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Clips from Hamlet 2

"To act is to live."
Hamlet 2
"Are you tired? Overweight?"
Hamlet 2
"Lacking energy?"
Hamlet 2
"Do you wish you could look and feel young again? You can!"
Hamlet 2
"By unlocking the power of natural juice"
Hamlet 2
"with Jack La Lanne's Power Juicer."
Hamlet 2
"We juiced with this other juicer,"
Hamlet 2
"and look how much work it takes,"
Hamlet 2
"feeding the small chute."
Hamlet 2
"To act is to breathe the poet's breath."
Hamlet 2
"It is to embody the dreams of man."
Hamlet 2
"To live as an actor is to live a dream."
Hamlet 2
"I'm having a herpes outbreak right now."
Hamlet 2
"But you'd never know it."
Hamlet 2
"Thanks, Herpecol."
Hamlet 2
"But dreams are ephemeral, and sometimes impossible."
Hamlet 2
"So we must ask,"
Hamlet 2
"where do dreams go to die?"
Hamlet 2
"Hey, look, I'm sorry, okay?"
Hamlet 2
"Hey, well, why don't I take you out to dinner to apologize for my rudeness?"
Hamlet 2
"Give me your number."
Hamlet 2
"You want my number?"
Hamlet 2
"Which number do you want, George?"
Hamlet 2
"You see, right there. I like the way you say "George.""
Hamlet 2
"For instance, ten. That's how many months old my baby girl is."
Hamlet 2
"You got a baby girl?"
Hamlet 2
"Sexy, huh?"
Hamlet 2
"How about six?"
Hamlet 2
"That's how old my other daughter is."
Hamlet 2
"Eight is the age of my son."
Hamlet 2
"Two is how many times I've been married and divorced."
Hamlet 2
"Sixteen is the number of dollars in my bank account."
Hamlet 2
"And I'm guessing zero is the number"
Hamlet 2
"of times you're gonna call me."
Hamlet 2
"Hey, the reviews are in."
Hamlet 2
"Read them quickly. It minimizes the pain."
Hamlet 2
""Are Dana Marschz's bi-yearly stagings of"
Hamlet 2
""popular Hollywood films an ironic gesture,"
Hamlet 2
""or is he just profoundly confused?"
Hamlet 2
""To be fair,"
Hamlet 2
""this year's Erin Brockovich accomplishes something quite astonishing.""
Hamlet 2
""It manages to make last year's production"
Hamlet 2
""of Mississippi Burning look sparkling by comparison.""
Hamlet 2
"What about the acting?"
Hamlet 2
""It is perhaps best not to mention the acting."
Hamlet 2
""In the theater, actors endeavor to simulate human emotion."
Hamlet 2
""Rand Posin and Epiphany Sellars flap their lips"
Hamlet 2
""and wave their arms like malfunctioning wind-up toys...""
Hamlet 2
"That's enough!"
Hamlet 2
"Every trimester we get fisted by this guy!"
Hamlet 2
"What's "fisted"?"
Hamlet 2
"What?"
Hamlet 2
"I have so much anger."
Hamlet 2
"I feel like I've been raped."
Hamlet 2
"In the face!"
Hamlet 2
"What do I need to do to please you?"
Hamlet 2
"Is that the purpose of your plays?"
Hamlet 2
"To please me?"
Hamlet 2
"I put a lot of myself into my work."
Hamlet 2
"Would it kill you to say something nice about it once in a while?"
Hamlet 2
"Have you ever considered doing a play"
Hamlet 2
"that wasn't originally a popular movie?"
Hamlet 2
"No. Why?"
Hamlet 2
"Do you think I should be writing more of my own material?"
Hamlet 2
"That wasn't what I had in mind, but, sure, why not?"
Hamlet 2
"You know, there's so much I want to say through my work"
Hamlet 2
"that sometimes it overwhelms me."
Hamlet 2
"I gotta go clean the hamster cages."
Hamlet 2
"Are you going to be all right?"
Hamlet 2
"Yes, I'm great."
Hamlet 2
"Okay."
Hamlet 2
"Yeah, you take care."
Hamlet 2
"Thanks for the truth sandwich, my little brother."
Hamlet 2
"Morning, Gary."
Hamlet 2
"Morning, Dana."
Hamlet 2
"Top of the morning to you."
Hamlet 2
"It's a really kickass sunny day outside today, man."
Hamlet 2
"Great observation there, Gary."
Hamlet 2
"We live in Tucson."
Hamlet 2
"Can I talk to you, please, privately?"
Hamlet 2
"Sure, squishy."
Hamlet 2
"Excuse us."
Hamlet 2
"Oh, yeah."
Hamlet 2
"Sorry, I'm a little groggy. I was up late."
Hamlet 2
"I'm working on an original play."
Hamlet 2
"It's about my childhood."
Hamlet 2
"Anyway, I know we're broke and that we needed a roommate,"
Hamlet 2
"but I swear to God, I can't live like this anymore."
Hamlet 2
"I'm gonna go back to dealing pot, I swear..."
Hamlet 2
"No, no, I will not have you pushing drugs."
Hamlet 2
"I was a dealer, not a pusher."
Hamlet 2
"It's just until I, you know, get an agent"
Hamlet 2
"and start doing commercials again."
Hamlet 2
"Also known as never."
Hamlet 2
"You keep me honest, I adore you for that."
Hamlet 2
"Well..."
Hamlet 2
"It's not so bad. I mean, Gary has a car."
Hamlet 2
"That's helped out a lot around here."
Hamlet 2
"Gary has a car."
Hamlet 2
"Maybe I can get him to run me over with it."
Hamlet 2
"Oh, you."
Hamlet 2
"What did I do so right to get you in my life?"
Hamlet 2
"Hey, Max. Hey."
Hamlet 2
"Okay, I... Okay, I get it."
Hamlet 2
"Hey, gang, what's up?"
Hamlet 2
"Mr. Marschz, have you seen our new class yet?"
Hamlet 2
"No. Why?"
Hamlet 2
"Let's just say, it's new and different."
Hamlet 2
"Well, Rand, "new" and "different" are two of my favorite words."
Hamlet 2
"In my prayer circle, I've been praying"
Hamlet 2
"for more racial understanding,"
Hamlet 2
"but I still get anxious around ethnics."
Hamlet 2
"Okay, please turn down the music."
Hamlet 2
"Not off, just down."
Hamlet 2
"Okay, we've got ourselves a full house!"
Hamlet 2
"Scary!"
Hamlet 2
"Normally, I only have the two students."
Hamlet 2
"Let's go around and find out why drama is suddenly so popular."
Hamlet 2
"You?"
Hamlet 2
"Yolanda doesn't talk."
Hamlet 2
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