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Clips from Mr. Mayor - Pilot (S01E01)

"but you won mayor."
Mr. Mayor
"- What do you mean she tried?"
Mr. Mayor
"- Before this, I used to work at the Board of Elections."
Mr. Mayor
"She didn't have enough signatures"
Mr. Mayor
"to get on the ballot. She was pretty furious."
Mr. Mayor
"And before that, I worked at a Jamba Juice,"
Mr. Mayor
"and people got mad there too."
Mr. Mayor
"- She wants to be mayor. - Great news, sir."
Mr. Mayor
"I did a deep dive on Arpi Meskimen,"
Mr. Mayor
"and it turns out, she--"
Mr. Mayor
"- Wanted to be mayor, but couldn't get on the ballot."
Mr. Mayor
"Jayden already told me. Try to keep up with him."
Mr. Mayor
"This is good."
Mr. Mayor
"Now I know what I'm dealing with."
Mr. Mayor
"We're banning plastic straws. - But Meskimen--"
Mr. Mayor
"- We'll give her something she wants even more."
Mr. Mayor
"[uplifting music]"
Mr. Mayor
"- What?"
Mr. Mayor
"- He's gonna let her be mayor. Try and keep up."
Mr. Mayor
"both: Good morning."
Mr. Mayor
"- I came up here planning to quit."
Mr. Mayor
"- Regarding yesterday's policy announcement--"
Mr. Mayor
"- But looking into the faces of people I respect"
Mr. Mayor
"and seeing the look in his eyes--their eyes,"
Mr. Mayor
"a lot of different eyes. Anyways, I realized--"
Mr. Mayor
"- Nothing I do is gonna please everyone."
Mr. Mayor
"And I'm not here to please people."
Mr. Mayor
"- I do what I think is right."
Mr. Mayor
"both: The straw ban stands."
Mr. Mayor
"- And if you don't like it,"
Mr. Mayor
"you can suck it."
Mr. Mayor
"And not through a straw."
Mr. Mayor
"I look forward to being your sophomore class president."
Mr. Mayor
"[cheers and applause] [microphone feedback]"
Mr. Mayor
"- However, I also know that it's my job"
Mr. Mayor
"to listen to all the voices in this great city,"
Mr. Mayor
"so I'm pleased to announce that I've appointed one deputy mayor"
Mr. Mayor
"in charge of public outreach, opposition research,"
Mr. Mayor
"and mini wolf reproductive services."
Mr. Mayor
"You may now direct your questions"
Mr. Mayor
"to Deputy Mayor Arpi Meskimen."
Mr. Mayor
"[applause]"
Mr. Mayor
"- Thank you, Mayor Bremer. [chuckles bashfully]"
Mr. Mayor
"I hereby resign my seat on the City Council"
Mr. Mayor
"in order to accept this position."
Mr. Mayor
"And I think it is admirable of the mayor"
Mr. Mayor
"to surround himself with people who dislike him so very much."
Mr. Mayor
"Before I take your questions,"
Mr. Mayor
"I really want you to think about if your question is dumb."
Mr. Mayor
"all: Ms. Meskimen! Ms. Meskimen!"
Mr. Mayor
"- Yes, glasses, go. - I don't get it."
Mr. Mayor
"Why would Meskimen give up a seat on the council"
Mr. Mayor
"to work under Neil?"
Mr. Mayor
"- Because she thinks he'll implode,"
Mr. Mayor
"and then she'll be mayor,"
Mr. Mayor
"but he's not planning on giving her that chance."
Mr. Mayor
"- He used her own ambition against her."
Mr. Mayor
"Pretty smart."
Mr. Mayor
"All right. I'll give this a try."
Mr. Mayor
"Because of my love of the city."
Mr. Mayor
"- You just found out we get full health insurance?"
Mr. Mayor
"- Yeah, I can finally break up with that gross doctor."
Mr. Mayor
"- Are we going forward with the straw ban?"
Mr. Mayor
"Yes."
Mr. Mayor
"The mayor stands by his offer"
Mr. Mayor
"to provide angled, steel straws to those who need them."
Mr. Mayor
"For all other parties, the city will provide"
Mr. Mayor
"a free educational video"
Mr. Mayor
"demonstrating how to tilt fluid out of a cup"
Mr. Mayor
"and suck it in with your mouth."
Mr. Mayor
"You will find it at LAtiltandsuck.org/mouth."
Mr. Mayor
"Next dumb question."
Mr. Mayor
"[doorknob clicks] [door closes]"
Mr. Mayor
"- So I saw your press conference."
Mr. Mayor
"- Look, honey, I'm sorry if it makes your life harder."
Mr. Mayor
"I really am, but--"
Mr. Mayor
"- You don't give up. I get it."
Mr. Mayor
"Also, I have to be at school early tomorrow."
Mr. Mayor
"'Cause I'm kind of class president, so..."
Mr. Mayor
"- [chuckles]"
Mr. Mayor
"Thank you for telling me that."
Mr. Mayor
"- I've got homework."
Mr. Mayor
"Love you. - Love you."
Mr. Mayor
"[hopeful music]"
Mr. Mayor
"[chuckles]"
Mr. Mayor
"♪"
Mr. Mayor
"Wait."
Mr. Mayor
"We're hosting the Olympics?"
Mr. Mayor
"- Good night, everybody! - Good night!"
Mr. Mayor