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Clips from 10-Year-Old-Tom - Skipping School/Cooking the Books (S01E01)

"we can get a smoothie and some throw pillows."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Who's with me?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- You know what? We'll meet you in there."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Go team."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Guys, we are so not meeting him in there."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- What? - The clock is ticking,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"and we need to do something wrong."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Use your brain, Tom! Think!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"What would the janitor do?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- What would the janitor do?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- The world's crazy so you get crazy."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Get in the trash, you little rebels."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Why don't you poop in your hand"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"and throw it everywhere?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Let's not do any of that. - Okay, I have an idea."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"What if we steal the bus?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- All right, stop. - Oh, snap."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- You like it? - If we drive the bus"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"even ten feet, we will be legends."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Guys, we're not driving a bus, obviously."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, come on, man. You read about"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"these stories all the time."
10-Year-Old-Tom
""Little kid went on a joyride."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"What a little rascal.""
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- That won't be the headline here."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"It's gonna be "Tom murders multiple people.""
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- You gotta be 18 to murder somebody."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"If you young, it's a joyride."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- The desk is on fire! Let it burn!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Guys, let's bring it down, all right?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Eat my shoe, sub!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- That was uncalled for."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"[phone dialing]"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- 911, what's your emergency?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Yes, hi, I need to report some missing kids."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I am at a school."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I believe the name is Shady Oaks Elementary."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Wait a minute, you believe?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Yeah, I believe-- I think I saw it."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- You don't know the name of the school?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I believe its name is Shady Oaks Elementary."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Hold on, are you a substitute teacher?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Yes, ma'am, I am."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I don't know what that has to do with anything."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Sorry to say, sir,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"we do not take calls from substitutes."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"It's a state-wide policy. - Excuse me?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Well, you're really unreliable sources,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"and you can't retain information."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I'm a grown, mature man,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"and I am reporting some missing children."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I'm sorry, goodbye."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Did you just hang up? Did 911 just hang up on me?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I don't feel good about this."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I don't feel good about this at all."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Woah, woah, woah. Keep us steady."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Straighten it out a little bit. - I'm trying."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I don't have the upper body strength."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, my gosh. Straighten it out, Tom."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I can't control the vehicle."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Tom, we are in the grass. Straighten her out!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, no, what am I hitting? What is that sound?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Bushes or people? - Uh-oh."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Everybody, head between your knees."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Brace for impact. We're hitting something."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Iceberg! [crash]"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"[car alarm beeping]"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Guys, we just crashed into my mom's car."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"This is amazing! - Amazing? This is a disaster."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I crashed into my mom's car"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"in a stolen bus"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"with Tom, of all people, who she hates."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I can't wait to see the look on her face."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I'm so confused right now. - All right, you know what?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I'm not gonna stick around for this."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Guys, what's the point"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"if I don't get credit for it?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"I need her to know it was me."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- You gotta work this out in therapy."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"We outta here. - Here we go."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"[car alarm beeping]"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- "Please don't be mad."
10-Year-Old-Tom
""We took the bus."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"It happens.""
10-Year-Old-Tom
"[sighs]"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Rule number one of bus driving,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"never leave the kids in a running bus."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"They steal it every time."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Okay, we're about to become legends."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- They're gonna talk about us for generations."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"We are the kids who stole the bus."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Woah, guys, look. - Oh, my God."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- There's cops, there's teachers."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"This is amazing. We're gonna be on the news."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Just tell them it was all your idea."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Tom really was a bystander."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I know what I'm gonna say, I'm ready."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Okay, you got me."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- "You got me"? That was your big zinger?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Uh, hello? Criminal here."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, my God, Dakota. there you are."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"You've missed, like, so much."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"The sub is, like, totally losing it."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"He was slapping himself and just, like, freaking out"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"and was like, "No one respects me!""
10-Year-Old-Tom
"And now he's, uh, threatening"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"to jump off the building. - I'll do it!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Maybe you'll appreciate me when I'm gone!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"How do you find a sub for a sub?"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"It can't be done!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Sir, to be honest, I don't know your name,"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"but we value you at this school."
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- Oh, please! No one respects me!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"- I respect you. - Here, we'll do a little test!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Let's hear a round of applause"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"from everyone here that respects me!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"Crickets!"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"That kid right there, he told me"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"he had an appointment for a chiropractor"
10-Year-Old-Tom
"so he could skip school and I believed him."
10-Year-Old-Tom
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