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Clips from Bob's Burgers - Manic Pixie Crap Show (S12E12)

"even though I would call them slight‐hill biking videos."
Bob's Burgers
"And I have my Mom's phone,"
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"so I'll be able to see what you see and hear what you hear."
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"‐Uh... ‐I told them I was upgrading their ringtone."
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"They were both very excited."
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"Millie, what is going on?"
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"Have you heard about the Pixie Princess Promenade?"
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"‐Oh, no. ‐Where pixie princesses take you on a magical adventure"
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"through the park ‐that changes you forever? ‐No, please."
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"I've been on nine of them. I may have gotten"
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"a little intense on the last one."
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"I allegedly headbutted a gnome in the chest."
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"And then I was disinvited to pixie‐ticipate."
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"Don't say this is where I come in."
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"‐So this is where you come in. ‐Oh, God."
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"I need you to do the Pixie Princess Promenade for me."
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"I need some pixie princess action."
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"Plus, they hand out wands at the end."
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"I already have eight wands, but I need more."
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"I want all the colors, I want all the flowers."
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"They put different flower stickers on the wands."
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"I want pink rose. You're gonna get me pink rose."
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"Um... no. Definitely not, never, no."
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"Well, then I am forced and legally allowed"
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"to demand that you give me back the Slug‐gitive card."
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"Ugh! I knew there had to be strings attached with that card."
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"Okay, so if I get you the wand, then we're square?"
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"Square as a bear in a chair with no hair. (gasps)"
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"There are the pixie princesses and the pixie princess queen."
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"Oh, dear Lord."
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"Whoa. Is that a magical flying sex worker convention?"
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"Oh, it's the Pixie Princess Promenade."
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"‐The what? ‐I did it a few times when I was younger."
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"It was fun. Then I moved on to horses."
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"And I've been chasing that H ever since."
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"Oh, I almost forgot. My pixie wings."
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"‐Ugh. ‐Now you can sparkle and fly with the pixies up high."
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"This is gonna be the best three hours of your life! Aah!"
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"‐I think I'm gonna throw up. ‐From enchantment?"
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"Oh, God. So girly."
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"Hey. May we, uh, join you? We're just taking a break."
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"Also our fake Frisbee got stuck in a tree."
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"So what's, uh... what's going on?"
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"Louise is doing the Pixie"
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"Princess Promenade for me 'cause I'm banned."
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"‐Okay. ‐I got a pixie haircut once."
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"It worked until it didn't."
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"LOUISE: Tina? Gene? Is that you? I need you"
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"to find a rock, throw it at my head,"
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"and I'll have myself a nice rock nap."
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"MILLIE: Oh, I love how excited we both are, Louise."
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"‐Why, hello. I'm Pixie Princess Patricia. ‐(loud gasps)"
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"Would you like to go on a Pixie Princess adventure?"
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"‐ALL: Yay! ‐Ugh."
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"Only pixies allowed, so human parents and guardians,"
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"we ask you to wait in what you call "the parking lot.""
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"ALL: Yay!"
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"What a wonderful day."
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"I've been busy using my magic wand"
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"to make the flowers extra pretty."
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"And I was just about to enjoy a nice twirl in the sunlight."
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"Do you pixies know how to twirl?"
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"‐ALL: Yeah. ‐Let's all twirl together."
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"‐ALL: Yeah! ‐Ugh."
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"MILLIE: Louise, I need you to twirl."
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"‐Millie, please. ‐Twirl."
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"(Louise groans)"
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"Yes!"
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"Oh, wait. My wings are tingling."
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"The other pixie princesses must be trying to tell me something."
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"(gasps): Oh, no!"
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"It seems someone has stolen"
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"the Pixie Princess Queen's sparkle sprinkles."
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"That's what gives our magic wands their magic power."
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"Is sparkle sprinkles drugs?"
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"I don't remember. I don't think so?"
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"We've got to find the Princess Queen's sparkle sprinkles."
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"But first, let's twirl again"
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"‐for strength. Twirl! ‐ALL: Yeah! ‐Ugh."
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"I remember when I could twirl. Then time caught up with me."
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"Now I get dizzy looking at a rotisserie chicken."
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"So, yeah, kablam."
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"And then it was hot dogs and a dead dog. Ha!"
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"But now I got this guy. You know what?"
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"I'm gonna go get the spray bottle"
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"and give him a little spritz."
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"‐He's looking a little wilty. ‐Okay, sounds good."
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"‐♪ La‐la‐la, la, la‐la‐la‐la ♪ ‐Bob?"
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"‐♪ Bottle cap two. ♪ ‐Bob? Bob?"
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"What? Why are you whispering?"
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"That was the saddest story I've ever heard in my life."
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"I think maybe Linda never processed Bottle Cap's death."
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"Yeah. It is weird she never mentioned it."
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"Maybe she tried to block it out?"
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"Or maybe you haven't been a sensitive enough partner"
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"for her to feel safe opening up to you?"
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"‐What? ‐It's probably the first thing."
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"And, you know, those flowers are gonna die in a few days."
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"And then what? What if she spirals?"
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"I don't know. Uh, maybe she... won't?"
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"Here ya go. Doesn't that feel nice?"
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"♪ I'm gonna take care of you so you live forever ♪"
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"♪ I haven't looked it up ♪"
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"♪ But I'm pretty sure it's possible, yeah. ♪"
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"Hrr‐hrr, hrr‐hrr."
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"♪ Rainbows and unicorns and butterflies and buttercups ♪"
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"‐♪ And dew drops and daffodils ♪ ‐Nope."
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"♪ And how 'bout more buttercups? ♪"
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"‐Hey. ‐Hi. How ya doing?"
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"Hmm. I'm guessing gnome guy stole the sparkle sprinkles."
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"Seems like a gnome thing to do."
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"MILLIE: There's, uh, no way to know."
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"You just got to enjoy the ride."
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"Is that the guy you headbutted?"
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"Uh, yeah, but the headbutting was about something else."
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"Politics."
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"Huh. I bet that's where this all ends."
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"I bet that's where the wands are."
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"Wait, what? Where are you going?"
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"I just have to get the pink rose wand, right?"
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