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Clips from The Goldbergs (2013) - I Drank the Mold! (S02E02)

"Adult adam: Back in the '80s, before you could"
The Goldbergs (2013)
"Buy music with the click of a button,"
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"You'd go to an actual record store to purchase your favorite cassette tapes."
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"We thought we'd reached the height of musical technology,"
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"Until this happened."
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"Whoa! Whoa!"
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"Adult adam: Behold, the cd,"
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"A disc surrounded by a case"
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"Within another, larger rectangular case."
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"It's a compact disc."
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"Oh, it's so beautiful."
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"I can't wait to go home and throw away"
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"My hundreds of useless cassettes."
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"We need to have this right now!"
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"You! Sam goody!"
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"That's the name of the store. My name's jared."
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"How much for a cd player?"
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"$900, plus tax."
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"We will never own one."
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"We will when I convince dad to buy us one."
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"And how do you plan on doing that?"
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"A little something I like to call "barry goldberg charm.""
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"Buy us a cd player!"
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"I don't know what that is,"
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"But I'm sure it's unnecessary and expensive."
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"It's the opposite of that."
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"Engineers in lab coats have created a musical experience"
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"That is so crisp and clean,"
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"It can literally improve your hearing."
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"No more music crap."
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"First, I bought you records, then eight-tracks, then cassettes."
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"Where does it end? Barry: Here!"
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"The technology ends here."
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"Cds are so good that scientists have given up and quit."
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"It's all over the paper. They're unemployed."
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"Let me take a swing at it, pal."
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"Dad, this is crazy important."
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"Music means everything to me. It's, like, my thing."
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"It's my thing, too."
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"Big tasty needs a cd player to keep up with the changing times."
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"See, that's the problem with you kids,"
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"Everything is your thing!"
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"Last month, I had to buy you tap shoes"
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"'cause dance was your thing."
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"And before that, fashion and skiing and horseback riding..."
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"Why do I get punished"
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"'cause she can't find something she's good at?"
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"Oh, don't get me started with you,"
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"With your hockey and karate and break-dancing."
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"Dad, this is different."
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"And so are the last hundred things. It's not happening."
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"Oh, it'll happen when I go upstairs"
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"And write the greatest song in the history of the world."
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"With a vicious rap interlude."
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"And when you hear my angelic song,"
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"You will weep and clap and be so moved"
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"That you will demand that we have a cd player."
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"I'm not an unreasonable man."
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"If you two write"
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"The greatest song in the history of the world,"
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"I will indeed buy you a cd player."
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"Great! Then I will"
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"Go write the greatest song in the world."
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"With a vicious rap interlude."
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"Good luck to you."
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"¶ I'm twisted up inside"
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"¶ but nonetheless I feel the need to say"
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"¶ I don't know the future"
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"¶ but the past keeps getting clearer every day ¶"
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"Adult adam: It was April 2, 1980-something, my birthday."
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"And that meant one thing,"
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"Desperately avoiding an onslaught of love from my mom."
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"Birthday boy sighting! Oh!"
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"(laughs)"
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"It's my little love muffin's birthday."
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"And how do I know?"
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"Because I grew your body in my body."
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"Will you stop bringing that up?"
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"We all know where I came from."
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"We are gonna go all out and party hearty."
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"Yeah, about that..."
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"I was thinking this year, I just hit the arcade with chad."
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"Oh, poop. It's your big day."
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"We've got to do something special."
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"Mom, I know I've said this"
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"Every day for the past two weeks,"
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"But I'm in middle school now,"
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"And birthday parties are not cool."
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"Fine, moody judy."
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"You can celebrate with no family and no fanfare."
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"But before you go, can I at least give you my present?"
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"It's down in the basement."
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"I think you're really gonna love it."
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"All: Surprise!"
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"Adult adam: And there it was, my mom went behind my back"
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"And invited my friends over for a stupid little-kid party!"
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"(whispering) what have you done?"
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"All my friends are gonna think this is super-lame."
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"Yo, mrs. G, digging this "o" dip. Mmm."
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"And why did you invite garry ball?"
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"He's super-cool and gets away with murder"
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"'cause his dad's the principal!"
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"Oh, nonsense."
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"Okay, kiddos,"
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"I've scored everything you're gonna need"
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"To have a raging slumber party."
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"Jolt cola, pixy stix, mad libs, ouija board,"
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"And a pen to draw on the first dorkus who falls asleep."
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"I'm looking at you, dave sirota."
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"(beverly laughs)"
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"Burn!"
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"I am a funny mom. Jam on."
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"Adult adam: My friends were gonna give me hell."
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"This was the epitome of uncool!"
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"Dude, this is gonna be so rad."
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"Really? You guys are actually stoked about a slumber party?"
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"Slumber party? I thought this was a sleepover."
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"What's the difference?"
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"Ha! Stupid chad kremp doesn't know the difference."
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"Someone should tell him in great detail"
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