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Clips from Severance - The Grim Barbarity of Optics and Design (S01E01)

"What do you mean? Like, with your paychecks?"
Severance
"No, I've just been hearing stuff. Just around."
Severance
"Who've you been talking to?"
Severance
"So…"
Severance
"Um…"
Severance
"What?"
Severance
"Do you remember the businessman?"
Severance
"- [groans] - Oh. [stammers]"
Severance
"Holy fucking pit of hell!"
Severance
"[Ricken] Okay. Darling, you okay?"
Severance
"- [groans] Why do people do this? - Uh, I'll go get Alexa."
Severance
"- Great. - [groans] Don't touch me, baby."
Severance
"- Okay. - Ah!"
Severance
"- [Alexa] One more big push. - [Ricken] Oh, my God."
Severance
"[Alexa] She's right here. She's right here. You're doing so great."
Severance
"- [Devon straining] It hurt-- It hurts. - I know it hurts but she's right here."
Severance
"- I can see her. She's crowning. Okay? - [Ricken] Oh, my God."
Severance
"[Alexa] All right, now. You know, I can see her. Here she comes."
Severance
"[cell phone buzzing]"
Severance
"[buzzing continues]"
Severance
"- [Devon screams, groans, strains] - [Ricken] Whew."
Severance
"- [Devon] Oh, my God. [groans] - [Alexa] She's coming."
Severance
"[Ricken groans] Oh, my God."
Severance
"- [Ricken] Oh, my God. - [baby cries]"
Severance
"[Alexa] Oh!"
Severance
"[Ricken] Thank you. Oh, she did great. I'm gonna pass out."
Severance
"[Mr. Milchick] She was in outie form at the time she woke up."
Severance
"So this will be innie Helly's first conscious experience since the hanging."
Severance
"When she sees you, it's important your eyes be kind."
Severance
"Do you know how to make your eyes kind?"
Severance
"Um…"
Severance
"[Helly gasping, panting]"
Severance
"You're okay."
Severance
"You're okay. It's all right."
Severance
"[breathes deeply]"
Severance
"So they locked away the extension cords and other dangerous items so, you know,"
Severance
"you should be safe."
Severance
"And if you wanna focus on looking for happy numbers for a while,"
Severance
"- that's fine. - [laughs]"
Severance
"Yeah."
Severance
"Do you wanna talk about it?"
Severance
"We should hide inspirational handbook quotes"
Severance
"around the office for her to stumble upon."
Severance
"She just needs to start earning perks, dude."
Severance
"I'd end my life if I didn't have any finger traps yet."
Severance
"You know, what one of us should do is lend her our trap"
Severance
"until she has one of her own."
Severance
"Yeah, but not me though 'cause I already contributed the idea."
Severance
"It's only fair."
Severance
"Ms. Casey."
Severance
"I'm here to observe Helly R."
Severance
"Oh. Uh, no one told me."
Severance
"Ms. Cobel's orders. I am to watch her for signs of sadness,"
Severance
"and verbally encourage her to forgo further suicide attempts."
Severance
"Upon request, I can also perform a hug."
Severance
"You know I've been, uh, exhibiting signs of sadness. Could I get one of those?"
Severance
"No."
Severance
"[Irving chuckles]"
Severance
"[scoffs] Did you get all that?"
Severance
"Are you upset?"
Severance
"No. I'm peachy."
Severance
"If you're upset, you can request a--"
Severance
"A hug. I know. I'm good."
Severance
"Irv."
Severance
"We lose you again there, buddy?"
Severance
"Irv?"
Severance
"I have to go to O&D."
Severance
"Something's come up."
Severance
"And I-- I'd like to seek Burt's counsel."
Severance
"[sighs] Well…"
Severance
"Okay, fine. Just make a copy of that map in case we have to come find you."
Severance
"Oh, God."
Severance
"- [gasps] - Oh, no. I'm sorry, Irving."
Severance
"We must have sent this print job here by mistake. You weren't supposed to see this."
Severance
"What are these? [breathes shakily]"
Severance
"Nothing. A joke for Ms. Cobel."
Severance
"It's the O&D coup, isn't it? The one that Dylan talks about, huh?"
Severance
"Did that actually happen, Mr. Milchick?"
Severance
"Of course not. Nothing like that could happen here."
Severance
"[stammers]"
Severance
"It's proof. It is ironclad proof."
Severance
"Milchick says it didn't happen."
Severance
"And why would one department physically attack another?"
Severance
"Lumon wouldn't just then give them all the other department's resources."
Severance
"Does O&D know that? Are we even sure about it?"
Severance
"Because with seven people, there is a lot that they could do to us."
Severance
"- I could ask-- - Your new friend,"
Severance
"who lied to you about the size of his department?"
Severance
"How do we know what else he isn't being kosher about?"
Severance
"You ran a 266 on Irving B.?"
Severance
"Yeah. Just now."
Severance
"Huh."
Severance
"I thought it might dissuade him from spending so much time with Burt G."
Severance
"I'm sorry. Should I have consulted you?"
Severance
"No, no. Good initiative."
Severance
"I saw Ms. Casey down there."
Severance
"You're having her watch Helly R."
Severance
"I am."
Severance
"May I ask why?"
Severance
""The light of discovery shines truer upon a virgin meadow than a beaten path.""
Severance
"I'm trying something new with Ms. Casey."
Severance
"Keep it between us."
Severance
"- Right. - [door slams]"
Severance
"[breathing heavily]"
Severance
"Helly R."
Severance
"Hi, Ms. Casey."
Severance
"Please describe for me your time in the restroom."
Severance
"Oh, no. [groans] I'm so sorry, Ms. Casey. I just-- I-I-- Ugh. I turned and--"
Severance
"Bet you're drunk. What'd your mouth taste like when you got in today?"
Severance
"Helly R., you have to come with me to distribution supply."
Severance
"[sighs] That's okay. I can watch Helly R. while you're gone."
Severance
"It's only a few minutes, right?"
Severance
"Distribution supply is eight minutes, round trip."
Severance
"You know, I go to distribution supply all the time, so I could, uh-- If you--"
Severance
"Well, that's one less horrible thing."
Severance
"For eight minutes anyway."
Severance
"Helly, I just realized I haven't shown you where we keep the extra pen caps."
Severance
"It's not far. Do you mind?"
Severance
"I'm good, thanks."
Severance
"Nah, you're right. We shouldn't go anywhere without Ms. Casey."
Severance
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