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Clips from Bob's Burgers - Human Flesh (S01E01)

"Listen, pep talk."
Bob's Burgers
"Big day today. It's our grand re-re-re-opening."
Bob's Burgers
"It's labor day weekend,"
Bob's Burgers
"And it looks like wonder wharf is getting mobbed. So we have to--"
Bob's Burgers
"Big day for another reason, too!"
Bob's Burgers
"Linda, I'm in the middle of my pep talk."
Bob's Burgers
"Go ahead, sorry. Go ahead, do your pep."
Bob's Burgers
"So we have to sell some burgers."
Bob's Burgers
"[fart noise] every year, this weekend"
Bob's Burgers
"Makes or breaks us. Who's farting?"
Bob's Burgers
"It's gene's sound effects thing."
Bob's Burgers
"I thought that made you sound like a robot."
Bob's Burgers
"It does robot voice, laser sound,"
Bob's Burgers
"And fart noise."
Bob's Burgers
"Oh, god. Listen, your mother and I"
Bob's Burgers
"Have to go downstairs and grind the meat."
Bob's Burgers
"But you kids know where you're supposed to be while we're gone, right?"
Bob's Burgers
"Tina, you're on the grill."
Bob's Burgers
"My crotch is itchy. All: Oh!"
Bob's Burgers
"Ok. Are you telling me as my daughter,"
Bob's Burgers
"Or as my grill cook? Um, as..."
Bob's Burgers
"Because my grill cook would never tell me that."
Bob's Burgers
"Oh. Also, my daughter"
Bob's Burgers
"Should probably not say anything like that to me."
Bob's Burgers
"Tell her. Tell your mom. My crotch is itchy."
Bob's Burgers
"Come here, let me see. Linda. Not now."
Bob's Burgers
"No, let's all see it. No."
Bob's Burgers
"I'm just not sure if I'll be any good on the grill"
Bob's Burgers
"With just one free hand."
Bob's Burgers
"Ok, I'm just going to keep moving here."
Bob's Burgers
"Louise, you're working the counter."
Bob's Burgers
"I put your little step stool back here."
Bob's Burgers
"But do not alter anything on the chalkboard."
Bob's Burgers
"Well, what if I think of something better?"
Bob's Burgers
"Which would be almost impossible not to do."
Bob's Burgers
"You will not think of something better,"
Bob's Burgers
"Because "new bacon-ings" is perfect. It's hilarious."
Bob's Burgers
"Right? You know what, I'm taking the chalk."
Bob's Burgers
"Like I don't have chalk."
Bob's Burgers
"Gene, you're outside, nicely offering people"
Bob's Burgers
"A free sample, all right? I'm on it!"
Bob's Burgers
"But people coming out of the crematorium next door;"
Bob's Burgers
"People obviously in mourning... Yeah?"
Bob's Burgers
"Don't offer them samples."
Bob's Burgers
"Dad, when I'm in character out there,"
Bob's Burgers
"I get in a zone!"
Bob's Burgers
"I can't keep track of who's in mourning and who isn't."
Bob's Burgers
"Just anyone with an urn... Yeah?"
Bob's Burgers
"Leave 'em alone!"
Bob's Burgers
"I know you think it's the gene show out there,"
Bob's Burgers
"But there's a line between entertaining and annoying."
Bob's Burgers
"No! That's a myth."
Bob's Burgers
"[laser sounds]"
Bob's Burgers
"[fart sounds]"
Bob's Burgers
"All right, listen. You're my children and I love you."
Bob's Burgers
"But you're all terrible at what you do here,"
Bob's Burgers
"And I feel like I should tell you,"
Bob's Burgers
"I'd fire all of you if I could. Bob!"
Bob's Burgers
"All right, hands in."
Bob's Burgers
"Don't--tina, don't put your hand in."
Bob's Burgers
"Tina: What... All right. Sell some burgers!"
Bob's Burgers
"All, softly: Sell some burgers."
Bob's Burgers
"[crying]"
Bob's Burgers
"Bob's burgers!"
Bob's Burgers
"[robot voice] free sample! [laser noise]"
Bob's Burgers
"Come and get it. [fart noise]"
Bob's Burgers
"[fart noise] aahh!"
Bob's Burgers
"I don't like leaving the kids alone up there for this long."
Bob's Burgers
"Something bad's gonna happen."
Bob's Burgers
"Bob, they're fine. Please, I asked you a question."
Bob's Burgers
"Yes, what was the question?"
Bob's Burgers
"Do you remember our wedding night?"
Bob's Burgers
"Yes. We worked 'cause we couldn't afford not to. I remember."
Bob's Burgers
"You know you're grinding too fast. Slow down."
Bob's Burgers
"What was the date? The date?"
Bob's Burgers
"Yes, the date of our wedding!"
Bob's Burgers
"I don't know."
Bob's Burgers
"Oh, crap. Is it today? Yes, bob!"
Bob's Burgers
"Today's our anniversary. Yes, it is!"
Bob's Burgers
"I'm sorry. Baby, I'm sorry."
Bob's Burgers
"I'm not good with dates, you know that."
Bob's Burgers
"Today's your birthday? Yes, bob!"
Bob's Burgers
"Today's my birthday? Yes, bob!"
Bob's Burgers
"Your due date was today? Yes, bob!"
Bob's Burgers
"How'd it go?"
Bob's Burgers
"How do you think it-- good. It went very well."
Bob's Burgers
"That's good."
Bob's Burgers
"Boy or girl?"
Bob's Burgers
"Where you going? I'm done!"
Bob's Burgers
"I said I'm sorry."
Bob's Burgers
"Bob, I'm done!"
Bob's Burgers
"Linda, come back. We need to finish grinding the hamburger."
Bob's Burgers
"Man: Oh, my god, gross."
Bob's Burgers
"Thank you."
Bob's Burgers
"[robot voice] free samples."
Bob's Burgers
"Hey, you can't give out those samples."
Bob's Burgers
"You just dropped them on the ground."
Bob's Burgers
"Shh! What are you, the dropping food on the ground police?"
Bob's Burgers
"Yes. Oh. They have that?"
Bob's Burgers
"Yes. I'm the health inspector. The what?"
Bob's Burgers
"[robot voice] health inspector. Off."
Bob's Burgers
"What? Health inspector!"
Bob's Burgers
"The burger joint's natural enemy."
Bob's Burgers
"Hello. Welcome to bob's burgers."
Bob's Burgers
"The burger of the day is the child molester."
Bob's Burgers
"It comes with candy. Get it?"
Bob's Burgers
"Yes. No."
Bob's Burgers
"'cause sometimes they use candy"
Bob's Burgers
"To lure their victims--"
Bob's Burgers
"Yes, we get it. Ohh."
Bob's Burgers
"Is this your parents' place?"
Bob's Burgers
"Yes, they're down in the basement"
Bob's Burgers
"Grinding the meat right now. Uh-huh."
Bob's Burgers
"That's not a euphemism."
Bob's Burgers
"They're really grinding the meat."
Bob's Burgers
"Show us the kitchen, please."
Bob's Burgers
"I'm just saying, it's easy to remember our anniversary."
Bob's Burgers
"It's September third. 9/3."
Bob's Burgers
"9 is divisible by 3."
Bob's Burgers
"What? That's not--"
Bob's Burgers
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