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Clips from 10-Year-Old-Tom - Skipping School/Cooking the Books (S01E01)

"- Yeah, Tom! - I'm a believer!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Hey, hey, hey, come on, you guys."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I believe we should have an old Italian man"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"feeding us gelato throughout the day."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I hear you, baby! - Yes, say it!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Gelato? - All I know is this."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I believe my name is Tom,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"and I believe I'm running for treasurer."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Thank you. - Yeah, Tom!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Go, Tom! Whoo!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Gotta believe."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- All right, gang. Well, listen."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"This is our first student council meeting."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Woo! - So there you go."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I like the enthusiasm."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Let's introduce our brand-new president."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Take it away, Dakota. - Okay, thank you."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Uh, guys, our first order of business"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"is to discuss these insane promises Tom made"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"to become treasurer."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, no, no, those weren't promises."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I just listed things I believe in."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"So I think we're good to go here."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Good to go? Tom, you lied to everyone."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- No, I stretched the truth. It's very common."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- What was the truth part?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Gelato clearly exists."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"No one's disputing that, are they?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"If you're gonna be sticklers about it,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I mean, let's just purchase all the stuff"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"and be done with it, right? Meeting adjourned."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- First of all, you can't adjourn a meeting."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Treasurers can't adjourn meetings."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, no, the treasurer is all--"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"all powerful. - What?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I thought I'm the boss. What happened?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- How would you pay for all this stuff?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- How would I pay? That's not my department."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Yes, it is! - I'm just the treasurer."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I don't think he knows what a treasurer does."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I obviously know what a treasurer is"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"if I ran for the job. I-- - So what is it?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I oversee the inner workings of the school."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Even you know you're full of you-know-what."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- No, okay, I have to stop this right here."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Not a strong first meeting."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Tom, I worked very hard to become class president,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"and I need my first hundred days to go well."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Okay. - My father is a CPA."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I want you to go to his office tonight,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"and he'll teach you his, uh, quote, "accounting tricks.""
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Got it? - Oh, no, please, no."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Anyone but your dad. He's messed up."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"You gotta admit, Dakota, your dad is messed up."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- He's got his issues, but when it comes to, quote,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
""cooking the books," unquote,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"he's the best in the biz."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Now, listen, Tom, right out of the gate"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"let's address the elephant in the room."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I mean, I did some weird stuff on that fishing trip."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- It was. It was very weird."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Trying to bang an escort in front of a little kid."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Who does that? - That was a lot to process."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Peeing in a circle. I mean, that's not for me."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I don't know why I went along with it."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- So Dakota tells me you need my help."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I miscalculated by, like, 20 grand."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Well, this should be easy."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"[upbeat rap music playing]"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- What's happening?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Bang! Eight Gs just like that out of nowhere."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Wow. - Depreciate some assets there,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"move that over there. Yeah, take that, number seven."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Wow, you really get into this, don't you?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"You're taking your shirt off, oh, my God!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Well, it's gotta come off, Tom,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I'm a superhuman computer."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Feels inappropriate, but let's keep adding."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Yeah! Ah, fund it, baby, fund it."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, my God."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Yeah, feels good, doesn't it, Tom?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- It's a little weird but-- - Yeah."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Take that down your throat, number five."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- This is on the up and up? We can do all this?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- We can do anything we damn well please."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"We're accountants, bitch. - You calling me a bitch or--"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- The secret is to create a document that's so thick"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"no one will take the time to read it."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"And...done. - All right, great."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Thanks for all your help. - All right."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- The whole thing was great, a lot of fun."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"The music, the taking the shirt off."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"The whole thing was really great."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Good news, principal. I found the money."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- What is this?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Feast your eyes on the new budget."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Okay, I gotta ask you. How did you find this money?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- You know, I ran the numbers, crunched the, uh, math."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"It's all in the document. Feel free to read it."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Uh, how many pages is that? - Exactly 1,000."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Wow, okay. - I just need an approval."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"If you wanna read it, that's on you."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Well, you know what, Tom?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I trust you, it's approved. - Amazing."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- A rock climbing wall. Wow, Tom."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"How much did this thing cost?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Don't worry about the money. That's my department."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- All right, everybody! Who likes gum?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Boom! - This is amazing!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Bubble-licious!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Wait, did he fly you in from Italy?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- He doesn't speak English, but yes, I flew him in."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"That's right, rock climbing wall compliments of Tom."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Thank Tom, Tom the treasurer!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"He got you this gum! Yeah!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- All right, enjoy, everyone."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Remember who got this for you, Gelato Tom."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Hey, hey, hey. Come on in, guys."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Hey, hi. - Hey."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I'm proud of you, Dakota."
10-Year-Old-Tom
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