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Clips from Cheers - Coach Returns to Action (S01E01)

"Everybody, step right in here. Come on."
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"This is the home of Paul Revere."
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"- Looks like a bar to me. - The Reveres liked to entertain."
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"Walk around and soak up some atmosphere."
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"Give me a shot of bourbon."
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"What's this all about?"
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"It's a walking tour of Boston."
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"It's 30 degrees outside and my feet are throbbing."
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"Paul Revere's house is nowhere near here."
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"You wanna do this?"
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"I gotta fit in five more sites before six o'clock. I'll never make it."
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"We are also standing on the Grainery burying ground,"
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"the Olde Corner Bookstore and the Old North Church."
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"Let's get going, this is it for Boston."
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"- That's the whole tour? - Seemed to fly by, didn't it?"
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"Bid a fond adieu to Boston, the hub of New England."
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"I always thought Boston was a lot bigger."
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"It is in the summer."
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"Sure, sister, that'll be fine."
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"You're welcome."
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"I didn't know you had a sister."
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"That's Sister Theresa from St Matthias School for Girls."
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"She's sending a student over with a playbill."
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"St Matthias is a good school. I've had two kids thrown out of there."
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"- Afternoon, everybody. - Norm!"
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"- What's up, Norm? - My nipples. It's freezing."
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"So, how was your Sunday? Catch the Celtics-75ers game?"
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"Yes, and the Bruins-Flyers, the Ramos-Ramos fight."
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"Australian rules football."
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"Tomorrow, Boston College play lona. Put that money down, pal."
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"Doesn't your wife ever complain you never spend time with her?"
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"Would you?"
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"What I can't fathom is how one can drink cold beer in freezing weather."
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"- Cliff? Explanation. - How do you know he has one?"
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"Five bucks says he does, ten says it's a doozy."
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"- When the British ruled Punjab... - Ten bucks all the way."
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".. they drank steaming hot tea on the hottest days of the year"
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"to balance the inside and outside temperatures."
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"Conversely, drinking an ice-cold drink on a cold day"
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"results in a more comfortable body temperature."
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"Alright. Why do you drink ice-cold beer on a hot day?"
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"Mr Clavin?"
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"What else are you gonna do with it?"
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"I gotta get rid of a little now. I'll be in the little boys' room."
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"Hop on one leg, big boy."
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"The pipes are clogged up again. Nothing's working back there."
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"Sorry. Go up to Melville's again."
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"- Jacket in the same spot? - Yeah."
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"What a drag, having to dress up to go to the john."
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"Come on."
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"You men have it easy."
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"We have to wear taffeta and have the correct change."
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"Hey, that looks good. Who's your tailor?"
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"Give me a break. The sweater's a little bulky."
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"Have a good time up there, Ollie."
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"- I'm in the back with my pipes. - Wait."
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"- I've got an order. - Carla's got the bar."
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"That's right!"
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"OK, everybody! Carla's got the bar."
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"You can have anything you want, as long as it has no ice, straws,"
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"cherries, olives, mixer, umbrellas, fruits or flames."
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"An order."
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"I need an old-fashioned, a brandy Alexander and a martini."
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"Three beers coming up."
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"The damnedest thing. I've been shivering all the way over here."
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"Coach, you have no coat on, it's 30 degrees outside."
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"Thank God, I thought I had malaria."
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"Are you alright?"
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"I don't know where my mind is today."
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"I just remembered, I left it at Nina's apartment."
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"- Your mind? - No, my coat."
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"Who's Nina?"
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"A girl who moved into my building today. I helped her move some stuff."
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"It's the damnedest thing. I kept wanting to smell her neck."
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"To smell her neck?"
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"- It hit me what that's all about. - Physical attraction?"
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"No, Lux."
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"It used to be the soap of the stars."
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"Don't say anything about this to anybody, please."
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"- Why? - It's embarrassing."
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"If you're my friend, you won't say anything, OK?"
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"Coach, you're a normal, healthy man"
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"who's attracted to a woman. What's wrong there?"
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"She's a lot younger than me."
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"How much younger?"
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"You'll see, I told her where I work. She might drop in after she unpacks."
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"Hello."
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"Hi, sweetheart."
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"You're under arrest. Are you crazy?"
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"That's not her."
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"- Come on in. - I'm from St Matthias School."
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"Sam said I could put a playbill up."
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"- Good. - What play are you doing?"
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"It's a production of Twelve Angry Men,"
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"a taut, absorbing psychological drama."
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"When I was your age, we did Romeo and Juliet."
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"We were looking for something with more meat."
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"Thank you."
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"You're welcome, honey. I'll hang it up for you."
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"- Hi, Ernie. - Nina, hi. Welcome to Cheers."
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"Boy, it's nice and warm in here. My apartment is freezing."
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"I hope it's OK, the super's gonna call me here when the heat's on."
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"It's a great idea. Sit down, I'll show you the place."
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"Have a seat. Now, let's see."
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"This is the bar."
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"Those are the bottles. These are the glasses."
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"That's a stool. Any questions?"
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"I've always wondered what gas you use to pressurise those beer kegs."
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"Probably unleaded."
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"- Can I get you a drink? - White wine."
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"White wine. Diane, Nina. Nina, Diane."
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"- Hi. - Nice to meet you."
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"Diane is very smart. Say something very smart."
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"Tempus fugit."
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"- Coach, she's adorable. - Isn't she?"
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"Carla, come over a minute, will you?"
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"I'm busy."
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"Carla's been in a lousy mood for the last two, three years."
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"It's getting strange up there."
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"That's Norm. That's not Norm's jacket."
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