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Clips from South Park - D-Yikes! (S11E11)

"we could send them in to try to dig up some dirt on the owner!"
South Park
"But who's going to spy on them for us?!"
South Park
"We don't know any Persians."
South Park
"There's people you can hire for this kind of thing."
South Park
"Que pasol!"
South Park
"Looking for work? Si?"
South Park
"Alright, we need you to infiltrate some Persians"
South Park
"- Sure. - Okay, yeah."
South Park
"Janet, how is this going to work?"
South Park
"Look, you just have to gel the hair."
South Park
"and tons of cologne."
South Park
"Persian."
South Park
"Wow."
South Park
"Alright, Mexicans, take the rest of these outfits"
South Park
"and see what you can find out. The address is in there, too."
South Park
"Okay."
South Park
"A full day passed,"
South Park
"and the Lesbos knew a second Persian attack was imminent."
South Park
"ready to alert the others."
South Park
"The Lesbo leader sat nervously inside."
South Park
"Her plan to dress Mexicans as Persians to act as spies--"
South Park
"Perhaps, it had failed."
South Park
"She looked around at her fellow Lesbos."
South Park
"They were tired."
South Park
"In order to keep her lesbos awake, she had no choice."
South Park
"She would have to make coffee."
South Park
"With fresh coffee brewed, the Lesbos found new life."
South Park
"But would it be enough?"
South Park
"The Persians are attacking again!"
South Park
"Take positions, Lesbos!"
South Park
"Get outside!"
South Park
"That's not the Persians, it's the Mexicans!"
South Park
"Really?"
South Park
"How can you tell?"
South Park
"Let them through. It's okay!"
South Park
"Hola."
South Park
"Como estas."
South Park
"Did you uncover anything?"
South Park
"Are the Persians doing anything illegal?"
South Park
"Uhh, no, they're not doing anything illegal."
South Park
"Are you sure?"
South Park
"But we did find out a kind of secret about the person in charge."
South Park
"What secret?"
South Park
"Oh, my God."
South Park
"Are you sure about this?"
South Park
"Si."
South Park
"Janet. The Persian boss is here."
South Park
"It's okay."
South Park
"Why are you lesbians being so difficult?"
South Park
"Because we're protecting the only home we have."
South Park
"You know, a long time ago when I first realized I was a lesbian,"
South Park
"I felt isolated, confused."
South Park
"Okay, how about this--"
South Park
"I will make you the manager of Club Persh."
South Park
"That's a generous offer, Xerxis."
South Park
"I know you're actually a woman."
South Park
"I hired Mexicans to spy on you."
South Park
"They saw you working out at Curves."
South Park
"You don't understand."
South Park
"Women can't be the boss in Persian culture!"
South Park
"Nobody can know about this!"
South Park
"Yeah, and you know why?"
South Park
"Because men are all assholes."
South Park
"They make you feel ashamed for being a little big or manly looking."
South Park
"But not lesbos."
South Park
"We accept other women for who they are inside."
South Park
"Have you never even thought of being with another woman before?"
South Park
"No, I don't even know how two women can make love."
South Park
"Scissor me, Xerxis!"
South Park
"Oh, that feels so super good."
South Park
"Oh, I'm a new woman!"
South Park
"And so it was that Lesbos was saved."
South Park
"The Persians had agreed to keep it a lesbian bar,"
South Park
"for no dyke should be without cocktails."
South Park
"Thanks for everything, Xerxis."
South Park
"No. Thank you, friend."
South Park
"And so, to find the sum of the two fractions--"
South Park
"You must always first check for the lowest common denominator."
South Park
"Si."
South Park
"- Si. Si. - Yes."
South Park
"These guys are pretty good."
South Park
"Everyone sit down and shut the fuck up!"
South Park
"Dude, we can't read an entire book in one weekend!"
South Park
"Allison and I talked and we really opened up to each other and then we--"
South Park
"We're scissoring!"
South Park
"I can't believe what I'm hearing!"
South Park
"No!"
South Park
"There's so many of them."
South Park
"Let us in!"
South Park
"What do you mean?"
South Park
"- Trabajo? - Yes."
South Park
"We all can work, si."
South Park
"some gold chains,"
South Park
"Si."
South Park
"Outside, Lesbo lookouts kept watch,"
South Park
"But you see, there's something I know about you--"
South Park
"By kicking the Persian messenger in the balls,"
South Park
"You said you all wrote essays!"
South Park
"Jimmy, did you finish your book report?"
South Park
"Hey, aren't you supposed to be teaching school right now?"
South Park
"Yeah!"
South Park
"Seriously!"
South Park
"Yeah, I think I'm actually learning something."
South Park