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Clips from Cheers - Homicidal Ham (S02E02)

OH, DEAR.

"OH, DEAR."

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NO, WELL, SEE...

"NO, WELL, SEE..."

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I WAS SPEAKING AS A FRIEND, ANDY.

"I WAS SPEAKING AS A FRIEND, ANDY."

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IF I GAVE YOU ANY OTHER IMPRESSION,

"IF I GAVE YOU ANY OTHER IMPRESSION,"

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I'M SORRY.

"I'M SORRY."

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REALLY SORRY.

"REALLY SORRY."

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I DO LOVE YOU...

"I DO LOVE YOU..."

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AS A FRIEND.

"AS A FRIEND."

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OK?

"OK?"

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SURE.

"SURE."

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YOU'RE NOT UPSET?

"YOU'RE NOT UPSET?"

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NO. NO.

"NO. NO."

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YOU'RE NOT ANGRY WITH ME?

"YOU'RE NOT ANGRY WITH ME?"

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THAT'S OK.

"THAT'S OK."

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I'LL USE IT IN MY PERFORMANCE.

"I'LL USE IT IN MY PERFORMANCE."

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YET, SHE MUST DIE...

"YET, SHE MUST DIE..."

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ELSE SHE BETRAY MORE MEN.

"ELSE SHE BETRAY MORE MEN."

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WONDERFUL!

"WONDERFUL!"

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THAT WAS PERFECT.

"THAT WAS PERFECT."

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PUT OUT THE LIGHT,

"PUT OUT THE LIGHT,"

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AND THEN...

"AND THEN..."

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PUT OUT THE LIGHT.

"PUT OUT THE LIGHT."

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ANDY, PLEASE, IT'S TIME. YOU READY?

"ANDY, PLEASE, IT'S TIME. YOU READY?"

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AAH!

"AAH!"

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SHOW FOLK.

"SHOW FOLK."

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SHH! SHH! SHH!

"SHH! SHH! SHH!"

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GOOD EVENING, EVERYONE,

"GOOD EVENING, EVERYONE,"

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AND WELCOME TO TALENT NIGHT AT CHEERS.

"AND WELCOME TO TALENT NIGHT AT CHEERS."

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THIS EVENING, WE ARE GOING TO BEGIN

"THIS EVENING, WE ARE GOING TO BEGIN"

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WITH A SCENE FROM WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE'S OTHELLO.

"WITH A SCENE FROM WILLIAM SHAKESPEARE'S OTHELLO."

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I KNOW THAT I DON'T HAVE TO EXPLAIN THE PLAY TO PROFESSOR DeWITT.

"I KNOW THAT I DON'T HAVE TO EXPLAIN THE PLAY TO PROFESSOR DeWITT."

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BUT IT MIGHT BE HELPFUL TO SOME OF YOU

"BUT IT MIGHT BE HELPFUL TO SOME OF YOU"

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IF I EXPLAIN WHAT YOU'RE ABOUT TO SEE.

"IF I EXPLAIN WHAT YOU'RE ABOUT TO SEE."

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I WONDER WHO SHE'S TALKING ABOUT, NORM.

"I WONDER WHO SHE'S TALKING ABOUT, NORM."

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I DON'T KNOW.

"I DON'T KNOW."

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IN THIS PLAY,

"IN THIS PLAY,"

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ANDREW SCHROEDER, MY DISCOVERY,

"ANDREW SCHROEDER, MY DISCOVERY,"

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WILL ENACT THE ROLE OF OTHELLO.

"WILL ENACT THE ROLE OF OTHELLO."

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YO, ANDY! WHOO!

"YO, ANDY! WHOO!"

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THIS IS THE STORY OF A MAN

"THIS IS THE STORY OF A MAN"

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DRIVEN BY INSANE JEALOUSY

"DRIVEN BY INSANE JEALOUSY"

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TO MURDER THE WOMAN HE LOVES

"TO MURDER THE WOMAN HE LOVES"

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BECAUSE HE BELIEVES

"BECAUSE HE BELIEVES"

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THAT SHE IS IN LOVE WITH ANOTHER MAN.

"THAT SHE IS IN LOVE WITH ANOTHER MAN."

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THE SCENE WE'RE ABOUT TO DO

"THE SCENE WE'RE ABOUT TO DO"

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IS THE SCENE IN WHICH OTHELLO

"IS THE SCENE IN WHICH OTHELLO"

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ACTUALLY KILLS SAID WOMAN,

"ACTUALLY KILLS SAID WOMAN,"

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WHO WILL BE PORTRAYED BY MYSELF.

"WHO WILL BE PORTRAYED BY MYSELF."

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DID I MENTION THAT I'M PLAYING DESDEMONA?

"DID I MENTION THAT I'M PLAYING DESDEMONA?"

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OK, SO...

"OK, SO..."

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WITHOUT FURTHER ADO,

"WITHOUT FURTHER ADO,"

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THE STRANG...

"THE STRANG..."

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THE STRANGULATION SCENE.

"THE STRANGULATION SCENE."

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BUT BEFORE WE DO...

"BUT BEFORE WE DO..."

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LET'S HAVE A LITTLE BACKGROUND.

"LET'S HAVE A LITTLE BACKGROUND."

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COME ON, DIANE.

"COME ON, DIANE."

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I HAVE A BRATWURST SANDWICH.

"I HAVE A BRATWURST SANDWICH."

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NO MORE BACKGROUND. LET'S JUST HAVE THE SCENE.

"NO MORE BACKGROUND. LET'S JUST HAVE THE SCENE."

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UH, SAM...

"UH, SAM..."

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NO, NO. YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT IT.

"NO, NO. YOU DON'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT IT."

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REALLY, YOU'RE GONNA BE TREMENDOUS.

"REALLY, YOU'RE GONNA BE TREMENDOUS."

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LET ME GIVE YOU A LITTLE KISS--

"LET ME GIVE YOU A LITTLE KISS--"

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DON'T TOUCH ME. I BARELY KNOW YOU!

"DON'T TOUCH ME. I BARELY KNOW YOU!"

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ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT. LET'S GET GOING.

"ALL RIGHT. ALL RIGHT. LET'S GET GOING."

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ALL RIGHT.

"ALL RIGHT."

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ON WITH THE PLAY.

"ON WITH THE PLAY."

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IN THIS SCENE, DESDEMONA IS IN BED

"IN THIS SCENE, DESDEMONA IS IN BED"

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WHEN OTHELLO COMES IN THINKING...

"WHEN OTHELLO COMES IN THINKING..."

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VERY MISTAKENLY, I CAN ASSURE YOU.

"VERY MISTAKENLY, I CAN ASSURE YOU."

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HE'S COMPLETELY OFF-BASE ON THIS ONE.

"HE'S COMPLETELY OFF-BASE ON THIS ONE."

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HE'LL BE SICK ABOUT IT IN THE MORNING.

"HE'LL BE SICK ABOUT IT IN THE MORNING."

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THINKING THAT SHE HAS BEEN UNFAITHFUL TO HIM.

"THINKING THAT SHE HAS BEEN UNFAITHFUL TO HIM."

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WHICH, OF COURSE, SHE HASN'T.

"WHICH, OF COURSE, SHE HASN'T."

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IT IS THE CAUSE,

"IT IS THE CAUSE,"

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IT IS THE CAUSE, MY SOUL.

"IT IS THE CAUSE, MY SOUL."

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LET ME NOT NAME IT TO YOU,

"LET ME NOT NAME IT TO YOU,"

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YOU CHASTE STARS.

"YOU CHASTE STARS."

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IT IS THE CAUSE.

"IT IS THE CAUSE."

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YET I'LL NOT SHED HER BLOOD,

"YET I'LL NOT SHED HER BLOOD,"

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NOR SCAR THAT WHITER SKIN OF HERS THAN SNOW.

"NOR SCAR THAT WHITER SKIN OF HERS THAN SNOW."

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THERE. GOOD.

"THERE. GOOD."

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WELL, IT'S AGREED. NO BLOOD, NO SCARRING

"WELL, IT'S AGREED. NO BLOOD, NO SCARRING"

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AND THAT'S THE GIST OF OUR SCENE.

"AND THAT'S THE GIST OF OUR SCENE."

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OH, COME ON, DIANE.

"OH, COME ON, DIANE."

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SAM, WHAT'S WRONG WITH DIANE TONIGHT?

"SAM, WHAT'S WRONG WITH DIANE TONIGHT?"

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AW, SHE JUST GOT A LITTLE STAGE FRIGHT. THAT'S RIGHT.

"AW, SHE JUST GOT A LITTLE STAGE FRIGHT. THAT'S RIGHT."

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HEY, DIANE, THE SOONER YOU START,

"HEY, DIANE, THE SOONER YOU START,"

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THE SOONER YOU'LL BE FINISHED.

"THE SOONER YOU'LL BE FINISHED."

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WHO'S THERE?

"WHO'S THERE?"

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OTHELLO?

"OTHELLO?"

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AYE, DESDEMONA.

"AYE, DESDEMONA."

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WILL YOU COME TO BED, MY LORD?

"WILL YOU COME TO BED, MY LORD?"

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OOH, YEAH!

"OOH, YEAH!"

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HAVE YOU PRAYED TONIGHT, DESDEMONA?

"HAVE YOU PRAYED TONIGHT, DESDEMONA?"

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I WOULD NOT KILL THY UNPREPARED SPIRIT.

"I WOULD NOT KILL THY UNPREPARED SPIRIT."

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TALK...

"TALK..."

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TALK YOU OF KILLING?

"TALK YOU OF KILLING?"

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AYE, I DO.

"AYE, I DO."

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HE'S CONVINCING.

"HE'S CONVINCING."

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THERE'S A REAL MURDEROUS INTENSITY ABOUT HIM.

"THERE'S A REAL MURDEROUS INTENSITY ABOUT HIM."

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THEN HEAVEN HAVE MERCY ON ME.

"THEN HEAVEN HAVE MERCY ON ME."

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THINK ON THY SINS.

"THINK ON THY SINS."

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SAM, ARE YOU SURE SHE'S OK?

"SAM, ARE YOU SURE SHE'S OK?"

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YEAH, SURE. SHE'S JUST ACTING, COACH.

"YEAH, SURE. SHE'S JUST ACTING, COACH."

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WELL, SHOULDN'T YOU MAKE SURE?

"WELL, SHOULDN'T YOU MAKE SURE?"

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OH, CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT SHE'D SAY IF I BUTTED IN ON HER SHAKESPEARE SCENE?

"OH, CAN YOU IMAGINE WHAT SHE'D SAY IF I BUTTED IN ON HER SHAKESPEARE SCENE?"

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TAKE HEED OF PERJURY.

"TAKE HEED OF PERJURY."

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THOU ART ON THY DEATHBED.

"THOU ART ON THY DEATHBED."

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I LOVE IT!

"I LOVE IT!"

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A DESDEMONA THAT FIGHTS BACK!

"A DESDEMONA THAT FIGHTS BACK!"

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HELP! THIS PSYCHO'S TRYING TO KILL ME!

"HELP! THIS PSYCHO'S TRYING TO KILL ME!"

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THAT'S THE ONLY LINE OF SHAKESPEARE I EVER UNDERSTOOD.

"THAT'S THE ONLY LINE OF SHAKESPEARE I EVER UNDERSTOOD."

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I SAW YOU KISSING SAM!

"I SAW YOU KISSING SAM!"

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I SAW YOU KISSING SAM!

"I SAW YOU KISSING SAM!"

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KISSING SAM?

"KISSING SAM?"

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IS THAT IN THE--

"IS THAT IN THE--"

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GET SOMEONE TO HELP ME, WILL YOU?

"GET SOMEONE TO HELP ME, WILL YOU?"

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MOMMY!

"MOMMY!"

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I'LL CLEAN UP MY ROOM, MOMMY!

"I'LL CLEAN UP MY ROOM, MOMMY!"

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WHAT TIME IS THE SECOND SHOW?

"WHAT TIME IS THE SECOND SHOW?"

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