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Clips from How I Met Your Mother - Cleaning House (S06E06)

"All right! I'll tell you."
How I Met Your Mother
"All of my childhood memories gone... [Snaps Fingers] just like that."
How I Met Your Mother
"What are you talking about? Your mother still lives in the house you grew up in."
How I Met Your Mother
"Anyway, I need you guys..."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Laughs]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Unsubscribe."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Laughing]"
How I Met Your Mother
"## [Upbeat Pop]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Whoa, Ted, that thing you're packing's way too big to fit in that box."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, dear. I thought I told you that's just not gonna fit in there."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh."
How I Met Your Mother
"Incredible lover. [Chuckles]"
How I Met Your Mother
"And then they see it, and it blows their freakin' mind."
How I Met Your Mother
"'Cause Cobra Kai Sensei's all, like, "Sweep the leg!""
How I Met Your Mother
"[Imitating Baby Talk] Who was a cute little basketball player..."
How I Met Your Mother
"Well, until they kicked me off the team."
How I Met Your Mother
"the coach asked me to quit because it wasn't fair to the other kids."
How I Met Your Mother
"Oh, yeah. He had, like, a four-foot vertical leap."
How I Met Your Mother
"My letter from the postmaster general."
How I Met Your Mother
"That's why none of your classmates showed up."
How I Met Your Mother
"Not because you threw up when they turned the lights off at the planetarium."
How I Met Your Mother
"All the other kids at school know who their dad is. Who's mine?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Yeah."
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"I..."
How I Met Your Mother
"There's a picture of me and Barney in an envelope addressed to him."
How I Met Your Mother
"For Yourson, North Dakota."
How I Met Your Mother
"I guess I never sent it. That's embarrassing."
How I Met Your Mother
"I don't know!"
How I Met Your Mother
"and I think you two would really hit it off.""
How I Met Your Mother
"Listen to me. There is no Yourson, North Dakota."
How I Met Your Mother
"He might be one of our fathers."
How I Met Your Mother
"Sam Gibbs might be."
How I Met Your Mother
"You are living in a dream world."
How I Met Your Mother
"Why don't I just go to the Chevy Web site and copy down adjectives?"
How I Met Your Mother
"Wait, wait."
How I Met Your Mother
"Just give me a second. Okay?"
How I Met Your Mother
"I just..."
How I Met Your Mother
"[Exhales]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Loretta. [Chuckling]"
How I Met Your Mother
"[Laughing]"
How I Met Your Mother
"Papa!"
How I Met Your Mother
"That is my younger brother, Barney."
How I Met Your Mother
"If Sam only knew Loretta for a few months, he couldn't possibly be Barney's father."
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"Or, uh, we could just let him have this one."
How I Met Your Mother
"Can't we just let the guy be black for a day?"
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"Man, I thought I was a light-skinned Caucasian..."
How I Met Your Mother
"# Won't you stand by # Hey!"
How I Met Your Mother
"[Cell Phone Chirping]"
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"You said Liz was a total 10."
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"Dad, look how fast I can run."
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"I always wanted to be enough for you boys."
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"I think that's why it always hurt..."
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"Are you sure?"
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""Dear Barney..."
How I Met Your Mother
"I already have a father."
How I Met Your Mother
"is Loretta."
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"So, this chick and I are going at it behind the Central Park Zoo."
How I Met Your Mother
"The bonobo chimps start giving us a standing "O.""
How I Met Your Mother
"And just when I'm about to give her the same thing... what up..."
How I Met Your Mother
"l-l... [Sighs]"
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"I can't. I just... I can't."
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"Guys, I know you count the minutes..."
How I Met Your Mother
"until you can escape from your humdrum lives by hearing how awesome mine is."
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"And I love doing that for you."
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"But I just can't tonight."
How I Met Your Mother
"- What's wrong? - I don't wanna talk about it."
How I Met Your Mother
"Okay. Hey, you guys see Deadliest Catch last night?"
How I Met Your Mother
"- Did I ever! - [Exclaiming]"
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"My mother is selling the house I grew up in."
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"That sucks. I've been there, buddy."
How I Met Your Mother
"With her new hippie husband Clint."
How I Met Your Mother
"The comfort of home is a little ruined when someone turns your old room..."
How I Met Your Mother
"into what I'm pretty sure is a tantric sex temple."
How I Met Your Mother
"With all the bamboo, pot smoke and '60s music..."
How I Met Your Mother
"it's like my old G. I. Joes are frozen in some weird Vietnam flashback."
How I Met Your Mother
"to come out to Staten Island on Saturday and help box everything up."
How I Met Your Mother
"You expect us to spend a whole day..."
How I Met Your Mother
"packing up your mom's house?"
How I Met Your Mother
"No, of course not. It's a two-day job."
How I Met Your Mother
"- Uh, pass. - Same."
How I Met Your Mother
"You guys are adorable."
How I Met Your Mother
"You seriously believe that I, Barney Stinson, can't talk you into this?"
How I Met Your Mother
"- I got the queen to give me a fist bump. - No one believes that story."
How I Met Your Mother
"You may be able to talk the brain surgeons you pick up into doing whatever you want..."
How I Met Your Mother
"but it's not gonna work on us."
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"[Sighs]"
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"Mmm."
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"[Knuckles Crack]"
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"[Clears Throat]"
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"How did he do that?"
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"## [Man Vocalizing]"
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"## [Ends]"
How I Met Your Mother
"[Ted Narrating] So there we were, helping Barney pack up his childhood home."
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"- Yeah, that's what your mom said. - How dare you!"
How I Met Your Mother
"No, she actually said that."
How I Met Your Mother
"Someone order something tall, dark and awesome?"
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"- Hey. - Bro!"
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"How you doin'?"
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"- Hey. - Oh, my goodness."
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"- Mama. - Look at my two sons."
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"So big and strong and handsome."
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"- Uh, Mom. - Stop."
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"And how is my delicious little grandson?"
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"- Oh, did he get the clothes I sent him? - Check it."
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"- Huh? Oh! - Ah!"
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"How cute is that, right?"
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"When was the last time you saw..."
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"a diaper poking out of a Dolce & Gabbana suit?"
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"Tuesday, at work."
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"Some of the senior partners are really getting up there."
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"So, Ted, yesterday at work..."
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"I totally talked you up to that super-hot make-up girl Liz."
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"Oh, yeah? What'd you say?"
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"Oh, you know, how funny you are."
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"- Guilty. - Handsome."
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"Who, me?"
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"- Really? - Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah."
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"I was all, like..."
How I Met Your Mother
"he knows a woman's body better than she knows her own."
How I Met Your Mother
"Endless waves of pleasure..."
How I Met Your Mother
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