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Clips from Resident Alien - The Alien Within (S02E02)

"- I mean, I think the resort is great for the town."
Resident Alien
"You know, it's something that everyone can be proud of."
Resident Alien
"- Then you're doing the right thing."
Resident Alien
"- Yeah."
Resident Alien
"- Yeah."
Resident Alien
"- Thanks, hon. I like this."
Resident Alien
"You know, we--we're a team."
Resident Alien
"- Hell yeah, we are."
Resident Alien
"- Nothing can stop us."
Resident Alien
"[quirky music]"
Resident Alien
"* *"
Resident Alien
"- Finally I am in my natural alien skin."
Resident Alien
"If living in that human meat case"
Resident Alien
"was speeding up my humanity,"
Resident Alien
"I will spend the rest of my time"
Resident Alien
"on Earth as an alien in this Earth home."
Resident Alien
"Oh, son of a bitch!"
Resident Alien
"[Neil Diamond's "Cracklin' Rose"]"
Resident Alien
"* *"
Resident Alien
"God damn it."
Resident Alien
"Son of a bitch!"
Resident Alien
"- * We gonna ride till there ain't no more to go *"
Resident Alien
"- Ow!"
Resident Alien
"- * Taking it slow *"
Resident Alien
"* And Lord don't you know? *"
Resident Alien
"- Son of a bitch!"
Resident Alien
"- * No need to say please *"
Resident Alien
"* To no man for a happy tune *"
Resident Alien
"- [sighs]"
Resident Alien
"- * Oh I love my Rosie child *"
Resident Alien
"[urine trickling]"
Resident Alien
"- Ahh."
Resident Alien
"It is not practical to live in this alien body on Earth."
Resident Alien
"- * You and me we go in style *"
Resident Alien
"* Cracklin' Rose *"
Resident Alien
"- I can return to human form as long"
Resident Alien
"as I start acting like an alien."
Resident Alien
"[loud thud]"
Resident Alien
"Mother of a whore!"
Resident Alien
"The baby will only listen to that little girl?"
Resident Alien
"[loud clang]"
Resident Alien
"Then I will do the right thing."
Resident Alien
"I will kidnap a child."
Resident Alien
"[loud crash]"
Resident Alien
"[light music]"
Resident Alien
"- Hey."
Resident Alien
"- That lunch lady's not here. The coast is clear."
Resident Alien
"- How come you're not wearing a costume?"
Resident Alien
"- We don't celebrate Halloween."
Resident Alien
"There's no spiritual meaning behind it."
Resident Alien
"It's just a bunch of kids walking around"
Resident Alien
"perpetuating the message of witches, evil spirits,"
Resident Alien
"and satanic worship."
Resident Alien
"- Yeah, but also there's candy."
Resident Alien
"- I don't need to stuff my face with sugar."
Resident Alien
"- Then why are you eating honey?"
Resident Alien
"- To soothe my throat."
Resident Alien
"I have to find the baby."
Resident Alien
"I was up all night practicing alien calling sounds."
Resident Alien
"Obviously, going to the RV and yelling out,"
Resident Alien
""Baby, baby, over here! Baby?""
Resident Alien
"Isn't gonna be enough."
Resident Alien
"- Yeah, I've been practicing my Frankenstein sounds."
Resident Alien
"Rah!"
Resident Alien
"- Well, I guess that is it for me."
Resident Alien
"- We are both very sad to see you go."
Resident Alien
"Aren't you sad, Sheriff?"
Resident Alien
"- Yeah, well, it was nice working with you, Detective."
Resident Alien
"But you're leaving 'cause we solved the murder,"
Resident Alien
"and that actually makes me extremely happy."
Resident Alien
"- And he's also sad."
Resident Alien
"- I got you something."
Resident Alien
"Courtesy of the Jessup Police Department."
Resident Alien
"Crime was down 20% last year, so we had a surplus."
Resident Alien
"- Thanks."
Resident Alien
"Should probably put this crime tape around the sheriff,"
Resident Alien
"because he should be arrested for being too handsome, right?"
Resident Alien
"- Well, I mean, he wouldn't serve much time."
Resident Alien
"It's involuntary handsomeness."
Resident Alien
"[laughter]"
Resident Alien
"He can't help it."
Resident Alien
"[quirky music]"
Resident Alien
"* *"
Resident Alien
"This was--this was fun."
Resident Alien
"not the murder ring,"
Resident Alien
"but, you know, the-- the other stuff."
Resident Alien
"- Yeah, okay, then, well, I got to get back to my desk,"
Resident Alien
"a lot of stuff to do."
Resident Alien
"Deputy, let's go over those new case files."
Resident Alien
"- Oh, what case files?"
Resident Alien
"- You know, for the-- the big new case."
Resident Alien
"- Well, this was the big case."
Resident Alien
"- From the other-- the other big case."
Resident Alien
"- The bakery double charging you for the apple fritter?"
Resident Alien
"- Yes, that is the case."
Resident Alien
"I got to find the receipt for that, 'cause I want justice."
Resident Alien
"All right. Thank you. [clears throat]"
Resident Alien
"- You're welcome."
Resident Alien
"Well, that's my cue to go, so..."
Resident Alien
"- Yup. Bye. - Okay, bye."
Resident Alien
"- What was that?"
Resident Alien
"Why didn't you ask her out?"
Resident Alien
"She was waiting for it."
Resident Alien
"- Okay, look, I like Detective Torres, okay?"
Resident Alien
"She's a pain in the ass, but I like it, all right?"
Resident Alien
"She's smart. She's strong."
Resident Alien
"She's very attractive."
Resident Alien
"Just not aiming to plant my roots"
Resident Alien
"any deeper here in Patience."
Resident Alien
"- Why not?"
Resident Alien
"- Well, I've been thinking a lot lately,"
Resident Alien
"and it might be time to move back to DC."
Resident Alien
"- What?"
Resident Alien
"- Oh, come on, Deputy, you know me."
Resident Alien
"I need the excitement of a big case, you know."
Resident Alien
"And the biggest case I ever had here, it just ended."
Resident Alien
"Hell, DC's got murders as far as the eye can see."
Resident Alien
"It's like a whole forest of them in constant bloom."
Resident Alien
"It's beautiful."
Resident Alien
"It is."
Resident Alien
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