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Clips from Cheers - The Heart Is a Lonely Snipehunter (S03E03)

WELL, THIS HAS BEEN A BAD DAY, BAD WEEK, BAD MONTH.

"WELL, THIS HAS BEEN A BAD DAY, BAD WEEK, BAD MONTH."

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THIS TIME OF YEAR IS MURDER

"THIS TIME OF YEAR IS MURDER"

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ON THE PSYCHIATRIC PROFESSION.

"ON THE PSYCHIATRIC PROFESSION."

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WELL, JUST SIT DOWN AND RELAX.

"WELL, JUST SIT DOWN AND RELAX."

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SCOTCH, SAM.

"SCOTCH, SAM."

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YOU GOT PROBLEMS, THERE, FRASIER?

"YOU GOT PROBLEMS, THERE, FRASIER?"

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IT'S ALL THE NEUROSES I FACE DAY IN AND DAY OUT.

"IT'S ALL THE NEUROSES I FACE DAY IN AND DAY OUT."

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IT CAN'T HELP BUT HAVE A NEGATIVE EFFECT ON ME.

"IT CAN'T HELP BUT HAVE A NEGATIVE EFFECT ON ME."

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WHY DON'T YOU JUST DO WHAT I DID?

"WHY DON'T YOU JUST DO WHAT I DID?"

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THROW HER CLOTHES IN THE HALLWAY AND LOCK THE DOOR.

"THROW HER CLOTHES IN THE HALLWAY AND LOCK THE DOOR."

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SAM, DIANE IS MY SALVATION.

"SAM, DIANE IS MY SALVATION."

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IT'S MY PATIENTS THAT HAVE CAUSED THIS DISTRESS.

"IT'S MY PATIENTS THAT HAVE CAUSED THIS DISTRESS."

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THINK OF IT-- DAY AFTER DAY,

"THINK OF IT-- DAY AFTER DAY,"

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MISERABLE PEOPLE COMING INTO YOUR OFFICE

"MISERABLE PEOPLE COMING INTO YOUR OFFICE"

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AND POURING OUT THEIR LITANY OF DEPRESSION AND ANXIETY.

"AND POURING OUT THEIR LITANY OF DEPRESSION AND ANXIETY."

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THE ONLY WAY MY SITUATION COULD BE ANY WORSE

"THE ONLY WAY MY SITUATION COULD BE ANY WORSE"

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IS IF I ACTUALLY LISTENED TO THEM.

"IS IF I ACTUALLY LISTENED TO THEM."

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EVEN AT A TIME LIKE THIS, HIS HUMOR'S SURVIVED.

"EVEN AT A TIME LIKE THIS, HIS HUMOR'S SURVIVED."

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I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU'RE SAYING, DOC.

"I KNOW EXACTLY WHAT YOU'RE SAYING, DOC."

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AFTER ALL THE YEARS BEHIND THIS BAR,

"AFTER ALL THE YEARS BEHIND THIS BAR,"

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I'VE LEARNED HOW TO MAKE A LOT OF PEOPLE HAPPY.

"I'VE LEARNED HOW TO MAKE A LOT OF PEOPLE HAPPY."

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HOW'S THAT, COACH?

"HOW'S THAT, COACH?"

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WELL, WHATEVER PROBLEM THEY GOT,

"WELL, WHATEVER PROBLEM THEY GOT,"

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I POINT OUT THE BIGGER PROBLEM.

"I POINT OUT THE BIGGER PROBLEM."

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IN YOUR CASE, YOU KNOW, YOU'RE GOING BALD.

"IN YOUR CASE, YOU KNOW, YOU'RE GOING BALD."

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I AM. WELL, NOW I'M DEPRESSED AND LOSING MY HAIR.

"I AM. WELL, NOW I'M DEPRESSED AND LOSING MY HAIR."

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THAT'S NOTHING. IT'S CHILD'S PLAY

"THAT'S NOTHING. IT'S CHILD'S PLAY"

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COMPARED TO THAT BIG MOLE YOU GOT ON YOUR NECK.

"COMPARED TO THAT BIG MOLE YOU GOT ON YOUR NECK."

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PLEASE, COACH, NO MORE. I'M CHEERED UP NOW.

"PLEASE, COACH, NO MORE. I'M CHEERED UP NOW."

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ANYTIME, DOC.

"ANYTIME, DOC."

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ALL RIGHT, SAMMY. JUST ONE QUICK STOP

"ALL RIGHT, SAMMY. JUST ONE QUICK STOP"

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TO CHANGE CLOTHES, AND WE'LL BE ALL SET.

"TO CHANGE CLOTHES, AND WE'LL BE ALL SET."

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OKEY-DOKEY. HOPE THINGS LOOK UP FOR YOU, FRASIER.

"OKEY-DOKEY. HOPE THINGS LOOK UP FOR YOU, FRASIER."

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GOING FISHING, ARE YOU?

"GOING FISHING, ARE YOU?"

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YEAH.

"YEAH."

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WELL, HOW IDYLLIC.

"WELL, HOW IDYLLIC."

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PEACE OF THE WOODS, AWAY FROM THE NOISE,

"PEACE OF THE WOODS, AWAY FROM THE NOISE,"

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THE CRIME, THE BORDERLINE PSYCHOTICS.

"THE CRIME, THE BORDERLINE PSYCHOTICS."

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ACTUALLY, CLIFFIE'S COMING ALONG, TOO.

"ACTUALLY, CLIFFIE'S COMING ALONG, TOO."

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JUST KIDDING. I WAS JUST KIDDING.

"JUST KIDDING. I WAS JUST KIDDING."

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OK, COACH, GOOD NIGHT.

"OK, COACH, GOOD NIGHT."

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SEE YOU, GUYS. BE BACK LATER.

"SEE YOU, GUYS. BE BACK LATER."

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SAM, IT LOOKS LIKE YOU MIGHT HAVE ROOM

"SAM, IT LOOKS LIKE YOU MIGHT HAVE ROOM"

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FOR ONE MORE IN YOUR CAR.

"FOR ONE MORE IN YOUR CAR."

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ISN'T THERE SOMEONE ELSE YOU'D LIKE TO INVITE,

"ISN'T THERE SOMEONE ELSE YOU'D LIKE TO INVITE,"

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A CERTAIN VERY DEPRESSED GENTLEMAN?

"A CERTAIN VERY DEPRESSED GENTLEMAN?"

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BASS ARE ABOUT THIS BIG UP THERE, FRASIER.

"BASS ARE ABOUT THIS BIG UP THERE, FRASIER."

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WANT TO GO GET ONE?

"WANT TO GO GET ONE?"

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I'VE NEVER BEEN FISHING,

"I'VE NEVER BEEN FISHING,"

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BUT YOU KNOW, IT MIGHT BE JUST WHAT I NEED RIGHT NOW.

"BUT YOU KNOW, IT MIGHT BE JUST WHAT I NEED RIGHT NOW."

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IF NONE OF YOU MIND, YOU CAN COUNT ME IN.

"IF NONE OF YOU MIND, YOU CAN COUNT ME IN."

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GOODY.

"GOODY."

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WELL, WATCH OUT, FISH, HERE I COME.

"WELL, WATCH OUT, FISH, HERE I COME."

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YOU WANT TO COME ALONG?

"YOU WANT TO COME ALONG?"

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WE'RE RUNNING A LITTLE LOW ON BAIT.

"WE'RE RUNNING A LITTLE LOW ON BAIT."

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AW, CUT IT OUT, YOU KIDDER.

"AW, CUT IT OUT, YOU KIDDER."

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NOW, SAM, TAKE CARE OF MY FELLA.

"NOW, SAM, TAKE CARE OF MY FELLA."

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HE'S A TENDERFOOT.

"HE'S A TENDERFOOT."

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HOW COME YOU'RE NOT GOING ON THAT FISHING TRIP, COACH?

"HOW COME YOU'RE NOT GOING ON THAT FISHING TRIP, COACH?"

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I DON'T LIKE THE SMELL OF THEM.

"I DON'T LIKE THE SMELL OF THEM."

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YEAH. FISH STINK.

"YEAH. FISH STINK."

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NO. THE GUYS.

"NO. THE GUYS."

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OUT IN THAT SUN ALL DAY, STUCK IN THE MUCK--

"OUT IN THAT SUN ALL DAY, STUCK IN THE MUCK--"

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WHO NEEDS IT?

"WHO NEEDS IT?"

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HEY, COACH, WANT TO PLAY RED SOX TRIVIA?

"HEY, COACH, WANT TO PLAY RED SOX TRIVIA?"

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YEAH, SURE. FIRE AWAY.

"YEAH, SURE. FIRE AWAY."

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GOOD. I GOT SOME REAL TOUGH ONES FOR YOU THIS TIME.

"GOOD. I GOT SOME REAL TOUGH ONES FOR YOU THIS TIME."

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READY?

"READY?"

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NUMBER ONE.

"NUMBER ONE."

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WHAT OVER .300 HITTER WAS CALLED--

"WHAT OVER .300 HITTER WAS CALLED--"

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JIMMY FOXX.

"JIMMY FOXX."

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RIGHT. THAT WAS JUST AN EASY WARMUP.

"RIGHT. THAT WAS JUST AN EASY WARMUP."

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NOW WE'RE GOING TO START, OK?

"NOW WE'RE GOING TO START, OK?"

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SHOOT.

"SHOOT."

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WHAT RED SOX SHORTSTOP SUCCEEDED--

"WHAT RED SOX SHORTSTOP SUCCEEDED--"

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DON BUDDIN.

"DON BUDDIN."

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I'M THINKING OF AN OUTFIELDER--

"I'M THINKING OF AN OUTFIELDER--"

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CONIGLIARO.

"CONIGLIARO."

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BOY, YOU ARE GOOD!

"BOY, YOU ARE GOOD!"

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TRY ME NOW.

"TRY ME NOW."

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UH...WHO WAS THE ONLY MAN TO PINCH-HIT--

"UH...WHO WAS THE ONLY MAN TO PINCH-HIT--"

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LOU CLINTON.

"LOU CLINTON."

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ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO GO ON?

"ARE YOU SURE YOU WANT TO GO ON?"

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EH, I DON'T KNOW.

"EH, I DON'T KNOW."

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IT'S JUST NOT AS MUCH FUN AS IT USED TO BE.

"IT'S JUST NOT AS MUCH FUN AS IT USED TO BE."

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THINK WE'VE BEEN PLAYING TOGETHER TOO LONG?

"THINK WE'VE BEEN PLAYING TOGETHER TOO LONG?"

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WAS THE ANSWER TO YOUR NEXT QUESTION GOING TO BE FRANK MALZONE?

"WAS THE ANSWER TO YOUR NEXT QUESTION GOING TO BE FRANK MALZONE?"

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YEAH.

"YEAH."

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YEAH.

"YEAH."

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[WHOOPING AND LAUGHING]

"[WHOOPING AND LAUGHING]"

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AH! LOOKS LIKE YOU HAD A GOOD TIME.

"AH! LOOKS LIKE YOU HAD A GOOD TIME."

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GREAT TIME, DIANE, GREAT TIME!

"GREAT TIME, DIANE, GREAT TIME!"

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I'M SO GLAD.

"I'M SO GLAD."

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WHERE'S FRASIER?

"WHERE'S FRASIER?"

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HA HA HA! HA HA HA! HA HA HA!

"HA HA HA! HA HA HA! HA HA HA!"

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DID I SAY SOMETHING AMUSING?

"DID I SAY SOMETHING AMUSING?"

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YOU'RE GOING TO GET A GIGGLE OUT OF THIS, DIANE.

"YOU'RE GOING TO GET A GIGGLE OUT OF THIS, DIANE."

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FRASIER'S STILL UP IN THE WOODS.

"FRASIER'S STILL UP IN THE WOODS."

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HE'S SNIPE HUNTING. HA HA HA!

"HE'S SNIPE HUNTING. HA HA HA!"

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HA HA! YOU SENT HIM ON A SNIPE HUNT. I LOVE IT!

"HA HA! YOU SENT HIM ON A SNIPE HUNT. I LOVE IT!"

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WHAT'S A SNIPE HUNT?

"WHAT'S A SNIPE HUNT?"

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SNIPE HUNT IS AN AGE-OLD CUSTOM

"SNIPE HUNT IS AN AGE-OLD CUSTOM"

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WHEREIN WE TAKE UNINITIATED HUNTER, LIKE YOUR DR. CRANE,

"WHEREIN WE TAKE UNINITIATED HUNTER, LIKE YOUR DR. CRANE,"

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PUT HIM IN A CLEARING WITH A GUNNYSACK,

"PUT HIM IN A CLEARING WITH A GUNNYSACK,"

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AND THE REST OF US GO INTO THE BUSH TO BEAT OUT THE SNIPE TO HIM.

"AND THE REST OF US GO INTO THE BUSH TO BEAT OUT THE SNIPE TO HIM."

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RATHER AN ELEMENTAL SPORT, BUT I STILL DON'T SEE THE HUMOR IN IT.

"RATHER AN ELEMENTAL SPORT, BUT I STILL DON'T SEE THE HUMOR IN IT."

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THE HUMOR, DIANE, IS THAT WHILE THE GUY IS OUT THERE

"THE HUMOR, DIANE, IS THAT WHILE THE GUY IS OUT THERE"

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WITH A GUNNYSACK, WE GO OFF,

"WITH A GUNNYSACK, WE GO OFF,"

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HAVE A NICE DINNER IN A RESTAURANT,

"HAVE A NICE DINNER IN A RESTAURANT,"

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AND COME BACK HERE FOR SOME BEERS.

"AND COME BACK HERE FOR SOME BEERS."

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YOU SEE, THERE'S NO SUCH THING, REALLY, AS A SNIPE,

"YOU SEE, THERE'S NO SUCH THING, REALLY, AS A SNIPE,"

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SO THERE'S NO REAL REASON FOR ANY OF US TO HANG AROUND,

"SO THERE'S NO REAL REASON FOR ANY OF US TO HANG AROUND,"

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BUT SINCE THE BAGGER DOESN'T KNOW THAT,

"BUT SINCE THE BAGGER DOESN'T KNOW THAT,"

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HE STAYS, AND WE LEAVE.

"HE STAYS, AND WE LEAVE."

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I SWEAR TO YOU, THIS IS REALLY FUNNY, DIANE.

"I SWEAR TO YOU, THIS IS REALLY FUNNY, DIANE."

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REALLY FUNNY.

"REALLY FUNNY."

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YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN YOUR BUDDY OUT THERE--FRASIER.

"YOU SHOULD HAVE SEEN YOUR BUDDY OUT THERE--FRASIER."

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A REAL SPORT, DIANE.

"A REAL SPORT, DIANE."

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HE WAS PRACTICING THE BAGGER'S POSITION.

"HE WAS PRACTICING THE BAGGER'S POSITION."

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HA HA HA!

"HA HA HA!"

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