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Clips from Brooklyn Nine-Nine - Operation: Broken Feather (S01E01)

Yeah, good day.

"Yeah, good day."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Hell yeah, it is.

"Hell yeah, it is."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

What?

"What?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You love processing... It's your favorite thing,

"You love processing... It's your favorite thing,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

And I kinda wish I hadn't said it,

"And I kinda wish I hadn't said it,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Scully, what are you doing at my desk?

"Scully, what are you doing at my desk?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

And working?

"And working?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The Captain put me here.

"The Captain put me here."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Can you believe that?

"Can you believe that?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Santiago wants to make Captain one day.

"Santiago wants to make Captain one day."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

They have each other's back, no matter what.

"They have each other's back, no matter what."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Dude. Dude, fire.

"Dude. Dude, fire."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

My fringe!

"My fringe!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The problem is, we didn't take Peralta into account.

"The problem is, we didn't take Peralta into account."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

In our next trial...

"In our next trial..."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Please, I'm open to any ideas about efficiency.

"Please, I'm open to any ideas about efficiency."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I've narrowed the problem down to one location:

"I've narrowed the problem down to one location:"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Things would go a lot faster if the two of you

"Things would go a lot faster if the two of you"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I don't. You are both dead to me.

"I don't. You are both dead to me."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Well, I suppose it's possible

"Well, I suppose it's possible"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

we may have been a tad enthusiastic

"we may have been a tad enthusiastic"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Jeffords and I will get right to work.

"Jeffords and I will get right to work."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Get the hell out of my chair.

"Get the hell out of my chair."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I was the bad partner.

"I was the bad partner."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I mean, sometimes it sucks.

"I mean, sometimes it sucks."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

So when you said you were gonna leave,

"So when you said you were gonna leave,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I freaked out, and that was dumb.

"I freaked out, and that was dumb."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

and they'd be lucky to have you.

"and they'd be lucky to have you."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

There's no way there's four "m"s in that word, right?

"There's no way there's four "m"s in that word, right?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

In the end, you were right. I don't wanna sit at a desk.

"In the end, you were right. I don't wanna sit at a desk."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

No, I take back all of the things I just said.

"No, I take back all of the things I just said."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Uh-uh. You said I was a good Detective,

"Uh-uh. You said I was a good Detective,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Lookee, lookee.

"Lookee, lookee."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

All right, everybody just calm down.

"All right, everybody just calm down."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Here, I brought you a peace offering.

"Here, I brought you a peace offering."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Yeah!

"Yeah!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You don't have to dance every time.

"You don't have to dance every time."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You have one play.

"You have one play."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Peralta.

"Peralta."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I can never tell.

"I can never tell."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

He is in the interrogation room as we speak,

"He is in the interrogation room as we speak,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

sitting and, I assume, stewing.

"sitting and, I assume, stewing."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

because, you see...

"because, you see..."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You got him, babe.

"You got him, babe."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Oh. I've been chasing this guy for three months.

"Oh. I've been chasing this guy for three months."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Are those gummy bears wrapped in a fruit roll-up?

"Are those gummy bears wrapped in a fruit roll-up?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I pity your dentist.

"I pity your dentist."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

It's over.

"It's over."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Thanks, guys. I got it from here.

"Thanks, guys. I got it from here."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Don't worry, we can stall him until you get the confession.

"Don't worry, we can stall him until you get the confession."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

All right, hands in.

"All right, hands in."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I don't have a lot of time.

"I don't have a lot of time."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

We have four minutes. We can do this.

"We have four minutes. We can do this."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

'Cause all I see is turds.

"'Cause all I see is turds."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Lucky for you, this wipes off quickly.

"Lucky for you, this wipes off quickly."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The vulture still flies. The vulture still flies.

"The vulture still flies. The vulture still flies."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The case of how you got so damn sexy.

"The case of how you got so damn sexy."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Case solved.

"Case solved."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Someone do something.

"Someone do something."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I'll just go then...

"I'll just go then..."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

With this fully signed confession.

"With this fully signed confession."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Suck it, vulture.

"Suck it, vulture."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I killed that guy and his neighbor,

"I killed that guy and his neighbor,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

but you were too late.

"but you were too late."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Whoo! Wait, you killed his neighbor?

"Whoo! Wait, you killed his neighbor?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Nice, you got it framed? Of course.

"Nice, you got it framed? Of course."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

the greatest day in human history.

"the greatest day in human history."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

most humans say "hello"

"most humans say "hello""

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

at the beginning of a conversation.

"at the beginning of a conversation."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Manager at the prentiss hotel told us that

"Manager at the prentiss hotel told us that"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

someone's been breaking into the rooms,

"someone's been breaking into the rooms,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

What?

"What?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I have to admit, I do love a thorough vacuumer.

"I have to admit, I do love a thorough vacuumer."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I know.

"I know."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

All right, let's get started.

"All right, let's get started."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

So we have good news, and we have bad news.

"So we have good news, and we have bad news."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

My Nana always said, "bad news first,

"My Nana always said, "bad news first,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Good news is, the sting we set up

"Good news is, the sting we set up"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

to catch deadbeats went great.

"to catch deadbeats went great."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Oh, man, can't it wait till I get back from the Bahamas?

"Oh, man, can't it wait till I get back from the Bahamas?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Now I know you'd all prefer to go to a bar,

"Now I know you'd all prefer to go to a bar,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

drink beer, and eat chips of various textures.

"drink beer, and eat chips of various textures."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

But our compstat numbers are due tomorrow morning,

"But our compstat numbers are due tomorrow morning,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

so I need these arrests on the books today.

"so I need these arrests on the books today."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Tonight was Egyptian undulation.

"Tonight was Egyptian undulation."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Sure. Dismissed.

"Sure. Dismissed."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

For example, somebody

"For example, somebody"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

used the toaster in front of Boyle.

"used the toaster in front of Boyle."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

No. No, no, no, no. Tommy?

"No. No, no, no, no. Tommy?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Get me out of here, man.

"Get me out of here, man."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I'm worried.

"I'm worried."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The compstat numbers are due tomorrow at 9:00 A.M.,

"The compstat numbers are due tomorrow at 9:00 A.M.,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

but at this rate, we won't be finished

"but at this rate, we won't be finished"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

until your daughters are grown and married.

"until your daughters are grown and married."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

We need to compstat the office.

"We need to compstat the office."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

It's just using data

"It's just using data"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

to identify problem spots in the neighborhood.

"to identify problem spots in the neighborhood."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

on points of friction in this office for years.

"on points of friction in this office for years."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

If we can fix these problems

"If we can fix these problems"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

we will finish on time.

"we will finish on time."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Are you saying you want to secretly perform

"Are you saying you want to secretly perform"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

scientific experiments on your friends

"scientific experiments on your friends"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Hey, hand me some peanuts. I'm snacky.

"Hey, hand me some peanuts. I'm snacky."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You're gonna go work for the vulture?

"You're gonna go work for the vulture?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

And they only increase in value.

"And they only increase in value."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I guess that's your new best friend now, Santiago.

"I guess that's your new best friend now, Santiago."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Emphasis on "iago," backstabber.

"Emphasis on "iago," backstabber."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I'm surprised you've read othello.

"I'm surprised you've read othello."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

What the hell's othello?

"What the hell's othello?"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I wouldn't be working for the vulture.

"I wouldn't be working for the vulture."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

We're gonna catch this perp.

"We're gonna catch this perp."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

You're gonna skip that interview.

"You're gonna skip that interview."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

you could dunk a basketball.

"you could dunk a basketball."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

The subtext of the guarantee was that

"The subtext of the guarantee was that"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

you would be entertained, and you were.

"you would be entertained, and you were."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Let's go!

"Let's go!"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

of a few obvious problems.

"of a few obvious problems."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

I moved the toaster to the break room,

"I moved the toaster to the break room,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

far away from Boyle.

"far away from Boyle."

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

Good. What's this red area here,

"Good. What's this red area here,"

Brooklyn Nine-Nine

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