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Clips from Hubie Halloween

"Oh, my soup!"
Hubie Halloween
"It's not even dark yet here in Salem,"
Hubie Halloween
"but the spooky vibes are gettin' heavy, baby."
Hubie Halloween
"We'll get through it together here on…"
Hubie Halloween
"Halloween central."
Hubie Halloween
"Mr. Lambert."
Hubie Halloween
"What are you up to?"
Hubie Halloween
"Hubie. Yeah."
Hubie Halloween
"I wa..."
Hubie Halloween
"Last night, I thought I felt a little draft. So…"
Hubie Halloween
"Yeah, that October wind will... It'll sneak up on you."
Hubie Halloween
"Sure does."
Hubie Halloween
"Say, Mr. Lambert."
Hubie Halloween
"How old are you?"
Hubie Halloween
"You mean in human years?"
Hubie Halloween
"Yes."
Hubie Halloween
"I don't really believe in keeping track of that kind of thing, Hubie."
Hubie Halloween
"You know, age is just a state of mind."
Hubie Halloween
"That's why I played T-ball till I was 25."
Hubie Halloween
"Hubie Dubois."
Hubie Halloween
"I can't believe it's finally Halloween."
Hubie Halloween
"My parents got me a royal princess dress from the Disney Store."
Hubie Halloween
"- Cooky, what are you gonna dress up as? - A robot."
Hubie Halloween
"You should go as a girl who doesn't even know who her real parents are."
Hubie Halloween
"Oh, that's who you are every day."
Hubie Halloween
"O'Doyle!"
Hubie Halloween
"Yes, Miss Taylor?"
Hubie Halloween
"Maybe you should go as a butt-faced, red-haired piece of dog puke"
Hubie Halloween
"who's reading at a second-grade level even though he's 11."
Hubie Halloween
"Ooh!"
Hubie Halloween
"Attention, first through sixth graders."
Hubie Halloween
"We have a special presentation today in lieu of recess."
Hubie Halloween
"Here again to talk about Halloween safety"
Hubie Halloween
"is Salem's Official Volunteer Halloween Helper,"
Hubie Halloween
"Hubert Dubois."
Hubie Halloween
"Oh, God."
Hubie Halloween
"Are those pee stains?"
Hubie Halloween
"Hello, Webster Elementary School."
Hubie Halloween
"I am not a ghost, but I play one on TV."
Hubie Halloween
"Just playing."
Hubie Halloween
"My name is Hubie Dubois, and I am here to tell you that Halloween is fun,"
Hubie Halloween
"but we must stay out of the danger zone."
Hubie Halloween
"Hey! Hey! Hey!"
Hubie Halloween
"Let him speak. He's a human being!"
Hubie Halloween
"Thank you, sir. I would like a word with you all."
Hubie Halloween
"And that word is…"
Hubie Halloween
"G-ghost?"
Hubie Halloween
"{\an8}Ghost. Scary. But also the key to Halloween safety."
Hubie Halloween
"The G."
Hubie Halloween
"{\an8}- What could the G stand for? - Go home?"
Hubie Halloween
"No. Give."
Hubie Halloween
"Give to the less fortunate. Does anyone know what less fortunate is?"
Hubie Halloween
"- Yes, sir. - It means someone who needs help."
Hubie Halloween
"Very good. What's your name?"
Hubie Halloween
"- Cooky. - Well, you're a smart cookie."
Hubie Halloween
"When I was young, I used to build a tower with all my candy."
Hubie Halloween
"And all the candy that was part of the tower before it collapsed,"
Hubie Halloween
"I would keep for myself."
Hubie Halloween
"The leftover candy, I would donate to the homeless shelter."
Hubie Halloween
"Is that where you live?"
Hubie Halloween
"Well, son..."
Hubie Halloween
"Burn him!"
Hubie Halloween
"Oh."
Hubie Halloween
"I'm sorry, son. I just..."
Hubie Halloween
"Please... please don't cry."
Hubie Halloween
"I feel bad for him."
Hubie Halloween
"Yeah. No, baby. He overstayed his welcome."
Hubie Halloween
"We're out of food, I guess. Yeah?"
Hubie Halloween
"Hey. What can I get you guys?"
Hubie Halloween
"Hi. Can I get a black coffee?"
Hubie Halloween
"Coffee?"
Hubie Halloween
"- Not hot chocolate? - Oh, I don't drink hot chocolate anymore."
Hubie Halloween
"- You had one this morning. - Well, I quit."
Hubie Halloween
"Okay. Well, I'm gonna need to see some ID, freshman."
Hubie Halloween
"ID? I don't…"
Hubie Halloween
"I'm just kidding. One black coffee."
Hubie Halloween
"So, how'd you know I was a freshman?"
Hubie Halloween
"Oh, I see you in the hallways"
Hubie Halloween
"and it's pretty obvious. What are you guys doing for Halloween?"
Hubie Halloween
"Well, I'm taking my sisters trick-or-treating."
Hubie Halloween
"And my mom's at work, so I kind of run the house when she's gone."
Hubie Halloween
"- So, you're not going to the party? - Yeah, I'm going."
Hubie Halloween
"- Which party? - One manly black coffee."
Hubie Halloween
"That's me."
Hubie Halloween
"The big barn at Wallace Orchard. It's mostly juniors and seniors."
Hubie Halloween
"Hmm. Yeah. Well, maybe after my mom comes home, I'll... I'll try to swing by."
Hubie Halloween
"Try hard."
Hubie Halloween
"Did you suddenly get cool?"
Hubie Halloween
"Oops!"
Hubie Halloween
"Sorry, freshman."
Hubie Halloween
"Michael Mundi in the house!"
Hubie Halloween
"It comes and goes."
Hubie Halloween
"Well, all you witches and warlocks, the daylight is fading,"
Hubie Halloween
"and you know what that means. Halloween in Salem is in full effect."
Hubie Halloween
"Now, we have an old friend on the line, Hubie Dubie."
Hubie Halloween
"Hi, I like... I wanna make a request, please?"
Hubie Halloween
"If you can play the theme song"
Hubie Halloween
"from the film Ghostbusters by Ray Parker Jr."
Hubie Halloween
"Hubie, you need to turn down your radio."
Hubie Halloween
"- We talked about this before. - I just keep hearing myself."
Hubie Halloween
"- Hubie. - Okay, there it is."
Hubie Halloween
"Thank you, Aurora."
Hubie Halloween
"Turn down the radio."
Hubie Halloween
"Who is that?"
Hubie Halloween
"- Just hang up your phone. - Please stop."
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"- That's not funny. - All good, baby, okay?"
Hubie Halloween
"- Thanks for calling. - Sit on it, pal."
Hubie Halloween
"That man on the radio sounds like the guy who talked to us in the cafeteria today."
Hubie Halloween
"Oh, did you get a Hubie Dubois Halloween safety talk?"
Hubie Halloween
"I think so. Is he a good guy?"
Hubie Halloween
"'Cause the whole school was throwing food and sharp objects at him."
Hubie Halloween
"Hubie Dubois is probably the nicest guy in this town."
Hubie Halloween
"Do you like him?"
Hubie Halloween
"No. He... You know, he's just..."
Hubie Halloween
"- He's the nicest. - You said this already."
Hubie Halloween
"Well, take it from me. Nice matters."
Hubie Halloween
"The scariest night of the year has arrived, kiddies."
Hubie Halloween
"It's gonna be a full moon, so the monsters will be out."
Hubie Halloween
"I hope you've made all the necessary preparations."
Hubie Halloween
"And have your costumes all picked out."
Hubie Halloween
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