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Clips from Scrubs - My Tuscaloosa Heart (S01E01)

"- Like what? - I don't know."
Scrubs
"''I heard your songs and they're extraordinary''?"
Scrubs
"Excuse me?"
Scrubs
"You swore!"
Scrubs
"You know what? Just forget it."
Scrubs
"Actually, the music came before Bunny."
Scrubs
"But things didn't take off until I moved to Memphis."
Scrubs
"Then I met the Colonel, and the hits just kept coming."
Scrubs
"But it went to my head. I gained a lot of weight, started wearing jumpsuits"
Scrubs
"Or did I?"
Scrubs
"- You never played the guitar? - That crap is for hippies!"
Scrubs
"Now, for God's sake, get back to work."
Scrubs
"Thank you very much."
Scrubs
"Looks like you screwed the pooch there."
Scrubs
"But if you're wondering whether or not you treated Mr Simon differently"
Scrubs
"because he's a complete jerk, well,"
Scrubs
"I think you know the answer to that one."
Scrubs
"in front of my ex-wife, not ten minutes ago."
Scrubs
"It's always easy to treat the nice ones nice, isn't it?"
Scrubs
"But your drug addicts, your child abusers,"
Scrubs
"You know, it's barely misting out."
Scrubs
"It's my hair. If it even gets damp,"
Scrubs
"hell, as a human being,"
Scrubs
"is by making sure you don't repeat the same mistakes over and over."
Scrubs
"That was really great, but next time, would you not look me in the eye?"
Scrubs
"It gets in the way of what I come here to do."
Scrubs
"- That's classy. - Wait a minute."
Scrubs
"You don't have to go, you know, if you don't want to."
Scrubs
"All right. I'll toss you a quickie, but no talking."
Scrubs
"The worst thing about being a doctor is you fall short a lot."
Scrubs
"The best part is that, if you wait for a few seconds,"
Scrubs
"Woke up this morning"
Scrubs
"Without you"
Scrubs
"Oh, it ain't just"
Scrubs
"And there's nothin' I can do but close my eyes"
Scrubs
"And dream about you"
Scrubs
"Dr Kelso, your wife is on line one."
Scrubs
"Yeah. No, yeah. I'll do it as soon as I get home."
Scrubs
"I guess hanging up on me is the right thing to do."
Scrubs
"Good night, Number Two."
Scrubs
"Nothing."
Scrubs
"Nothing."
Scrubs
"Jackpot."
Scrubs
"< French TeAm > www.V2.Frigorifix.com"
Scrubs
"and I'll just be JD Number Two?"
Scrubs
"When they see how much you care, they're grateful."
Scrubs
"Maybe we shouldn't bother."
Scrubs
"Frank was a Navy SEAL."
Scrubs
"You are brave. You're an attending here."
Scrubs
"I'm not gonna give away everything,"
Scrubs
"but I will say it involves wine, an amazing dinner"
Scrubs
"- Don't scratch. - Unless they're really itchy."
Scrubs
"- I hate you. - I hate you too."
Scrubs
"Fair enough."
Scrubs
"but I was hoping we could do an ERCP first."
Scrubs
"- You guys awake? - Holy son-of-a-cracker!"
Scrubs
"Not now. Maybe in the morning before work."
Scrubs
"Just thought I'd talk to you guys."
Scrubs
"But most importantly, it's where you can lie back,"
Scrubs
"Have a good one, killer."
Scrubs
"and it's because of how great you are and how much that scares me."
Scrubs
"My Bunny is a Baby Blue"
Scrubs
"Yeah, I know."
Scrubs
"I'm a '''K''? What the hell does that mean?"
Scrubs
"but I was kinda hoping we could take a closer look at me."
Scrubs
"Then how come I still can't sleep?"
Scrubs
"That's too bad. I liked her."
Scrubs
"Then, in 1977, I died on the toilet."
Scrubs
"Cos I know when he says I didn't do anything wrong, I'll believe it."
Scrubs
"- Depends what you mean by ''different''. - I have to warn you, I just got dumped"
Scrubs
"- I'll talk if I want to. - Be quiet."
Scrubs
"The skies that's blue"
Scrubs
"You'd never do anything to hurt a patient. You know that."
Scrubs
"was both adequate and well within normal limits."
Scrubs
"And then you go to town. You go nuts. You do your thing."
Scrubs
"Relax. I came by for a board meeting"
Scrubs
"If you don't believe me, ask Jordan."
Scrubs
"post-divorce sex as much as the next guy you marry will,"
Scrubs
"That was terrible. Can I have a do-over?"
Scrubs
"- Beat it, junior. - Toodles."
Scrubs
"Tell me about this girl you like."
Scrubs
"you take your pants off. Them's the rules of the booty call."
Scrubs
"creative, vulnerable side to him."
Scrubs
"Newbie, the only way to judge your growth as a doctor,"
Scrubs
"- Hey, Number Two! - Stop doing that."
Scrubs
"- Like what? - For starters, you are very hot."
Scrubs
"There's horrible people right in here."
Scrubs
"Gotta be boobs somewhere."
Scrubs
"Hey, Number One. How ya doing?"
Scrubs
"Hmm."
Scrubs
"Hey, Number Two!"
Scrubs
"It's getting hot, Red Bird. Pull me out."
Scrubs
"The music's not that bad."
Scrubs
"Anyway, I'll probably need your help getting your dresser up on the roof."
Scrubs
"Morning, killer."
Scrubs
"- I won't. - Pinkie swear."
Scrubs
"it frizzes out and becomes wildly unmanageable."
Scrubs
"I'm a ''K''."
Scrubs
"Are you bummed that we have the same name?"
Scrubs
"This'll be fun. JD, I would like you to meet JD."
Scrubs
"The best part about working here is the patients."
Scrubs
"This isn't it. I had them leave yours where it was."
Scrubs
"Jordan gets sex."
Scrubs
"Dr Turk is here cos his patient is going into surgery tomorrow,"
Scrubs
"But, from now on, if you want,"
Scrubs
"We have concluded that his pain control"
Scrubs
"Dr Kelso isn't looking to do me any favours."
Scrubs
"Moving furniture with that nurse you have a crush on? That's your 100% ?"
Scrubs
"Why don't we just say something to him?"
Scrubs
"I learned to play the guitar growing up as a young rapscallion in Mississippi."
Scrubs
"You're unbelievable."
Scrubs
"and ate tranquillisers like they were trail mix."
Scrubs
"your garden-variety jerks..."
Scrubs
"Dear God."
Scrubs