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Clips from Cheers - Whodunit? (S03E03)

I JUST HAVE TO FIND A WAY TO TELL HIM IN A SUBTLE AND TACTFUL WAY

"I JUST HAVE TO FIND A WAY TO TELL HIM IN A SUBTLE AND TACTFUL WAY"

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THAT WILL ALLOW HIM TO PRESERVE HIS DIGNITY.

"THAT WILL ALLOW HIM TO PRESERVE HIS DIGNITY."

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HEY, PIGPEN! WHAT'S THAT THING?

"HEY, PIGPEN! WHAT'S THAT THING?"

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WHAT, ARE YOU TRYING TO CATCH PIGEONS?

"WHAT, ARE YOU TRYING TO CATCH PIGEONS?"

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OOH!

"OOH!"

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THANK YOU VERY MUCH.

"THANK YOU VERY MUCH."

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DON'T MENTION IT. I LIKE A MAN WHO WEARS HIS DINNER WITH PRIDE.

"DON'T MENTION IT. I LIKE A MAN WHO WEARS HIS DINNER WITH PRIDE."

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HERE WE ARE.

"HERE WE ARE."

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SIR, IN SPITE OF THE FACT

"SIR, IN SPITE OF THE FACT"

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THAT IT MAY CAUSE YOU SOME PERSONAL EMBARRASSMENT,

"THAT IT MAY CAUSE YOU SOME PERSONAL EMBARRASSMENT,"

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I HAVE TO TELL YOU YOU HAVE A SPOT--

"I HAVE TO TELL YOU YOU HAVE A SPOT--"

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IN MY HEART.

"IN MY HEART."

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ALWAYS HAVE, ALWAYS WILL.

"ALWAYS HAVE, ALWAYS WILL."

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THANK YOU. THANK YOU VERY MUCH, FRASIER.

"THANK YOU. THANK YOU VERY MUCH, FRASIER."

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YOU'LL EXCUSE ME. I'VE GOT A TELEPHONE CALL TO MAKE.

"YOU'LL EXCUSE ME. I'VE GOT A TELEPHONE CALL TO MAKE."

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BELIEVE ME, I AM NOT THE SORT OF MAN

"BELIEVE ME, I AM NOT THE SORT OF MAN"

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WHO APPROACHES YOUNG, UNFAMILIAR LADIES IN A BAR

"WHO APPROACHES YOUNG, UNFAMILIAR LADIES IN A BAR"

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AND TRIES TO BECOME MORE FAMILIAR BY THE USE OF SOME SMOOTH LINE.

"AND TRIES TO BECOME MORE FAMILIAR BY THE USE OF SOME SMOOTH LINE."

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YOUR SECRET IS SAFE WITH ME.

"YOUR SECRET IS SAFE WITH ME."

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PARDON ME. PARDON ME FOR SAYING THIS,

"PARDON ME. PARDON ME FOR SAYING THIS,"

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BUT THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT YOU THAT IS SO... STRIKINGLY ATTRACTIVE.

"BUT THERE'S SOMETHING ABOUT YOU THAT IS SO... STRIKINGLY ATTRACTIVE."

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WHILE YOU'RE STARING AT MY ZOOMERS,

"WHILE YOU'RE STARING AT MY ZOOMERS,"

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LET'S SEE IF WE CAN FIGURE OUT WHAT THAT IS.

"LET'S SEE IF WE CAN FIGURE OUT WHAT THAT IS."

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UH, WHAT WOULD IT TAKE TO GET YOUR TELEPHONE NUMBER?

"UH, WHAT WOULD IT TAKE TO GET YOUR TELEPHONE NUMBER?"

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A PHONE BOOK.

"A PHONE BOOK."

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WOULD YOU TELL ME YOUR NAME,

"WOULD YOU TELL ME YOUR NAME,"

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OR SHALL I JUST CHECK IN THE YELLOW PAGES UNDER "HOT BABE"?

"OR SHALL I JUST CHECK IN THE YELLOW PAGES UNDER "HOT BABE"?"

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THE NAME IS CARLA TORTELLI,

"THE NAME IS CARLA TORTELLI,"

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AND, UH... I'M STARTING TO LIKE YOU.

"AND, UH... I'M STARTING TO LIKE YOU."

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SAY, NORM?

"SAY, NORM?"

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UH, YEAH, CLIFF?

"UH, YEAH, CLIFF?"

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YOU SEEM TO HAVE A SPOT THERE ON YOUR TIE.

"YOU SEEM TO HAVE A SPOT THERE ON YOUR TIE."

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OH, SO I DO, SO I DO.

"OH, SO I DO, SO I DO."

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THANK YOU, CLIFFIE, FOR POINTING THAT OUT.

"THANK YOU, CLIFFIE, FOR POINTING THAT OUT."

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IF MORE PEOPLE WERE AS CONSCIENTIOUS AS YOU ARE,

"IF MORE PEOPLE WERE AS CONSCIENTIOUS AS YOU ARE,"

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I THINK WE COULD WIPE OUT

"I THINK WE COULD WIPE OUT"

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SOCIAL EMBARRASSMENT IN OUR TIME.

"SOCIAL EMBARRASSMENT IN OUR TIME."

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WELL... DON'T THANK ME, NORM.

"WELL... DON'T THANK ME, NORM."

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PERIODIC TIE CHECKS ARE THE DUTY

"PERIODIC TIE CHECKS ARE THE DUTY"

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OF EVERY AMERICAN CITIZEN.

"OF EVERY AMERICAN CITIZEN."

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DID HE LOOK AT HIS TIE?

"DID HE LOOK AT HIS TIE?"

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NO.

"NO."

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SO MUCH FOR SUBTLETY.

"SO MUCH FOR SUBTLETY."

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ALL RIGHT. YOU JUST START A FIRE FOR DIVERSION,

"ALL RIGHT. YOU JUST START A FIRE FOR DIVERSION,"

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AND I'LL HOSE HIM DOWN.

"AND I'LL HOSE HIM DOWN."

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BOY, AM I EXHAUSTED!

"BOY, AM I EXHAUSTED!"

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NOT MUCH SLEEP, HUH?

"NOT MUCH SLEEP, HUH?"

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NO, NORMY. I SLEPT LIKE A BABY.

"NO, NORMY. I SLEPT LIKE A BABY."

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IT'S JUST THAT I DREAMED I HAD INSOMNIA ALL NIGHT.

"IT'S JUST THAT I DREAMED I HAD INSOMNIA ALL NIGHT."

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YOU KNOW, SOMEDAY, THAT MAN'S HEAD IS GOING TO OPEN UP,

"YOU KNOW, SOMEDAY, THAT MAN'S HEAD IS GOING TO OPEN UP,"

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AND A PRIZE WILL POP OUT.

"AND A PRIZE WILL POP OUT."

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HI, EVERYBODY!

"HI, EVERYBODY!"

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OH, HEY, CARLA,

"OH, HEY, CARLA,"

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I GOT SOME FLOWERS HERE FOR YOU.

"I GOT SOME FLOWERS HERE FOR YOU."

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OOH, FOR ME?

"OOH, FOR ME?"

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YEAH. VERY CUTE, CARLA.

"YEAH. VERY CUTE, CARLA."

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YOU'VE GOTTEN FLOWERS EVERY DAY FOR THE LAST TWO WEEKS.

"YOU'VE GOTTEN FLOWERS EVERY DAY FOR THE LAST TWO WEEKS."

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AH! MMM!

"AH! MMM!"

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YEAH. I GUESS I OUGHT TO BE FEELING A LITTLE GUILTY.

"YEAH. I GUESS I OUGHT TO BE FEELING A LITTLE GUILTY."

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I MEAN, I'M GETTING ALL THESE FLOWERS,

"I MEAN, I'M GETTING ALL THESE FLOWERS,"

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AND THERE ARE BEES GOING TO BED HUNGRY.

"AND THERE ARE BEES GOING TO BED HUNGRY."

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YEAH.

"YEAH."

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WE'RE KIND OF CURIOUS HERE.

"WE'RE KIND OF CURIOUS HERE."

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WHO'S YOUR SECRET ADMIRER?

"WHO'S YOUR SECRET ADMIRER?"

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NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS.

"NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS."

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THANK YOU, CARLA.

"THANK YOU, CARLA."

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SAM.

"SAM."

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SO WHAT DID SHE SAY?

"SO WHAT DID SHE SAY?"

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"NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS."

""NONE OF YOUR DAMN BUSINESS.""

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WELL, EXCUSE ME FOR LIVING.

"WELL, EXCUSE ME FOR LIVING."

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WHAT IF I SAID THAT TO YOU

"WHAT IF I SAID THAT TO YOU"

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WHEN YOU ASKED ME TO SHOW YOU HOW TO THROW A KNUCKLE BALL?

"WHEN YOU ASKED ME TO SHOW YOU HOW TO THROW A KNUCKLE BALL?"

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YOU DID.

"YOU DID."

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OH, SO WE'RE EVEN.

"OH, SO WE'RE EVEN."

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OH, FRASIER, YOU'RE EARLY.

"OH, FRASIER, YOU'RE EARLY."

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IS SOMETHING WRONG?

"IS SOMETHING WRONG?"

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WELL, OF COURSE SOMETHING'S WRONG.

"WELL, OF COURSE SOMETHING'S WRONG."

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DR. LUDLOW CANCELED OUT ON US AGAIN.

"DR. LUDLOW CANCELED OUT ON US AGAIN."

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SURPRISE, SURPRISE.

"SURPRISE, SURPRISE."

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WHAT EXCUSE DID HE GIVE THIS TIME?

"WHAT EXCUSE DID HE GIVE THIS TIME?"

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SOMETHING CAME UP.

"SOMETHING CAME UP."

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SOMETHING'S BEEN COMING UP EVERY NIGHT

"SOMETHING'S BEEN COMING UP EVERY NIGHT"

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FOR THE LAST TWO MONTHS.

"FOR THE LAST TWO MONTHS."

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WELL, FRASIER...

"WELL, FRASIER..."

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MAYBE WE JUST HAVE TO ADMIT THAT HE DOESN'T WANT TO SEE US SOCIALLY.

"MAYBE WE JUST HAVE TO ADMIT THAT HE DOESN'T WANT TO SEE US SOCIALLY."

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WELL, YES, I GUESS WE'VE BEEN TRYING TOO HARD.

"WELL, YES, I GUESS WE'VE BEEN TRYING TOO HARD."

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WE'VE BEEN TOO EAGER.

"WE'VE BEEN TOO EAGER."

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SAM, CAN I GET A BEER OR SOMETHING, PLEASE?

"SAM, CAN I GET A BEER OR SOMETHING, PLEASE?"

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ESPECIALLY THAT FIRST NIGHT

"ESPECIALLY THAT FIRST NIGHT"

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WHEN WE MADE SUCH BUFFOONS OF OURSELVES.

"WHEN WE MADE SUCH BUFFOONS OF OURSELVES."

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WE, FRASIER?

"WE, FRASIER?"

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ALL RIGHT. YOU.

"ALL RIGHT. YOU."

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ME?

"ME?"

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YES. THE WAY YOU FAWNED OVER HIM WAS NOTHING LESS THAN CRIMINAL.

"YES. THE WAY YOU FAWNED OVER HIM WAS NOTHING LESS THAN CRIMINAL."

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IF YOU HAD TAKEN OFF YOUR CLOTHES

"IF YOU HAD TAKEN OFF YOUR CLOTHES"

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AND WRITHED ON THE FLOOR IN FRONT OF HIM,

"AND WRITHED ON THE FLOOR IN FRONT OF HIM,"

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IT WOULD HAVE BEEN A REFRESHING NOTE OF SUBTLETY.

"IT WOULD HAVE BEEN A REFRESHING NOTE OF SUBTLETY."

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NO WONDER THE MAN'S BEEN SHUNNING US.

"NO WONDER THE MAN'S BEEN SHUNNING US."

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FRASIER, YOU WERE SO OBSEQUIOUS,

"FRASIER, YOU WERE SO OBSEQUIOUS,"

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IF HE HAD ASKED YOU TO CLUCK LIKE A CHICKEN AND LAY AN EGG,

"IF HE HAD ASKED YOU TO CLUCK LIKE A CHICKEN AND LAY AN EGG,"

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YOU WOULD HAVE SQUATTED AND ASKED, "WHAT COLOR?"

"YOU WOULD HAVE SQUATTED AND ASKED, "WHAT COLOR?""

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WELL, HE DIDN'T ASK ME TO,

"WELL, HE DIDN'T ASK ME TO,"

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SO IT'S A MOOT POINT AT BEST, DIANE.

"SO IT'S A MOOT POINT AT BEST, DIANE."

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I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY.

"I'M SORRY. I'M SORRY."

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DIANE, WHILE I'M THINKING ABOUT IT, I NEED TONIGHT OFF.

"DIANE, WHILE I'M THINKING ABOUT IT, I NEED TONIGHT OFF."

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COULD YOU SWITCH WITH ME?

"COULD YOU SWITCH WITH ME?"

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UH, WELL...

"UH, WELL..."

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WHY NOT? THERE'S NOTHING GOING ON IN OUR LIVES.

"WHY NOT? THERE'S NOTHING GOING ON IN OUR LIVES."

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THAT'LL BE FINE, CARLA. YOU'RE IN LUCK AGAIN.

"THAT'LL BE FINE, CARLA. YOU'RE IN LUCK AGAIN."

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I SEEMS EVERY TIME YOU WANT TO TRADE NIGHTS

"I SEEMS EVERY TIME YOU WANT TO TRADE NIGHTS"

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WITH ME, MY PLANS GET CANCELED.

"WITH ME, MY PLANS GET CANCELED."

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YEAH. GO FIGURE.

"YEAH. GO FIGURE."

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HEY, DIANE.

"HEY, DIANE."

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PSST!

"PSST!"

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YOU KNOW, I'VE BEEN THINKING.

"YOU KNOW, I'VE BEEN THINKING."

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HAVE YOU?

"HAVE YOU?"

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THE ODDS MAKERS TAKE A BEATING AGAIN.

"THE ODDS MAKERS TAKE A BEATING AGAIN."

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LISTEN, LISTEN. IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THIS LUDLOW FELLOW

"LISTEN, LISTEN. IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THIS LUDLOW FELLOW"

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HASN'T BEEN SEEING THE TWO OF YOU

"HASN'T BEEN SEEING THE TWO OF YOU"

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BECAUSE HE'S BEEN SPENDING TIME ALL HIS TIME WITH CARLA?

"BECAUSE HE'S BEEN SPENDING TIME ALL HIS TIME WITH CARLA?"

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