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Clips from The Simpsons - Black Widower (S03E03)

"MacGyver was wearing a tank top."
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"Dang."
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"[ Man ] Señor MacGyver, you saved our village."
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"[ MacGyver ] Don't thank me."
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"Thank the moon's gravitational pull."
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"That MacGyver's a genius."
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"First of all, he's not a genius. He's an actor."
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"And second, he's not much of an actor."
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"that never made me retch."
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"There. There."
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"Fiddle-dee-dee. Tomorrow's another day."
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"We're a package."
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"Love me, love MacGyver."
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"I guess the wedding's off."
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"Very well."
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"I-- I--"
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"[ Sobbing ]"
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"I hate all the programs Marge likes..."
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"You know why?"
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"I go to a bar, I pound a few..."
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"I'll take a vigorous constitutional..."
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"and return more in love than ever."
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"Bad medicine."
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"[ Organ Playing ''The Wedding March'']"
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"Hey, they chose Maggie, okay?"
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"If you want to go for cutesyness..."
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"Do you, Bob, take Selma..."
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"- Mmm. - Oh."
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"[ Munching, Gobbling ]"
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"I'm the only single girl left in the family."
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"Oh, there's Krusty the Clown."
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"Krusty, say something funny."
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"Um... uh... funny."
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"Oh, no, wait. I can't tell that one."
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"God took 1 68 pounds of clay, and he made me a woman..."
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"Selma, dear, you'll bury us all."
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"Chief Wiggum, you've been around."
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"You don't trust Sideshow Bob, do you?"
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"Now, where did I put my gun?"
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"Oh, yeah. I set it down when I got some cake."
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"Just tell me what you know I want to hear."
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"Thank you."
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"[ Menacing Laughter]"
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"Welcome to our video honeymoon."
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"We're using the video camera cousin Doug gave us..."
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"my brand-new hubby."
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"I wanted a room with a fireplace..."
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"Like the one in your brochure!"
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"Oh, Selma, dear."
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"I was just chatting with my good friend... Dennis."
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"Scourge of Prometheus, toaster of marshmallows..."
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"Oh, Selma, dear-- you and your little camera."
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"And make love?"
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"[ Marge ] Oh, that's sweet."
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"Why would Sideshow Bob go so nuts over a fireplace?"
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"to be romantic."
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"Romantic? With Aunt Selma?"
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"[ Selma Moaning ]"
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"Bob, one of my fillings fell out."
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"Even murder has its ugly side."
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"[ Shuddering Groan ]"
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"- Soon I will kill you. - Huh?"
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"French for ''her foot smells lovely.''"
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"Oh."
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"Huh?"
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"[ Laughs ]"
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"- Voy a matar a usted. - Wha?"
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"- Say what? - I do believe it's time..."
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"for your beloved MacGyver."
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"[ Suspenseful Music ]"
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"- Well, time for my walk. - Mm."
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"Ding-dong."
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"I was feeling kind of lonely without Selma."
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"Oh, go ahead, Patty."
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"Tonight, on MacGyver..."
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"Aunt Selma has one hour to live."
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"[ Glass Crunching ]"
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"[ Skipped item nr. 404 ]"
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"My best-laid plans have gang agley."
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"Bart, I must know..."
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"I'd hate to tell the number-one cop in town..."
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"how to do his job."
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"All right."
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"Sideshow Bob seemed desperate..."
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"except Aunt Selma."
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"[ Bart ] She happily watched MacGyver..."
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"unaware that her room..."
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"was silently filling with natural gas."
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"All it needed to explode..."
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"[ Selma ] I've decided..."
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"to give up smoking..."
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"When Aunt Selma lights up after MacGyver..."
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"she'll be blown to kingdom come."
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"[ Tires Squealing ]"
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"Oh, right, the gas."
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"Well, he fooled almost everyone..."
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"Now, let's get out of this gas-filled hallway..."
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"- before we all suffocate. - [ All Laughing ]"
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"- [People Chattering] - Shh."
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"It's like they saw our lives and put it up on screen."
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"so in desperation..."
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"I'd like you to meet--"
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"I'm afraid their reaction is understandable."
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"- I am not. - Yes, you are."
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"One: existence is suffering."
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"- [ Shrieking ] - [ Krusty Laughing ]"
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"When I was nominated for best supporting performer..."
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"This is one more Emmy than you'll ever win..."
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"In our overcrowded cell we became little more than beasts."
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"against the boy who put me there."
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"You can't take my Emmy."
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"of my slow boat to hell, and pointed it..."
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"in front of your family?"
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"[ Skipped item nr. 182 ]"
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"Krusty, can you ever forgive me for putting you in jail?"
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"but, brother, it ain't ketchup!"
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"When I was a kid..."
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"just before society crumbled."
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"- [ Door Slams ] - What did I miss?"
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"Would you two knock it off?"
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