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Clips from Parks and Recreation (2009) - Eagleton (S03E03)

"climbing that fence."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Both your arms are broken."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"All due respect, I recognize that boy."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"He was caught selling fireworks to Eagleton kids."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"This is a perfect example of how we're going to help you."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Here's to you, Joey, and your mother"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and to every Pawnee citizen who might have a bright future"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"if they fundamentally change everything about themselves."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Thanks to Leslie Knope. I'm not done."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Isn't she trying her hardest?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I'm only gonna ask you this once."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"What is going on with my birthday?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Happy Birthday. Shut your damn mouth."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"This is a fun conversation."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Just tell me what Leslie is planning."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Why don't you tell me what she did for your last birthday?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Oh, well, that was intense."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"She totally surprised me."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"She kidnapped me from work,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and then she took me to that place, Señor Vega's,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"you know, where the mariachi band comes out."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"They put a big sombrero on you, and then everybody sings "Happy Birthday"?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"And then we went back to my house,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and she invited basically everyone I knew,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Ugh."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"which is genius, 'cause I had no idea it was coming."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"And then there was a bouncy castle."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Did you know they made those for adults?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Mmm-hmm."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Maybe I'll change it up this time. Can I try the andouille sausage?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Tom, let's go. What? No."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"It's gross. I don't like it. It's disgusting."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"There's an iPod touch in here."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"And you said no? Are you insane?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I talked it over with Lindsay, and we made a pact"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"that we would stay in Pawnee together"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and work hard and fight to make Pawnee a better place to live."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"And then they offered her the job, and she took it and disappeared."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Wow."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Verbena-scented soy candles!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You want me to do what, now?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and make her take April and freeze their bank accounts."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I don't understand. Is Leslie's work unsatisfactory?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"No, it has nothing to do with her work."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I don't want to get into it."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You know you can talk to me about anything."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Well, it's my birthday on Friday."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Hey! Happy Birthday."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I'm ending this right now. I'm just gonna leave early and go home."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Unless..."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"That's exactly what she wants me to do."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"All right, everybody just grab a bag and open it up"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and then try to find some dirty stuff in there."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Eagleton treats us like garbage. We're gonna treat them like garbage."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"We're gonna take these bags of trash,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and we're gonna throw it over to their side of the park."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"And then we're just gonna let the stink and the raccoons run wild."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Well, isn't that just playing right into what they think of you?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Oh, my God. What am I thinking? Let's just stop this."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Put everything back in the truck."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Wow."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I didn't expect to see the whole Parks Department here,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"although it is, sadly, one of the nicest spots in town."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I am so sick of this, Lindsay."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You listen to me, Lindsay Carlisle Shay."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Why don't you take your fancy dog,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and if you have any job openings,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"maybe you should let me know about 'em."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Come on, man. No!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I'm sick of being treated"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"like I'm not willing to relocate to Eagleton, because I am!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"So here's what you could do, lady."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Take this resume"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and shove it into your human resources slot."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You might have a fancy car and a mahogany purse,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"You're a Pawnee girl."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"No, Leslie, I'm not."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Well, then why do you come here at dinnertime"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and get takeout from the legendary J.J.'s Diner?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"It's not for me."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Don't you dare"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"feed that waffle to that dog to get it to poop."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Sambuca need to make?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Leslie. How dare you?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"No!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Garbage fight!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Ugh!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I want her arrested for attempted murder."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"For God's sake, Knope. Get a grip."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Thank God you're here!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I want her arrested!"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"She attacked me,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and then she hurled my Kate Spade headband somewhere."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"that we don't want to make a federal case out of this,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"so I suggest you both apologize to each other,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and we pretend this never happened."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I will never apologize to her."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- Nor I her. - "Nor I her.""
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I doth proclaim to be a stupid fartface."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Nice retort. Did G.B. Shaw write that for you?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Did G.B. Shaw write your stupid fartface?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Ladies, if you don't apologize,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"we're gonna have to toss the both of you in jail."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"So just swallow your pride..."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Say you're sorry."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"We hope you enjoy your evening here"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"at the Eagleton holding cell."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Can I offer you anything... herbal tea, Greek yogurt?"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"No."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Morning, Ron."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Ooh, dude, you forgot to put a shirt on."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"I do it all the time. It's fine."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"- I slept here. - Sweet."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Birthday, birthday, birthday"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Decisions, decisions."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"if a person is a jerk."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"and I will beat her senseless with a baseball bat."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Yeah, I did that for Ann."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"a lot of job offers in your life,"
Parks and Recreation (2009)
"Let's back it up. No, no, no, no."
Parks and Recreation (2009)
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