simpsons
"this seemed like a strange and frightening place."
The Simpsons
"But now I've learned to love this island as my second-"
The Simpsons
"[ Groans ] Anyhoo-"
The Simpsons
"I'm about to share with you a modern-day miracle-"
The Simpsons
"Something that has revitalized cities from East Saint Louis to Biloxi, Mississippi."
The Simpsons
"The magic medicine of..."
The Simpsons
"casino gambling!"
The Simpsons
"- ''The Lucky Savage''? - It could be you."
The Simpsons
"Check it out-There's island blackjack..."
The Simpsons
"island craps, island Texas hold 'em."
The Simpsons
"But if, like me, you're mesmerized by pretty colors and spinning things..."
The Simpsons
"you'll prefer roulette."
The Simpsons
"Four sand dollars on number six, please."
The Simpsons
"[ Rattling ]"
The Simpsons
"- So how you doin'? Stayin' out of trouble? - Yes, sir."
The Simpsons
"- Number six. - Whoo-hoo!"
The Simpsons
"D'oh!"
The Simpsons
"Now over here I've brewed up my favorite beverage."
The Simpsons
"Beer. It's mostly Dristan and holy water, but it does the job."
The Simpsons
"- [ Chattering ] - So have fun, everybody."
The Simpsons
"And who knows? Maybe you'll hit the jackpot, get off this island..."
The Simpsons
"and spend the rest of your days in a tropical paradise."
The Simpsons
"Homer, I'm so impressed. Everything you're doing sounds so rewarding."
The Simpsons
"Oh, you should have seen their faces, honey."
The Simpsons
"Now I know how Bob Stupak feels."
The Simpsons
"## [ Whistling ]"
The Simpsons
"Is everybody happy?"
The Simpsons
"[ Shouting, Screaming ]"
The Simpsons
"- [ Groans ] - Oh, my God."
The Simpsons
"Huh? What kind of god would allow that?"
The Simpsons
"[ Groans ]"
The Simpsons
"- [ Clamoring ] - [ Gasps ] Oh, what happened?"
The Simpsons
"I gave you a glittering Vegas and you turned it into a scanty Atlantic City."
The Simpsons
"Your alcohol and inexpensive buffets have corrupted us."
The Simpsons
"I don't even like macaroni salad..."
The Simpsons
"Please help us."
The Simpsons
"Our island has not been this damaged since the A-bomb tests."
The Simpsons
"Can it wait? I just got off work."
The Simpsons
"Don't you do enough yakkin' at the beauty parlor?"
The Simpsons
"That's it, Bart. You're taking this ''man of the house'' thing too far."
The Simpsons
"You're right. I'm sorry. Tell you what."
The Simpsons
"Saturday night, we'll go out for steaks- just you and me."
The Simpsons
"Hmm. A night out is a night out."
The Simpsons
"[ Grunting ]"
The Simpsons
"[ Speaking Native Language ]"
The Simpsons
"Why are you building chapel?"
The Simpsons
"- Because you're all terrible sinners. - Since when?"
The Simpsons
"Since I got here."
The Simpsons
"Now either grab a stone or go to hell."
The Simpsons
"[ All Gasp ]"
The Simpsons
"[ Grunting ]"
The Simpsons
"Well, I may not know much about God..."
The Simpsons
"Thanks to you, all of us finally have a place to pray."
The Simpsons
"How many times must we go to church to avoid hell?"
The Simpsons
"Every Sunday for the rest of our lives."
The Simpsons
"[ Laughs ] No, really."
The Simpsons
"Not bad, Lisa Jr."
The Simpsons
"But God's palace is way up on the moon."
The Simpsons
"[ Slurping ] So if you want him to hear us..."
The Simpsons
"we've gotta crank up the volume."
The Simpsons
"- [ Chiming Louder] - Do you hear me, Lord?"
The Simpsons
"Homer's doin' your work!"
The Simpsons
"[ Whimpering ]"
The Simpsons
"Oh, no! This looks like the end."
The Simpsons
"[ Both Screaming ]"
The Simpsons
"[ Laughing ] Oh, that Homer- always getting into trouble."
The Simpsons
"And if you're one of the millions who enjoys his adventures-"
The Simpsons
"or should I say misadventures-"
The Simpsons
"it's time to show your support."
The Simpsons
"Sure, Fox makes a fortune from advertising..."
The Simpsons
"- but it's still not enough. - Not nearly enough!"
The Simpsons
"So if you don't want to see crude, lowbrow programming disappear from the airwaves..."
The Simpsons
"please, call now."
The Simpsons
"[ Rings ]"
The Simpsons
"[ With Australian Accent ] Hello! Murdoch here."
The Simpsons
"$10,000!"
The Simpsons
"You've saved my network."
The Simpsons
"Wouldn't be the first time."
The Simpsons
"[ Homer] Save me,Jebus!"
The Simpsons
"- [ Static ] - [ Homer] Jebus, where are you?"
The Simpsons
"I am Q'Toktok, and this is Ak."
The Simpsons
"Oh, man, I need a beer."
The Simpsons
"[ Marge's Voice ] Homer? Homer!"
The Simpsons
"I'm just God's messenger."
The Simpsons
"It's gotta be. He's parking in Homer's space."
The Simpsons
"Well, time to get to work. Mmm."
The Simpsons
"Which is it? [ Exhales ]"
The Simpsons
"[ Groans ]"
The Simpsons
"I'm sorry, honey. I just thought you-"
The Simpsons
Show more clips