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Clips from The Boondocks - The Story of Lando Freeman (S03E03)

"Yeah."
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"Where's this guy been all our lives, huh?"
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"See you later."
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"What do you want from me?"
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"My mother left a journal."
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"She said she got pregnant by a man she loved very much,"
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"whose nickname was Lando. And there was this."
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"Man, I ain't come here to steal nothing from you, man."
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"I just wanted to find my pops and tell him"
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"I just wanted to tell him I love him very much,"
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"You too ugly to be my son. Oh, okay. I-I get it."
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"The problem ain't having a son,"
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"I want you out of this neighborhood"
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"and out of my life forever. You got that?"
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"I ain't in no rush. I ain't even tripping."
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"I love you, Pops. I ain't never gonna stop loving you."
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"I'm sorry to stop by on such short notice."
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"I'm here to help. So you need a person, uh, removed?"
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"Yes. You mean, like,"
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"removed from the Earth?"
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"No. I mean like removed from the neighborhood."
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"Oh-ho-ho, so you want him kidnapped."
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"Well, kinda. Not really."
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"Can't you just take him someplace really far away"
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"like South America or Africa or something?"
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"there's nothing preventing him from coming back."
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"Well, if you took him really far away,"
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"he wouldn't have enough money to come back."
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"I don't know. I just want him to go away."
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"Okay, okay, okay, okay, back up."
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"Who we talking about?"
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"His name is Lando. Oh, shit, Lando?"
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"The new handyman?"
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"Man, that motherfucker is cold with that landscaping."
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"What's your beef with him? He's a con man"
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"pretending to be my son. Oh, I see."
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"But he ain't your son? He is absolutely, positively,"
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"Shit, he seemed cool to me."
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"You know how some people you just like right off the bat?"
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"But yeah, shit, I say kill him."
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"All right, all right, the only other choice might be"
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"to get one of them DNA tests"
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"to prove you ain't the father."
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"Really? Where do you get one of those tests done?"
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"Oh, I know one place that do it for free."
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"Coming up next,"
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"Moms always said his nickname was Lando."
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"Didn't you? Answer me! Stand up!"
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"Get your ass up."
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"What kind of man doesn't bother to see his kid"
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"B- But I didn't know... You know what I wanna do?"
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"I wanna beat the living shit out of you!"
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"Whoa, easy there, big fella."
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"I fucking hate you!"
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"You make me wanna..."
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"And the results of the DNA test are..."
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"Robert,"
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"you are the father."
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"You are the sack from..."
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"That's the... That's the pair that I came from."
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"I came out that tube right there."
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"Good-looking man. Yes."
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"How you feel now? Deadbeat. Huh?"
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"Wait, I didn't know. I... I..."
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"You finally gonna take responsibility"
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"or are you gonna keep making excuses, you pussy punk bitch?"
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"Look at him. He is a pussy punk bitch."
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"I hate to say this, Granddad,"
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"You should have stuck with your story."
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"It was a DNA test. Well, study next time."
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"I can't believe all this time, a son."
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"A son named Lando."
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"Granddad, it's not all your fault."
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"This doesn't make you a horrible person."
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"It's all your fucking fault!"
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"You're a horrible fucking person!"
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"Oh, why me? Why did he do this to me?"
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"Granddad, it seems like he just wants the chance"
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"to get to know his dad. Which means you have to be a man"
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"and own up to this."
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"but you do owe him that."
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"Man, I say be a real nigga"
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"and don't own up to nothing."
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"You got it right the first time."
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"Pretend it never happened."
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"Who cares about the show?"
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"Anybody asks, it ain't yours."
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"Congratulations, Daddy. Oh, you must be so proud."
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"You know, Robert, any boy can make a baby,"
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"but it takes a real man..."
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"Shut the fuck up. I'm sick of this shit."
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"You also told me to go on that stupid show."
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"Hey, you ain't tell me you was actually"
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"the man's daddy. That's bad intel."
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"I didn't know I was his daddy."
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"Now everybody knows. What am I supposed to do?"
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"Way I see it, you got two options. Option one,"
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"which I don't recommend, is to work it out."
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"No, but it's a option."
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"You guys are both grown,"
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"you try to come to terms with it. Get to know each other,"
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"make up for some lost time. Now, I ain't saying"
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"it's gonna be a easy adjustment,"
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"but, I mean, there's counseling, therapy."
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"This person could enrich your life"
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"Yeah, Huey said something like that."
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"But I never listen to him. Now, I still say"
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"which is just let me put two in the back his head"
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"and be done with it. Huh? No."
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"Hey, hey, hey, hey, don't worry about the fee."
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"I ain't gonna rape you on the price."
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"You ain't got to worry about that."
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"No. I don't want you to kill him."
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"Maybe I should just work it out."
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"Look, I can name at least two or three instances"
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"by trying to find some mutual understanding,"
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"and I can tell you it's always faster"
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"and easier to just kill 'em. It just is."
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"Don't know why you keep bringing it up."
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"All right, up to you,"
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