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Clips from Cheers - Knights of the Scimitar (S05E05)

We're to welcome Our newest member

"We're to welcome Our newest member"

Cheers

Into the knights Of the scimitar.

"Into the knights Of the scimitar."

Cheers

Ah, yes. Stand up, Norm peterson, And be welcomed.

"Ah, yes. Stand up, Norm peterson, And be welcomed."

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Norm, why don't you Tell us a little Bit about yourself.

"Norm, why don't you Tell us a little Bit about yourself."

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Well, there's really Nothing to say, guys.

"Well, there's really Nothing to say, guys."

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Now, don't be modest.

"Now, don't be modest."

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No, i mean it. There's Really nothing to say.

"No, i mean it. There's Really nothing to say."

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See, i was born In chicago.

"See, i was born In chicago."

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I moved to boston and Became an accountant.

"I moved to boston and Became an accountant."

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Are you married?

"Are you married?"

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Yeah.

"Yeah."

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To?

"To?"

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Long.

"Long."

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By the way, In case you guys need A good accountant,

"By the way, In case you guys need A good accountant,"

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I did happen to bring Some of my business Cards along.

"I did happen to bring Some of my business Cards along."

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Sorry, norm. I guess You didn't get the word.

"Sorry, norm. I guess You didn't get the word."

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It's against the rules To do business with Fellow lodge members.

"It's against the rules To do business with Fellow lodge members."

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You know, cliff said...

"You know, cliff said..."

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My fault for listening.

"My fault for listening."

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Well, norm. The time Has now arrived...

"Well, norm. The time Has now arrived..."

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For you to undergo The initiation ritual.

"For you to undergo The initiation ritual."

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Stand, please.

"Stand, please."

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Approach me.

"Approach me."

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Are you prepared?

"Are you prepared?"

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Yeah.

"Yeah."

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[Gong]

"[Gong]"

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Congratulations!

"Congratulations!"

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Just like that, huh?

"Just like that, huh?"

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That's it. Grab a hat And sword out of the bin.

"That's it. Grab a hat And sword out of the bin."

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My god, The pageantry!

"My god, The pageantry!"

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Ok. Our next order Of business...

"Ok. Our next order Of business..."

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Look, I'm sorry about That business.

"Look, I'm sorry about That business."

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I didn't know. I guess--

"I didn't know. I guess--"

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Great time To find out.

"Great time To find out."

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If it's any Consolation,

"If it's any Consolation,"

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These guys give Great parties.

"These guys give Great parties."

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Ho ho ho, hey.

"Ho ho ho, hey."

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I thought this Was gonna be Really stupid,

"I thought this Was gonna be Really stupid,"

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But these are a good Bunch of guys.

"But these are a good Bunch of guys."

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Have i ever Steered you wrong?

"Have i ever Steered you wrong?"

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Yeah. That's why i Thought it was gonna Be stupid.

"Yeah. That's why i Thought it was gonna Be stupid."

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Too bad about The business stuff,

"Too bad about The business stuff,"

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But i feel Pretty comfortable With these guys.

"But i feel Pretty comfortable With these guys."

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Thank you For sponsoring me.

"Thank you For sponsoring me."

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Can't wait for some Of these parties.

"Can't wait for some Of these parties."

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Oh, before i forget,

"Oh, before i forget,"

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The referendum that we ban Beer at all lodge functions Has been passed.

"The referendum that we ban Beer at all lodge functions Has been passed."

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Good-bye!

"Good-bye!"

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So, what time's Peewee coming in?

"So, what time's Peewee coming in?"

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If you're Referring to lance,

"If you're Referring to lance,"

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I'm expecting Him shortly--

"I'm expecting Him shortly--"

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Soon.

"Soon."

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And i don't appreciate These constant attempts To denigrate him.

"And i don't appreciate These constant attempts To denigrate him."

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Let me ask you A question.

"Let me ask you A question."

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What do you See in him?

"What do you See in him?"

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You mean besides A young, brainy,

"You mean besides A young, brainy,"

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Stunningly gorgeous man

"Stunningly gorgeous man"

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With many interests Similar to mine,

"With many interests Similar to mine,"

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Who's fawning over me And giving me all the attention I could ever ask for?

"Who's fawning over me And giving me all the attention I could ever ask for?"

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Yeah.

"Yeah."

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I see...

"I see..."

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What i used To see in you

"What i used To see in you"

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Before you decided To spend the last few months

"Before you decided To spend the last few months"

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Flogging me with your apathy.

"Flogging me with your apathy."

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I'm sorry, diane, But that's all I had handy.

"I'm sorry, diane, But that's all I had handy."

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Hi, diane.

"Hi, diane."

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Have you made a decision?

"Have you made a decision?"

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Have i, sam?

"Have i, sam?"

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Send me a post card.

"Send me a post card."

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I don't think i can go

"I don't think i can go"

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Because it would upset Someone too much.

"Because it would upset Someone too much."

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Diane, go with Someone's blessings.

"Diane, go with Someone's blessings."

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Excuse me.

"Excuse me."

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May i speak with you For a moment?

"May i speak with you For a moment?"

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Hop up on A stool there, Lance.

"Hop up on A stool there, Lance."

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Carla, why don't You pour him a beer.

"Carla, why don't You pour him a beer."

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I know you're Still smarting

"I know you're Still smarting"

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From my turning down Your proposal Of marriage,

"From my turning down Your proposal Of marriage,"

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But how long can You drag this out?

"But how long can You drag this out?"

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You're hurting me But you're also Hurting yourself

"You're hurting me But you're also Hurting yourself"

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With this feigned Indifference.

"With this feigned Indifference."

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Well, while we're talking About hurting people,

"Well, while we're talking About hurting people,"

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How do you think Lance is gonna feel

"How do you think Lance is gonna feel"

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When he finds out You're using him To get to me?

"When he finds out You're using him To get to me?"

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I am not using him.

"I am not using him."

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I like him.

"I like him."

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He treats me Wonderfully.

"He treats me Wonderfully."

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And i don't, So go with him.

"And i don't, So go with him."

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Mr. Malone, i'm about To call your bluff.

"Mr. Malone, i'm about To call your bluff."

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I'm going to go With him,

"I'm going to go With him,"

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And i'm going to have A great time,

"And i'm going to have A great time,"

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And it will leave you A hollow, broken man.

"And it will leave you A hollow, broken man."

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All right. All right.

"All right. All right."

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Just watch while i give You a little preview

"Just watch while i give You a little preview"

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Of our weekend together.

"Of our weekend together."

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I'm going to kiss him In front of you and the Whole bar,

"I'm going to kiss him In front of you and the Whole bar,"

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And it's going To kill you.

"And it's going To kill you."

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Lance.

"Lance."

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This is For the flowers.

"This is For the flowers."

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Now, Mr. Indifference,

"Now, Mr. Indifference,"

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You going to tell me That doesn't Bother you?

"You going to tell me That doesn't Bother you?"

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Well, i have to admit,

"Well, i have to admit,"

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For a while there, my life Passed before my eyes,

"For a while there, my life Passed before my eyes,"

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But the funny thing is You weren't in it.

"But the funny thing is You weren't in it."

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Right.

"Right."

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Lance, let's go.

"Lance, let's go."

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Diane!

"Diane!"

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Yes, sam.

"Yes, sam."

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It would've bothered me If he had done this.

"It would've bothered me If he had done this."

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Yes, i can see Where that

"Yes, i can see Where that"

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Might have given you Cause for concern.

"Might have given you Cause for concern."

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So, diane, are you About ready to go?

"So, diane, are you About ready to go?"

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Uh... Lance.

"Uh... Lance."

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Thank you.

"Thank you."

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Lance, i just remembered

"Lance, i just remembered"

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I have to work This weekend.

"I have to work This weekend."

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That's ok. I understand.

"That's ok. I understand."

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Lance: good-bye.

"Lance: good-bye."

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Diane: Good-bye, lance.

"Diane: Good-bye, lance."

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Well, kid, You blew it.

"Well, kid, You blew it."

Cheers

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