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Clips from BoJack Horseman - The Telescope (S01E01)

"This is our breakfast for June."
BoJack Horseman
"Pretend you don't speak English."
BoJack Horseman
"Buongiorno. Bon Jovi."
BoJack Horseman
"Salutations. Crap, that's English."
BoJack Horseman
"Herb's about to hit the big time,"
BoJack Horseman
"and I'm just gonna be a small-fry"
BoJack Horseman
"doing tiny commercials and eating mini quiches."
BoJack Horseman
"You're dead wrong."
BoJack Horseman
"Herb says that to me all the time."
BoJack Horseman
"- He thinks the world of you. - He does?"
BoJack Horseman
"Yeah, I'm not worried about if you'll become a star."
BoJack Horseman
"Well, make up your mind, lady."
BoJack Horseman
"Look over there. See those tar pits?"
BoJack Horseman
"No, BoJack, it's a metaphor."
BoJack Horseman
"Whoa, whoa, whoa. Really?"
BoJack Horseman
"- Does Herb know? - Yeah."
BoJack Horseman
"I'm going to miss you, Charlotte."
BoJack Horseman
"Would you have made a move on me?"
BoJack Horseman
"- Charlotte... - I don't think you would have."
BoJack Horseman
"Now go stuff some prosciutto in your pants"
BoJack Horseman
"before that Webster kid takes it all."
BoJack Horseman
"Why did you bring me to Griffith Park?"
BoJack Horseman
"- I hate that title. - He had several causes."
BoJack Horseman
"Wow, I didn't realize"
BoJack Horseman
"there were so many day hookers."
BoJack Horseman
"and have everything we've ever wanted,"
BoJack Horseman
"I'm not fully on board with this new high five thing."
BoJack Horseman
"They bought my TV pitch."
BoJack Horseman
"What? That's amazing."
BoJack Horseman
"- What's the show? - It's called Horsin' Around."
BoJack Horseman
"Well, good luck on your rocket ship"
BoJack Horseman
"to the top without me."
BoJack Horseman
"and I told those suits if they want my show,"
BoJack Horseman
"then that horse is gonna be BJ Goddamn Horseman."
BoJack Horseman
"And they said, "Okay.""
BoJack Horseman
"Jesus Christ, thank you."
BoJack Horseman
"I think you got the wrong idea here."
BoJack Horseman
"- I caught up in the moment. - Yeah, no, I gotcha."
BoJack Horseman
"We're gonna make an actual TV show!"
BoJack Horseman
"Just kidding. Let's get rich!"
BoJack Horseman
"in that sweater" in this scene"
BoJack Horseman
"I'm wearing the sweater?"
BoJack Horseman
"Did my character suddenly forget"
BoJack Horseman
"that he didn't want to wear the sweater?"
BoJack Horseman
"No, see, that's actually the joke."
BoJack Horseman
"Don't explain the joke to me."
BoJack Horseman
"So you do want me to explain it to you?"
BoJack Horseman
"I want you to add a scene showing"
BoJack Horseman
"Way to go, Shakespeare."
BoJack Horseman
"BJ, you're doing the scene as written."
BoJack Horseman
"What happened to the stories I requested?"
BoJack Horseman
"Where's my rap? You said you'd write me a rap."
BoJack Horseman
"We're working on it."
BoJack Horseman
"Well, what about giving me Rollerblades?"
BoJack Horseman
"if he doesn't roll the blade?"
BoJack Horseman
"Just get out there and do your job."
BoJack Horseman
"Every one of your ideas is stupid or racist."
BoJack Horseman
"That was one pitch,"
BoJack Horseman
"and I didn't say they're all thieves."
BoJack Horseman
"a national dialogue, maybe I'll take my ideas home."
BoJack Horseman
"BoJack, hon."
BoJack Horseman
"That audience out there traveled from all over"
BoJack Horseman
"Okay, Sharona."
BoJack Horseman
"until it gets hard,"
BoJack Horseman
"And there better be some Zimas"
BoJack Horseman
"in my dressing room after the show."
BoJack Horseman
"You guys sound like you're ready for a show."
BoJack Horseman
"Oh, gross. Why do I keep trying to like Zima?"
BoJack Horseman
"- Talk to me, world. - BoJack, it's Princess Carolyn."
BoJack Horseman
"How are you doing today?"
BoJack Horseman
"Well, I'll tell you my problem."
BoJack Horseman
"I just keep getting handsomer."
BoJack Horseman
"Good problems to have."
BoJack Horseman
"Hold for a sec."
BoJack Horseman
"I've got your agent on the line."
BoJack Horseman
"Put it here. Put it here."
BoJack Horseman
"to play your whole life,"
BoJack Horseman
"besides Kathy Ireland's bathing suit?"
BoJack Horseman
"Good God, when I die, bury me in Kathy Ireland."
BoJack Horseman
"Uh, Marv? Marv?"
BoJack Horseman
"What's the big news?"
BoJack Horseman
"Secretariat!"
BoJack Horseman
"It's happening, and it's down"
BoJack Horseman
"to you and Val Kilmer for the title role."
BoJack Horseman
"That's amazing."
BoJack Horseman
"Thank you. Thank you."
BoJack Horseman
"Now, listen."
BoJack Horseman
"Scandal breaking today"
BoJack Horseman
"surrounding the family sitcom, Horsin' Around."
BoJack Horseman
"Oh, God. What did I do this time?"
BoJack Horseman
"Herb Kazzaz, the show's creator,"
BoJack Horseman
"Conservative groups have been quick to organize."
BoJack Horseman
"Horsin' Around is a show for kids."
BoJack Horseman
"without men like perv Kazzaz flaunting"
BoJack Horseman
"- I'm gay. - No doy."
BoJack Horseman
"But you know me, right?"
BoJack Horseman
"You know that I'm a good guy."
BoJack Horseman
"I need to know that you've got my back."
BoJack Horseman
"If you threaten to walk, they'll listen to you."
BoJack Horseman
"Hey, you know I wouldn't ask if I didn't need it."
BoJack Horseman
"How'd we get so far apart, huh?"
BoJack Horseman
"You know what? You can count on me, Herb."
BoJack Horseman
"I knew it! I knew you'd come through."
BoJack Horseman
"to drive back up to Griffith Park."
BoJack Horseman
"I still owe you that high five, right?"
BoJack Horseman
"but do you guys ever, like, all link up together"
BoJack Horseman
"and do, like, a party train or a fun circle?"
BoJack Horseman
"Feel stupid for asking that."
BoJack Horseman
"And then it goes, "I like healthy gums"
BoJack Horseman
"in a major way.""
BoJack Horseman
"That's great."
BoJack Horseman
"We just gotta make sure that we work in the phrase"
BoJack Horseman
"I'm not gonna waste your time with small talk"
BoJack Horseman
"because you work for me, and your time is my time."
BoJack Horseman
"We're letting Herb go."
BoJack Horseman
"- You can't do that. - "I can't do that.""
BoJack Horseman
"I'm not asking you. It's nothing personal."
BoJack Horseman
"I like Herb. I think he's a good guy."
BoJack Horseman
"But this is a business, and every day"
BoJack Horseman
"we don't fire him, we're flushing money"
BoJack Horseman
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