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Clips from BoJack Horseman - The Telescope (S01E01)

"Hey, Herb,"
BoJack Horseman
"BoJack has one, too."
BoJack Horseman
"I have used mine a grand total of zero times."
BoJack Horseman
"I got it a month before I was diagnosed with cancer."
BoJack Horseman
"I don't even have cancer, and I don't use it."
BoJack Horseman
"Can't this thing go any faster?"
BoJack Horseman
"I'm sensing a lot of hostility here."
BoJack Horseman
"You want me to take my mask off? Fine."
BoJack Horseman
"Oh."
BoJack Horseman
"Oh, my God, Herb, you met President Clinton?"
BoJack Horseman
"I mean, I did do that, but I also started..."
BoJack Horseman
"I presented at the Teen Choice Awards."
BoJack Horseman
"Wait, is that Charlotte?"
BoJack Horseman
"Er?"
BoJack Horseman
"and I hope I actually wake up later."
BoJack Horseman
""Juice controls the media.""
BoJack Horseman
"I love it."
BoJack Horseman
"I'm running away from the cops,"
BoJack Horseman
"I'm running away from myself."
BoJack Horseman
"- Truth. Truth. - Whoa."
BoJack Horseman
"and I'd never forget this one afternoon."
BoJack Horseman
"But thanks to you guys, I think I'm finally"
BoJack Horseman
"I should have brought a bottle of wine."
BoJack Horseman
"I just would have drunk it on the way here."
BoJack Horseman
"This isn't about wine, BoJack."
BoJack Horseman
"about Herb but we're actually talking about something else?"
BoJack Horseman
"You come back for that Vitamix, you..."
BoJack Horseman
"Yeah. I've been meaning to see a doctor."
BoJack Horseman
"- feel better if we just... - I'm dying."
BoJack Horseman
"20 years... You didn't call me."
BoJack Horseman
"I knew all those showbiz phonies would turn on me."
BoJack Horseman
"Now, get the fuck out of my house."
BoJack Horseman
"- Put that back, asshole! - No, you gave this to me."
BoJack Horseman
"No!"
BoJack Horseman
"BoJack?"
BoJack Horseman
"What are you doing? Get off him."
BoJack Horseman
"about who he hurts."
BoJack Horseman
"I gotta go."
BoJack Horseman
"Well, for what it's worth,"
BoJack Horseman
"♪ I was in a very famous TV show ♪"
BoJack Horseman
"♪ And make you understand ♪"
BoJack Horseman
"Oh, right."
BoJack Horseman
"Well, just tell whoever, then."
BoJack Horseman
"Asshole!"
BoJack Horseman
"He has cancer, which, as you know, is a whole thing."
BoJack Horseman
"Plus, he hates me, so I could really use"
BoJack Horseman
"some good news at the end of the day."
BoJack Horseman
"Oh, my God. You're going to see Herb?"
BoJack Horseman
"You must be really... Nope."
BoJack Horseman
"- Ready for this? - Listen."
BoJack Horseman
"I want to make sure I don't spend"
BoJack Horseman
"any time alone with Herb."
BoJack Horseman
"And your memoirist."
BoJack Horseman
"before he dies of cancer."
BoJack Horseman
"No bathroom breaks."
BoJack Horseman
"to text your fiancé a bunch of winky smileys"
BoJack Horseman
"Congratulations on the whole being engaged thing,"
BoJack Horseman
"Thank God I don't have to die alone."
BoJack Horseman
"- No offense. - None taken."
BoJack Horseman
"Till you said, "No offense.""
BoJack Horseman
"So what's the deal with you and this guy?"
BoJack Horseman
"You never talk about him."
BoJack Horseman
"Well, I kind of, maybe stabbed him in the back."
BoJack Horseman
"- Movie's over. - Watch the next one."
BoJack Horseman
"Aw, I'm tired of watching movies."
BoJack Horseman
"I spy with my little eye someone who needs"
BoJack Horseman
"a story about you being a shitty friend,"
BoJack Horseman
"but then, we got interrupted by you yelling at Todd."
BoJack Horseman
"♪ Beep, bop, beep, bop, beep, bop ♪"
BoJack Horseman
"and a bathtub and... Wait, hold on..."
BoJack Horseman
"A whole 'nother room with another sink?"
BoJack Horseman
"Here. I got you a beer. It's on the house."
BoJack Horseman
"Don't tell my boss."
BoJack Horseman
"Thanks, Charlotte, but one beer gets me tipsy."
BoJack Horseman
"I got to be clear-headed for my set."
BoJack Horseman
"Yeah, and the suits from ABC are here."
BoJack Horseman
"Look. They're nodding."
BoJack Horseman
"Wow. They must be serious about Herb."
BoJack Horseman
"That's Angela Diaz."
BoJack Horseman
"She's the woman who made pantsuits a thing."
BoJack Horseman
"Oh, before I forget."
BoJack Horseman
"Herb and I are gonna see"
BoJack Horseman
"Back to the Future again this weekend."
BoJack Horseman
"That movie was amazing,"
BoJack Horseman
"except for all the lame time period jokes."
BoJack Horseman
"I'll have a New Coke, please."
BoJack Horseman
"Sometimes, it makes me feel like a third wheel."
BoJack Horseman
"BoJack, stop."
BoJack Horseman
"Without the third wheel,"
BoJack Horseman
"how would you ride a tricycle?"
BoJack Horseman
"Herb Kazzaz, ladies and gentlemen."
BoJack Horseman
"I've thought before but never had the balls to say."
BoJack Horseman
"Thanks, BJ. I set 'em up."
BoJack Horseman
"Now, you knock 'em down."
BoJack Horseman
"Let's give it up for BoJack Horseman."
BoJack Horseman
"Well, thank you, Bubbles."
BoJack Horseman
"Excuse me, miss. Is that your date?"
BoJack Horseman
"Maker's Manhattan? 2:00 P.M.?"
BoJack Horseman
"I got another audition this afternoon."
BoJack Horseman
"God, I can't wait till I'm finally up"
BoJack Horseman
"for real jobs instead of these dumb commercials."
BoJack Horseman
"Ugh. I hate when people say that."
BoJack Horseman
"Just say the thing."
BoJack Horseman
"You don't need to introduce the concept"
BoJack Horseman
"that there's going to be a thing."
BoJack Horseman
"I don't expect to be offered Secretariat"
BoJack Horseman
"We'll get there, BJ. We both will."
BoJack Horseman
"In fact, if I play my cards right,"
BoJack Horseman
"I might get there real soon."
BoJack Horseman
"Wait."
BoJack Horseman
"- Did the guys from ABC call? - Uh-huh."
BoJack Horseman
"at LACMA this weekend."
BoJack Horseman
"I'm gonna pitch 'em a TV show while they're drunk."
BoJack Horseman
"That's the perfect time to pitch a TV show."
BoJack Horseman
"You're brilliant."
BoJack Horseman
"That's Joyce DeWitt, isn't it?"
BoJack Horseman
"That's Joyce DeWitt. And that's Angela Diaz."
BoJack Horseman
"And that's Ubu, the guy who sits."
BoJack Horseman
"Guys, don't take your eyes off the prize."
BoJack Horseman
"We need to fill Charlotte's bag with these mini quiches."
BoJack Horseman
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