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Clips from Bad Santa (2003)

"Jesus."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Fucking shit…"
Bad Santa (2003)
"Message one."
Bad Santa (2003)
"MAN: Mr. Soke?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"WOMAN: This is Dolores Axelrod. You ran into my car last week."
Bad Santa (2003)
"I called State Farm, but they have no record of any insurance policy for you."
Bad Santa (2003)
"In case you misplaced it, my phone number is 4..."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Willie, it's Marcus. It's that time of year again."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Jesus Christ!"
Bad Santa (2003)
"Harrison, just let me explain, please. Financially..."
Bad Santa (2003)
"You flip me for some stranger who'll do it for peanuts and who happens to work with a real midget."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Well let me tell you something. Nobody cares."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Nobody comes here for the elf. Santa's the attraction."
Bad Santa (2003)
"I do Burl Ives songs. Does this schmo even play guitar?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"Believe me, if it was, I..."
Bad Santa (2003)
"I don't think they like midget. I think you're supposed to call them..."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Oh, just forget it."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Hi. Bob Chipeska."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Welcome. Great photo and rÈsumÈ, by the way."
Bad Santa (2003)
"We'd like to think we do a good job."
Bad Santa (2003)
"MARCUS: Thanks."
Bad Santa (2003)
"We've been at this for years. You got nothing to worry about."
Bad Santa (2003)
"You two are the best men for this job, truly."
Bad Santa (2003)
"So don't let his unpleasantness affect your performance in any way."
Bad Santa (2003)
"- Oh, no. We're fine. - Performance?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"Performance, like sexual?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"Are you saying there's something wrong with my gear?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"- Is that what you're saying? - I'm sorry. Your gear? - Willie."
Bad Santa (2003)
"My fuck stick."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Hey, Willie. Take a seat. You know how your blood sugar is."
Bad Santa (2003)
"He’s such a cud that guy, he’s such a cud…"
Bad Santa (2003)
"No, no, no. It's a joke."
Bad Santa (2003)
"It's a joke. Just a joke."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Fuck stick?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"But his little friend promised he wouldn't say it in front of the children…"
Bad Santa (2003)
"which is fine. Because, you know, there is an adult world and a child's world, and that's okay."
Bad Santa (2003)
"- I'm no censor. - Little friend?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"Or midget."
Bad Santa (2003)
"I don't know what he's called exactly. But, uh, he's a little guy."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Little Billy Barty. God rest."
Bad Santa (2003)
"But thin fingers. Not the fat sausage fingers."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Yes. Uh, right."
Bad Santa (2003)
"So fuck stick. That's it?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"Merry Christmas!"
Bad Santa (2003)
"Yeah. He's back there drunk."
Bad Santa (2003)
"He's coming, guys. Santa will be here real soon."
Bad Santa (2003)
"God damn it!"
Bad Santa (2003)
"I don’t like that guy."
Bad Santa (2003)
"You blow this, and we're broke for the whole fucking year."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Now, put on your fucking hat and get out there."
Bad Santa (2003)
"And try to act professional, for Christ's sakes."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Get out of here. Next."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Oh, good. What do you want?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"- God damn it! - Nintendo Deer Hunter 3."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Blowing snot all over everybody and fucking whatever."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Next. Come on."
Bad Santa (2003)
"- Um, Santa? - Yeah, I'm Santa."
Bad Santa (2003)
"- Come on. What do you want? - Um, Barbie."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Say cheese."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Ow! Watch the toenails, kid! Shit. Next."
Bad Santa (2003)
"- What do you want? - Fraggle-Stick car."
Bad Santa (2003)
"- What the fuck is that? - Fraggle-Stick car."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Well, I heard you. Fraggle-Stick car. Fine."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Hey, check out this loser."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Hey, fat-ass. How you doing today?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"Hey, dipshit."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Dumb-ass, why don't you turn around?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"You know what? Fuck this."
Bad Santa (2003)
"WILLIE: Next."
Bad Santa (2003)
"I said next, God damn it. This is not the DMV, all right?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"Well, come on. What do you want? A snot-rag?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"Right. Another fucking Mongoloid."
Bad Santa (2003)
"- Don't fuck with my beard. - It's not real."
Bad Santa (2003)
"No shit."
Bad Santa (2003)
"- so I have to wear this fucking thing. - How did you get sick?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"No. It was her sister."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Now get the fuck out of my lap or tell me what you want."
Bad Santa (2003)
"- Like the suburbs. - Which one?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"Now, get off my lap. You sit there like a fucking retard."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Marcus, get this kid out of here. He's freaking me out."
Bad Santa (2003)
"I got to get a drink on. I'll see you tomorrow."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Yeah. Why don't you get going?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"Lollipop Guild, you asshole. Jesus!"
Bad Santa (2003)
"You saying something to me?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"Yeah. I'm gonna stick my whole fist up your ass."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Why don’t you fuck-off, you little shit."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Fuck you."
Bad Santa (2003)
"What?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"So, what do you do, you know... After the holidays, I mean."
Bad Santa (2003)
"You're pretty regular for a Santa."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Fuck me, Santa. Fuck me, Santa."
Bad Santa (2003)
"- Can't I at least take this hat off? - No!"
Bad Santa (2003)
"I've always had a thing for Santa Claus."
Bad Santa (2003)
"In case you didn't notice."
Bad Santa (2003)
"It's like some deep-seated childhood thing."
Bad Santa (2003)
"So is my thing for tits."
Bad Santa (2003)
"'Cause my dad was Jewish, and we didn't have Christmas."
Bad Santa (2003)
"So it was like this forbidden thing."
Bad Santa (2003)
"I like you."
Bad Santa (2003)
"- What the hell, buddy? - Buddy? I said I am not gay."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Yes. But that isn't what this is about."
Bad Santa (2003)
"- You're as queer as a $10 bill. - Oh really? Let me tell you something."
Bad Santa (2003)
"My brother lost a goddamn arm fighting you fuckers in Vietnam."
Bad Santa (2003)
"So I want you to look at my face one last fucking time."
Bad Santa (2003)
"- Elf fucker! - Motherfucker! - Turn around, elf fucker."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Who's the bitch now, Santy Claus? Huh?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"- Leave Santa alone! - Little boy, don't interfere."
Bad Santa (2003)
"- I am doing this for all of us. - Leave Santa alone!"
Bad Santa (2003)
"Good God."
Bad Santa (2003)
"Hey, you're that kid."
Bad Santa (2003)
"What the fuck are you doing here?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"- I’m not your fucking dada. - Uh-huh."
Bad Santa (2003)
"It's not like you helped me with that nutjob or anything. You know?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"Why do you need a car?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"- What the fuck are you talking about? - This car."
Bad Santa (2003)
"It's in the shop, getting repaired."
Bad Santa (2003)
"That way. Where's the stable?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"- Next to the shop. - How do they sleep?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"- Who? The reindeer? Standing up. - But the noise. How do they sleep?"
Bad Santa (2003)
"- What noise? - From the shop."
Bad Santa (2003)
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