You're not connected to the Internet. Please check your connection.

Clips from How I Met Your Mother (2005) - Romance (S05E05)

"(CRYING SOFTLY)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(HICCUPS)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(CRYING) I will never love again."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"No, Marshall, you must."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And after an appropriate number of years,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"someone like that busty delivery girl from that one time,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"and plow her like a cornfield."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(MARSHALL MOANING)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And so, Marshall, to honor Lily, you must find"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"that busty delivery girl from that one time"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"and plow her like a cornfield."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(CLEARING THROAT)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Delivery for Marshall Eriksen."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"This one's for you, Lil."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Where do I sign?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And then watch out, because it is on!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"That is the saddest thing I've ever heard."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Dude, Lily gets you in real life."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- She has no business in your fantasies. - It's all I know, okay?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- I can't help it. - I accept your invitation. Marshall Eriksen,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"from this day forward, I will be the wingman of your mind."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Now, focus on the next dancer. Put Lily completely out of your mind."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"ANNOUNCER: Gentlemen, say hello to (STAMMERING) Jasmine."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(CROWD CHEERING)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Barney?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Is it just me or does that stripper look exactly like..."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Ted, we found a stripper who looks exactly like Lily!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Uh, yeah, I can't talk right now. - I'm speechless, too."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Oh, I will."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"But first, I'm going to make Marshall watch as I wedge Ulysses S. Grant"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(BARNEY YELLING)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Sorry about that. - So, any thoughts on food?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Yeah, do you wanna share the oysters?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I would love to share the oysters."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Good. 'Cause if you didn't, that would be mighty shellfish."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Wow, that's bad."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"That's why it's funny!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- We've been on this date before. - We've been on this date before."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"We've been on this exact blind date before."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Correct me if I'm wrong, but I don't remember that date going that well."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Me, neither."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I remember thinking that you were a little snobby."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Wait, you dress your cats up in weird costumes."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"They're not weird. See, you're being snobby again."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Oh, my God. Do you realize what this means?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Since our first date, we've done a complete lap"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"of all the single people in New York"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"only to end up back here, with each other."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Whoa."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"We're going to die alone, aren't we?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"This is insane."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Wait, I gotta ask. Why did you think I was snobby?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Wait, okay, yeah, we were sitting over there."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Good to know we're not getting the crappy understudy lobsters, right?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Pointing out spelling errors in a menu makes you seem kind of snooty."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Huh."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I had no idea."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Okay, well, what about me? Aside from the cats,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"how did I come across?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"The check came and, of course, I was going to pay,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Huh."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"You know what we should do? We should retrace the rest of that night"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"and figure out what else we do wrong on first dates."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"'Cause let's be honest. We are scaring people off, Jen."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- We really are. Okay, I'm in. - Great."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Where'd we go next?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- I think we went to MacLaren's. - Okay."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And then, there's Tabby-Gail Adams, the jester of the group."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"You will not believe who we saw tonight."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Dude... - We saw the third doppelganger!"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(GASPING)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"OLDER TED: I should explain. Over the years, we had spotted two strangers"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"who looked exactly like members of our group."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(ALL CHATTERING)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(LILY LAUGHING)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"OLDER TED: And Mustache Marshall."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"By the following summer, we would find the remaining two doppelgangers,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"but I'll get to that."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"but she looks just like you."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And there was a stripper who looked exactly like me?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Awesome! I bet the guys were going crazy."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I bet they wanted to touch her so bad, but all you can do is look,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"unless you go into the back room, but, honey, you gotta pay for that."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(VOICE SHAKING) Marshall made me go."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"All right, so what did I do wrong next? Let me have it. I'm here to learn."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Well, I kept dropping hints that I was cold, but you didn't offer me your jacket."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Really? I can't feel my fingers."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'm pretty impervious to stuff like that."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I couldn't admit I was cold. I didn't want to seem like a wimp"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"compared to your action hero ex-boyfriend who you wouldn't stop talking about."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"After a day of fighting fires,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Jim would love to come home and unwind working on his '68 Camaro."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"That or bare-knuckle boxing, which he learned in the Marine Corps."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I had an aunt in the Coast Guard."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"(JEN LAUGHING)"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I bet stripper me would get in there with another girl and just go bananas."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"See, Marshall? We got to have a bros' night at a strip club"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"and both of our ladies are totally cool with it."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"I'm not cool with it."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Because they understand that it's healthy for us to do that from time to time."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- It's disgusting. - Because it's harmless."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Did one of your whores tell you that?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And, Lil, Marshall shouldn't have to go to so much trouble"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"just to have an innocent fantasy."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- Marshall, tell her. We're all friends here. - (LAUGHING) No, we're not."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Lily, sometimes I think about other women. Okay, it happens."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"But even when I do, I feel so guilty"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"that I... I have to imagine you passing away first"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"because even in a fantasy world, I could never cheat on you."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"You're just my life, baby, and I love you."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"but could you maybe not murder me?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"We're, like, this close to a cure."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"We went in here for a drink with your friends, who I loved."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Or hated, depending on whether you're still friends with them."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"- You love them. - They're family, Ted."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"And they are my best friends,"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Did he juggle? Bad puns?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Expect a standing ovation for picking up a $19 check?"
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Let's not forget the menu typo gold mine."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
"Keep panning that river, buddy."
How I Met Your Mother (2005)
Show more clips